The Legend of Zelda:The Edwaker Reuploded
by ACEAMC
Summary: Now with shorter chapters for short attention spans. What was I talking about again? Oh yeah, my story! Join Ed, Edd, Eddy, Tetra, the king of red lions and everyone else on an adventure that's as fun as is it is compleatly crazy!
1. 3 boys, one island, NOT A YAOI!

The legend of Zelda The Ed-waker

Not so long ago, before the winds of change blew, there existed three young boys. Though they were very different from each other, they were friends that shared many things; including an island called Outset Island. One was stronger than a ship's mast, and, frankly, about as bright as one. The second lacked his friend's strength, but had wisdom exceeding his years. The third was cunning and wise in the ways of money, but in general fell short of his friend's gifts. Other than this, they shared all they had: their names, their struggles, their adventures, and one** other thing** that would lead them on a wild journey across the great sea and uncover the mysteries of their homeland. For you see, when a boy turns **twelve **on Outset, he is considered an adult worthy of an ancient legend. And the **Eds, **as other islanders knew them, happened to share the same birthday**…**

"Ed, ED!!!" young Sarah shrieked at the top of her lungs as she raced across the warm sandy beaches of her island home. "Where could that moron be? ED!!!!!" this third high-pitched yelp was strong enough to carry to a house yards away, and loud enough to awaken the boy resting inside. His sock-like hat formed an arch where his eyes and bulbous nose pressed together and formed a tiny triangle in the center of his face. He yawned, exposing his spring-green tongue and gap teeth, and through a nearby window he called "Whatever Ed's done this time, I'm sure he didn't mean it." Startled by this, Sarah looked up and replied, "Oh, it's you, Double d. What are you doing in Sturgeon's house?" the little redhead asked. "Oh, well I was reading some of his manuscripts and I've seemed to have dosed off, compelling reads, really and-" Sarah cut him off "yeah, yeah, I don't want a book review, Where's my idiot brother?"

"I'm not sure, but I could probably help you find him, if you want." Double d, despite lingering sleepiness, could recall what a special day it was _"oh joy," _he thought now _"today is a quintessential day in our lives, we'll be treated as adults forevermore!" _as Double d left Sturgeon's apartment Sarah resumed her troubles "My mom wanted me to give him this stupid tunic for his birthday, how come **I **never get any gifts on my birthday?" Double d knew this complaint all too well, "Today's a special birthday for him, and for myself and Eddy. Tradition states we **must** wear this on our twelfth birthday. Which reminds me, my parent's will be disappointed if I myself am not in respectful garb, I should change. Wait here, I'll only be a moment."

Double d ran down the dirt path that led to his home. Once inside he searched the tiny cottage till he found the ceremonial tunic and hat lying on the second floor. A sticky note on top of the pile of clothes said: "happy birthday son, when we get home, we'll celebrate! Love, mom and dad." They were said to be mottled after the garbs of a legendary hero who vanquished evil long ago. Double d was glad for one thing: the hat was just like the one he wore to cover his head-scar after "the accident" and his old hat was nearly threadbare. As he changed, his eyes met the family shield where it hung in honor of the hero. _"I wonder what the hero was like,"_ he thought, _"he must have been exceedingly brave to vanquish such an evil menace"_ just as he pulled on the cap did he hear the ruckus outside.

"WOAH! JIMMY, STOP THIS CRAZY THING!" as Double d ran outside he beheld an unusual sight. A wild beast was tossing about a short boy with three black hairs. This was One of Double d's best friends, Eddy. He was hanging on for dear life to a charcoal-black pig that seemed to believe it was a bronco, while Jimmy, a young local boy, watched and yelled "Don't hurt it Eddy!" not wanting the horrible spectacle to continue, double d cried out, "EDDY, YOU'RE FRIGHTINING THE POOR CREATURE!" the pig stopped then, but inertia carried eddy into the nearby Cliffside with a loud "thud!" Double d gathered several berries from a nearby bush and called to the pig while spreading the berries on the ground, "there, now, you'll attract more flies with honey than with vinegar."

"Oh, let me guess," Eddy mumbled sarcastically as he regained consciousness, "another proverb from old man Sturgeon!" though Eddy was short for his age he made up for it in attitude. Double d, while petting the pig and soothing it, met Eddy's gaze and casually retorted, "you may not like him Eddy, but he knows a lot of useful information. For example, these berries, known as mouseberries, are commonly mixed with cornmeal to make an all-purpose pet food."

"Wowzers, Double d!" Jimmy squealed with delight, "You and Sturgeon must be the smartest people in the world!"

"Thank-you Jimmy. I-" Eddy pushed Double d aside and held out his hand towards Jimmy. "Out of the way, Sockhead! Ok, got'cha your pig, that'll be 25 rupees!"

"Eddy, I'm ashamed of you!" Double d shouted as his friend. Eddy froze in terror, but not because he was being convicted by Double d. A large, broad shouldered young man now stood behind Double d. his sea-blue hair glistened in the sun, and you could almost see blue stubble on his chin. Double d didn't notice the man's presence, and thus continued his rant, " Not only have you stolen Rolf's pig, the pig he's tirelessly raised for months, but add to it plan to sell it to Jimmy at a price you KNOW he can't afford! You aught to be-" suddenly, He sensed the man's presence, and turned around to see. "Oh Hello Rolf!" he announced surprised. "Stealing Rolf's pigs yet again, Flat-As-a-Deck-Head Ed boy!?!" Rolf yelled in a rage. "Uh, I just…" was all Eddy could say. "Oh Rolf, he took the piggy for me! If anyone's to blame it's my want of a pet." Rolf's anger was gone as soon as it came, "Well then, fluff-head Jimmy, if you're willing to take care of it, I'll let you take him for Eddy's offered price." Jimmy's heart sank; he only had a few small rupees. Double d came to his aid, "Save your rupees, he's on me." Double d fished through his pockets, but only found one red rupee, good for twenty. "Oh dear." He whispered as he handed the rupees to Rolf "it seems I'm a tad short at the moment, perhaps I could-"

"No need, Double-d-edd-boy" he replied, "Your kindness has warmed the heart of the grandson-of-a-warrior, twenty rupees will do, yah!" and with that Rolf left for his grandfather Orcas house, and Jimmy giggled "thank-you Double d! Now what am I going to name this little oinky-woinky!" and with that he returned to his house. "Way to go, sockhead!" Eddy yelled at Double d. "Well," Double d replied matter-of-factly, "if you want money so badly, tomorrow's your chance. Once your twelve, you're considered old enough to make your own decisions, such as finding a job or leaving." Eddy's spirit lightened, "Oh, Yeah! I know what I'm doing… I'll hop on that merchant-guy's boat,"

"You mean Beedle?" Double d asked. "Yeah, that guy's! And I'll get him to take me to Windfall Island, then it'll be smooth sailing from there! They DO call it the 'island made of money!"

"Yes well, that all sounds quaint, but we really should find Ed, and you should be in the ceremonial garbs!" Double d commented on Eddy's usual yellow tee shirt and jeans. "NO WAY AM I DRESSIN UP LIKE THAT!" Eddy sharply retorted. "But Eddy, it's tradition!"

"Forget tradition, I HATE getting clothes for my birthday, and especially dorky duds like that" Eddy hated being thought of as a dork, "Eddy, Nazz and Kevin are gone, so there's no reason to-" "DON'T REMIND ME!" Eddy yelled sharply "There's no way I'm wearing that!"

"You'll wear that tunic young man if the Whole village's gotta force ya!" Cried a stout old man from the balcony of a nearby house. "Everyone who's ever lived on this island's worn the hero's clothes, and I'll be darned if you're the first not to, now git!"

"Augh, fine!" Eddy marched sullenly to his home. Double d started to follow, but turned back for just a moment, "Thank-you, Sturgeon." He said to the old man. " Oh, always happy to help, I'm looking forward to tomorrow!" Eddy, who overheard the last part slowed down to match his friend's speed, "Tomorrow, wait a minute! What're YOU doing tomorrow?" he asked accusingly. "Unlike you," Double d replied, "I will be staying here and studying under Sturgeon in the ways of the world"

"YOU"RE STAYING ON THIS ONE-BOAT ISLAND?!?" Eddy shouted in disbelief.

"I don't see much reason in leaving this island. Rolf's still here, and he's not filled with wanderlust, and neither am I." Before they entered Eddy's house, he retorted, "Well while your wasting these years behind a stack of books, I'll actually BE in the real world, so there!" as Eddy changed in a secluded cove in his house, Double d admired a pictograph on his wall, on it Eddy stood next to a taller man who was garbed in a larger form of hero's clothes, "I suppose this was taken on your brother's twelfth birthday?" Eddy reemerged and replied, " Yep, just before he left." "Whatever happened to him?" "Last time I heard, he was working on some pirate ship, any way's let's find Ed!"

Sarah was waiting near Eddy's house, with Jimmy in tow. "Have you found him?" she asked impatiently. "Yeah, yeah, we're getting to that!" Eddy barked back, he and Sarah never really "hit it off". "Maybe he's sailed away, never to return!" Jimmy hypothesized. "Well, that's a decent theory Jimmy," Double d consulted, " but the last small boat in good working order was taken a week ago when Johnny left. Besides, Ed would've told us if he left so soon, I honestly think he's sleep-walked somewhere and is still sleeping there." "Yah, ok!" Eddy agreed, "So where do you think he IS?"

"Well, the path to the forest has been blocked by trees for bridge repairs, and if he wandered out into the ocean, the shock would've woken him up, and we've checked all the households in the village, including his own. So that leaves one likely place…" his eyes scanned upwards to a large tower that overlooked miles of Open Ocean, as the others followed Double d's gaze, the tower's code-name came to their lips and came forth as one… **"Aryll's Lookout!"**

"The history of this tower goes back to when Sturgeon and Orca were children, but the actual name 'Aryll's Lookout' is only a few decades old-"

"**We don't need a tour guide Double d" **Eddy Yelled to his friend, "Just keep climbing!" soon all four of them were on top of the platform and looking down on a sleeping figure. Curled up in a purple blanket he snored like a half-dead moblin, while standing he'd be considered to be the tallest boy on the island. One long mono-brow formed a ridge over his closed eyes, but he appeared to have no chin. "Well, seems like my Hypothesis was indeed correct!" normally just hearing others on the platform would wake a person up, but Ed was a heavy sleeper "Ed, Ed," cooed Eddy before roaring "WAKE UP PRINCESS!" Ed jolted up in surprise, but seeing his friends and his sister put him in his usual gleeful mood. "HI GUYS!" he happily shouted. "Ed, do you remember what day it is?" Double d asked patiently. "Uh, Friday?" he answered, "The idiot's still half asleep!" Sarah exclaimed. " Now Ed, surly you must remember," Ed puzzled over it for a few seconds, until Eddy lost his patience "IT'S OUR BIRTHDAY, STUPID!" Ed leapt to his feet with joy then "OH BOY! THAT MEANS I'M OLD ENOUGH TO USE A SWORD AND VANQUISH THE GREAT EVIL!" They all gave him the "Ed: the village idiot" look before Eddy replied sarcastically, "Good luck finding monsters, bonehead!" But Double d came to his defense "Actually Eddy, according to the legend, there were once monsters in the world, perhaps they're still are . . ." The two youngsters perked up at the mention of a legend, "Really, a legend?" Jimmy asked

"My, yes, it's the reason we dress like this on our twelfth birthday. No one's ever told you it?" both Sarah and Jimmy shook their heads," "Well, then I guess I'll have to tell you before you grow too old for stories."

"Long ago, there existed a kingdom where a golden power lay hidden, it was a prosperous land, blessed with green fields, tall mountains, and peace"

"Yawn," interrupted Eddy. "Yes, well," Double d continued, "but one day, a man of great evil found the golden power and took it for himself. With its strength at his command, he spread darkness throughout the kingdom"

"Compelling." Commented Ed, "thank you, But then, when all hope had died, and the hour of doom seemed at hand…." He paused a moment to read the audiences' faces, all of whom were comptemplating the next turn of the story. "…. A young boy clothed in green appeared as if from nowhere. Wielding the blade of evil's bane, he sealed the dark one away and gave the land light." "Ooooh, neat-o" squeaked Jimmy "This boy, who traveled through time to save the land, was known as the **hero of time.** The boy's tale was passed down through generations until it became a legend," "I think we get it," Sarah stated slightly annoyed, "but there's more!" Double d assured "a day came when a fell wind began to blow across the kingdom. The great evil all had thought had been sealed away by the hero, once again crept forth from the depths of the earth, eager to resume its dark designs. The people believed the hero of time would again come to save them…" suspense lingered on their faces, " But the hero did not appear. Faced by an onslaught of evil, the people could do nothing but appeal to the gods. In the last hour, as doom drew nigh, they left their future in the hands of fate. What became of this kingdom?" he searched his companion's faces for an answer and then continued, "none remain who know. The memory of that kingdom vanished, but it's legend survived on winds breath," he said gesturing to the flowing air currents, " On our island, it's become customary to garb boys in green when they turn twelve, speaking of which, Ed, we've brought your hero's clothes." Ed smiled and stripped down to his underwear without hesitation. "ED!" Eddy and Sarah simultaneously yelled as they were barraged with filthy clothing. "Such a time also allows a boy, now considered a man, to make his own decisions in life. Some, like Ed for example, will find swords and hunt down 'monsters'. While others, like Rolf and myself, will and have chosen to make this island our PERMANENT home. While others still, like Kevin, Johnny, and Eddy, have chosen to sail off to live on far away islands to earn a living and find their destiny." Ed and Jimmy gasped when they learned Eddy's plan. "PAL OF MINE, DO NOT LEAVE US!" Ed cried in distress. "Sorry lumpy," Eddy replied slyly " But I'll never strike it rich in this sorry swamp! I'm going places!"

" Good riddance, if you ask me!" replied Sarah coldly. "You know, now that I really think about it," Double d reminisced, " this day may be the last time we ever see each other." Huge tears were rolling down Ed's face, Eddy's con man image melted into a slightly softer character "There goes the old team," he mumbled, Jimmy and even Sarah seemed touched by the last stand of a life-long friendship. "GROUP HUG!" Ed sobbed as he pulled Eddy and Double d into one of his famous backbreaking hugs.

"Ow!" Double d yelped as something hard pressed against his thigh, "Ed is there something in your pocket?"

"Not I, Double d." "Well then, that must mean something is in mine." Double d reached into his pocket and pulled out a tapered cylinder with glass on both ends. It was painted red and yellow and adorned with tiny seagulls. On the larger end a sticky note read: "Dear Eddward, consider this a special gift. Boy, does it bring back memories…. Use it well, Dad." He didn't need to examine it long to know what exactly it was. "IT'S AN ARYLL GRADE TELISCOPE!" Eddy yelled excitedly. "That's the highest quality of telescope there is!" Sarah gasped. " How'd you get it?" Eddy asked accusingly. "Well, my dad DOES make telescopes among other things, so it would only make sense that he can get them for free, like Kevin can get jawbreakers. They say you can see for miles with an Aryll." Double d reasoned as he examined the sea. "Oh, oh! Can I see it Double d?" Ed asked with glee. "Of course, Ed." After giving Ed the telescope and teaching him which end you look through, Ed examined all he could see from there. "That name…. Aryll, show's up a lot around here," Eddy commented " What do you think it means?"

"Maybe the telescope's named after the lookout?" Sarah suggested.

"Actually," Double d replied, "I believe both the landing and the telescope were named after a girl that Sturgeon mentioned in one of his journals, she-"

"GUY'S LOOK!" Ed yelled focusing the telescope on the town mailbox. Standing next to it was a man who appeared to be half bird and half human. " IT IS THE LEGANDARY BIRD MAN OF MOUNT DOOM!"

Eddy gave him a weird look that could either pity or embarrassment "Try 'postman' Bonehead! And yeah, they all look like freaks." While Eddy was reprimanding Ed Double d, rolled his eyes towards the sky, that roll of the eyes would change his life forever.

"Ed, Eddy, LOOK UP AT THE SKY!"

"WHAT, WHERE, WHO?" Ed asked while swinging the telescope wildly trying to find the sky, nearly hitting Eddy with it. "He said 'The sky' stupid," Eddy said as he grabbed the telescope and turned it to the right direction. Through the contraption, he could see a giant bird, at least a hundred times bigger than a seagull, with grand purple feathers and a huge stone mask. "W-what's that?!?" Eddy asked in terror as Double d took a peek through the telescope, "It appears to be Helmrocodus Rex-"

"IN ENGLISH, SOCKHEAD!" Eddy yelled in annoyance of Double d's brilliance, "It's commonly known as the Helmroc King, but I can't imagine what it's doing-" Double d unintentionally focused from the bird's head to its reptilian-looking feet, and to his surprise he saw them grasping a girl. She was dressed like a boy, but feminine look about her face proved she was a girl; her short hair was tied into an unusual looking bun. " ED, EDDY, IT'S HOLDING A GIRL CAPTIVE." Eddy snatched the telescope then, "Let me see! Say, she's kinda cute…"

"EDDY, SHE'S BEING KIDNAPPED! How can you even think like that at a time like this?" Ed turned a moment north to see another unusual site.

"GUYS, LOOK!" Ed shouted as he grabbed the telescope, while Eddy hung limply from it, "IT'S THE BLACK PEARL, COME TO FETCH BACK WITTY JACK!" Ed shouted excitedly. "ED YOU IDIOT!" shouted Eddy, kicking him in the gut cartoonishly "DO YOU WANT US TO BE SUED?!?!"  
It was red and black ship with a hand-carved sea monster on the prow, its sails were painted with two crossed swords, and the Jolly Roger was flying from the ship's mast. A catapult on the deck of the boat was firing huge boulders at the Helmroc King, while the Eds and other islanders watched in awe until one hit it square in the jaw. "BOOM, HEADSHOT" Eddy screeched as the bird and the girl plummeted to earth. The unconscious girl landed in the dense forest on the other side of the island, while the bird sank into the sea. Jimmy was the first to speak "You have to go save her, that's what the hero would do!"

"Why should we? We're no heroes!" Eddy barked without hesitation.

"I agree with Jimmy, after all, we may not be heroes, but we're witnesses and we can't just leave her there," Double d explained

"Oh, goody, goody!" Ed gleefully chimed, "Hero time, HERO TIME!"

"You two can go if you want. I, uh, gotta pack!"

"You're just a big chicken!" Sarah accused.

"Am not!" Eddy shot back, "I've just got better things to do…"

"Eddy," Double d reasoned softly "If you save her, she'll probably be very grateful…"

"SO!" Eddy replied.

"So she might give you a reward; like a date, or maybe some rupees-"

"WHAT'RE WE WAITING FOR?" Eddy shouted with rupees in his eyes, "LET'S GO SAVE US A MAIDEN!"  
"But, Eddy, WAIT! We'll need something to protect us…"

"Not on the first date, Double d!" Eddy replied smiling.

"I MEANT A SWORD!" He shouted while blushing at the suggestion, "Who knows what could be lurking in the dark…."

After crossing the two bridges between Aryll's Lookout and the Orca/Sturgeon Residence, the Eds had a chance to speak to the only swordsman on the island, Rolf's Grandfather and mentor, Orca. "So, you want to learn the way of the sword, Eh?" he bellowed with a smile.

"Yes sir, Direly!" Double d replied

"Very Well, Rolf! Fetch the hero's sword!"

"We'll train you, first, Double d. then Ed, Then Eddy," Orca announced

"Hey, why do THEY go first?" Eddy shouted.

"Double d said he needed it direly, and Ed has been asking to learn for years, you've never really seem to care."

Orca taught the Eds how to slash up enemies and how to perform a parry attack and had them all demonstrate against Rolf.

"You boys learn fast, but unfortunately, I only have that one sword. I hope you're alright with sharing it."

"Thank-you for letting us have one at all!" Double d replied as the Ed's left the training grounds.

"Good luck, Hero-that-resembles-an-elf Ed boy!" Rolf called as the door shut.

"Well, THAT was a gas…"Eddy responded sarcastically as the three walked the path that led to the forest

"Come on, Eddy. That girl needs our help!" Double d begged.

"Begone, foul creatures of Hades!" Ed shouted as he cut a billboard in half.

"See, Ed's passionate about this. It's just like old times, Huh Eddy," Eddy and Double d watched nostalgically as Ed Hacked through trees, making a path

"Yeah, we used to have some real Adventures in these forests…" Eddy responded as they crossed the rickety overhanging bridge that led to the woods.

"We'd play soldier and explorer… until the kanker sisters set up base there of course." Double d reminded them.

Ed and Eddy stopped dead in their tracks. "Now I remember why I didn't want to come here in the first place!" Eddy yelled

"Do you think they're still there, Double d?" Ed asked like a scared child.

"I'm not sure," he lied, "but even if they were we don't have to be there for long. Just go in, save the girl, and get out."

They still looked terrified, "Ed, aren't you always talking about being a monster hunter, and we all agree the kankers are monsters, so now's your chance" Ed stood straight and tall with the sword in his hands and replied "monster hunter, Ed reporting for duty!"

"And Eddy, remember the reward?" Double d goaded. Eddy got a greedy look in his eyes when he said "reward"

"We said it ourselves, this may be the last adventure we ever go on together, and you guy's want to chicken out now?"

"NO WAY!" the Eds yelled as one.

"Good. Now let's GO!"

The forest was dense with grass and a canopy of trees blotted out most of the sun. As soon as they entered the grove Ed began slashing the grass and ki-aiing. "Ed, Give it a- Wahoo! There's money in the grass!" Eddy grabbed the sword from Ed and hacked the foliage to pieces. "I remember reading somewhere that creatures called picori hide money in grass and pots for hu- EDDY!"

"I'm RICH!" he cried rolling in cut grass and green rupees.

"Thirty seven rupees is no excuse to destroy nature" Double d replied with contempt.

"Hey, Guys, I found something!" Ed yelled from a nearby ridge. On the other side stood a creature that resembled a cross between a human and a cat, but with a pig's snout.

"What's with all the freaks?" Eddy asked while Double d pulled out his telescope and focused on the monster, "It's a bokoblin, Eddy. They're very savage, but if we sneak up on it, we should be able to-" Double d nearly had a heart attack when Ed charged the bokoblin, "Die, foul minion!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. "GO, LUMPY, GO!!!!" Eddy encouraged him. The bokoblin moved in, ready for a fight. "Eddy, we have to help Ed!" Double d panicked. But to both boys surprise, Ed bested the beast in a few quick slashes. "Ed, that was marvelous!" Double d commended.

"Well, the thing DID bring a stick to a swordfight!" Eddy laughed as he showed the others the monster's weapon of choice. "That's a boko stick," Double d announced "while making a poor weapon choice, they can be lit on fire and-"

"Yeah, whatever!" Eddy cut him off, "ONWARD!"

"Hey, isn't that where the kankers used to hang out?" Eddy asked pointing at a giant rock. "Actually, that's the abandoned fairy fountain, it was covered with a giant rock years ago, the supposed fairy still trapped inside."

"Let's blow it up!" cheered Ed.

"Now, now, Ed. That would be dangerous! Besides, We don't have that kind of firepower." Double d testified

"But to answer your question, Eddy, the kankers, if still here, would be right over in this valley" the three Eds looked into the depression, all but Double d expected to see their worst night mare…. the amorous kankers. But instead, the valley was empty. "Nope, NO KANKERS!" Eddy rejoiced

"They have sailed on to greener seas," Ed announced

Double d was distracted by something hanging from a nearby branch. It was the girl! "There she is!"

"Perfect! Now, how do we get her down…" Eddy asked.

"Well that branch doesn't look very strong," Double d planned as he climbed into the divot, " but if we work together we should be able to-"

"DOUBLE D, LOOKOUT!" Ed shouted as two bokoblins fell from the sky.

"Ed, might I borrow the sword?" he asked calmly as the monsters closed in. "Here ya go!" Ed responded shakily as Double d took the sword and exploded into a slashing rage "I-HATE-BEING-CUT-OFF-MID-**SENTENCE!**"

Neither monster stood a chance.

Conveniently, the girl came to just after Double d's outburst. However, not knowing her rescuers were near she struggled to free herself from the branch. And, as Double d predicted, it broke and she fell hard on the forest floor. "Good heavens! Are you all right?" Double d asked concerned as he neared the tree. "Yeah, I think so." The girl answered as the other Eds neared. For the first time they got to see her up close. She was about as tall as Double d and was slightly tan, a common trait in the great sea. However, her pointed ears are something that is VERY uncommon. Her blond hair had a sort of wild look to it, without being disheveled. She wore an orchid undershirt with a navy-blue vest, beige shorts, Greek-style sandals, gauze gauntlets and a matching red sash and bandana around her neck. A curved sword in its scabbard hung from said sash. While the Eds were evaluating her appearance, she was evaluating theirs: "What're you three wearing?" she asked judgmentally.

"See, Double d. I LOOK LIKE A DORK!"

"But Eddy, she doesn't understand the tradition." Double d replied.

"Tradition? Where am I anyway? I remember that giant bird, but after that, nothing." She asked.

"Well, we can fill in some of the blanks. This is Outset Island. I'm Edd, but everyone calls me Double d-"

"I am Ed! Monster-hunter!"

"And I'm Eddy! I was the one who rescued you by the way!"

"Sure you did." The girl replied sarcastically "Well they call me-"  
** "miss Tetra!"** a deep voice called from across the forest. Waving from the entrance of the woods was a man, a little taller than Ed with a load of muscles. Within seconds he was on the other side of the forest. "Oh miss Tetra, I'm so glad you're safe!" the man confessed "I was so worried when that bird dropped you on this summit."

"That bird dropped me on top of a mountain?" Tetra questioned, "Well, that wasn't very nice of it! Don't just stand there, let's go teach that bird a lesson!"

"But miss, what about these three?" the man asked.

"Yeah, I saved your life!" Eddy gloated

"Never mind them, they'll find their way back on their own, their 'brave, heroic' locals." And with that Tetra and the man left.

"I think she digs me!" Eddy declared when she was out of earshot. "Eddy, It was obvious she couldn't care less about your over inflated ego." Double d objected

"Whatever. Forget Beedlejuice-"

"Beedle" Double d corrected.

"Whatever! I'm heading for Windfall with those guys!"

"How do you even know they're going that way?"

"I'll use the old Eddy charm! Oh Tetra!" Eddy yelled as he dashed away.

"Oh well," Double d sighed, "come on, Ed" but Ed was on his knees, sobbing, "The trio is no more!"

"Oh, come now Ed, I'm still here-" "But I have to leave to fight monsters, I'm so conflicted!"

Double d thought this over for a moment and thought of a good way to cheer him up: "Ed, I heard your parents are making your favorite soup tonight."

"Butter toast and gravy bisque?"

"Yup!"

"ED IS HAPPY ONCE MORE!" Ed cried

They emerged from the forest to see Eddy talking to Tetra.

"So, I need a way off this crummy old island and you guys- "We're not a ferry system, and we've got better things to do!" Tetra sharply answered

"Ironic, huh Eddy!" Double d scorned.

"ED!" called Sarah from across the bridge.

"Yes baby sister!" Ed replied with a twinge of fear.

"MOM told me to get you, IT'S TIME FOR LUNCH!" She barked as they crossed the bridge

Tetra was laughing hysterically at Sarah's control of Ed, she wouldn't be laughing for long….

One thing's for certain…. no one saw the Helmroc King coming. Before anyone could react, it tore the bridge in two, and made a desperate pass for Tetra, but instead grabbed Sarah.

"ED, HELP!" she thrashed within the talons as it flew away.

"BABY SISTER! I'LL SAVE YOU!" Ed charged after the bird as if he could land on it with a mere jump, and maybe he could've, but that was where the cliff ended. "WAIT UP MONOBROW!" Eddy Yelled as he grabbed Ed's tunic. Alas, Eddy was too short and Ed's weight pulled him off the cliff too. "OH MY LORD!" Double d shouted as he grabbed Eddy by the ankles. Did I mention how little physical strength Double d has? It almost looked like the weight of the other two would pull him off the cliff and the three would plummet into the sea, until Tetra grabbed his hand and somehow briefly supported the chain of Eds. "GONZO, HELP THE OTHER TWO UP, NOW!" she shrieked.

"Right away ma'am!" Gonzo grabbed Eddy by the tunic and Ed by the exposed scruff of his and pulled both boys back onto the cliff. "Um…Thanks." Double d mumbled blushing. "Anytime!" Tetra whispered with a sly wink, she then turned her attention to Ed, "WHAT ARE YOU, STUPID OR CRAZY?" She shouted at the poor boy.

"The birdie kidnapped my sister!" he sobbed.

"Duh Ed, she was kinda THERE!" Eddy yelled. But Ed ignored him as he raced down to the shore. "Ed, WAIT!" Double d pleaded while the others followed.


	2. The pirates who don't do charity

"NO, THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!" Sobbed Jimmy beside the dirt road. As the others neared, he stopped them in grief "Oh, Eddy, Double d, an evil bird had shanghaied Sarah! You must save her, as you did the fair maiden!"

"Not so fair to me," Eddy grumbled to himself.

"Of course we will, Jimmy, what kind of people would we be if we didn't?" Double d replied

"We, WHAT'S THIS **WE** STUFF!" Eddy yelled as they continued to follow Ed. He grabbed a boat sitting near the tiny dock and pushed it into the water, screaming "I'M COMING SARAH!". He rowed out to sea while the boat quickly began to sink under him.

"ED WAIT!" Double d cried, "That boat is riddled with knotholes!" the water was up to Ed's neck now "Oh, Yeah!" he declared sheepishly as he swam for shore. "Take me to the birdie!" Ed Demanded of Tetra "What? You want to come with us?" she asked in disbelief. "I'm coming too!" Double d announced. "Do you two understand what you're asking? We're pirates! Terror of the seas! What do we get out of bringing a couple of kids with us? A headache, that's what!"

"Tetra, please!" Double d interrupted, "We **need** Sarah back, she's just-"

"I GOTTA SAVE SARAH! IF I DON'T JIMMY WILL TELL MOM, MOM WILL TELL DAD, AND DAD WILL SIT THERE AND EAT CHEESE!" Ed sobbed.

"Listen Ed, I know how you feel, but this doesn't have anything to do with us."

"And what makes you say that?" it was the postman from before.

"Wait a minute," Gonzo intervened "Who are you?! Where do you get off, butting in on other people's conversations?!"

"Well, if you never came to this island, that poor girl wouldn't have been kidnapped by that bird."

"Then again, they didn't really have control over the bird's-

Double d started before Ed covered his mouth: "Sh, the bird-man is helping us."

"Now as my work entails delivering letters, I spend much of my time traveling amongst the many islands. As a result, I hear many things." The postman continued, "Apparently girls from all over the great sea have been kidnapped by that giant bird and taken to the **Forsaken Fortress**, but instead of kidnapping a girl like you, with** pointy ears** like it normally does, it must have taken Sarah by mistake. And unless you help these boys find her, she may never be seen again."

For a moment you could almost see guilt on Tetra's face.

"Not to mention WE saved your sorry butt from bokoblins!" Eddy pointed out

"Why Eddy, I didn't know you wanted to help!" Double d confessed

"Help? I just want a free ride to Windfall!" Tetra looked at the three with pity and came to her conclusion.

"Let's make one thing clear," she announced "If' your coming with us, it's Forsaken Fortress or bust! I'll give you guy's an hour to pack and say good-bye to this island, anyone who isn't back on time is left behind!"

"NO WAY!" Eddy yelled.

"Aw, Come on Eddy!" Ed begged

"FORGET IT!" he repeated

"Eddy, I really hoped I wouldn't have to resort to this, but when it's over I'll tell you where to find one-hundred rupees on this island if you just come help us." Double d promised. Eddy leaped in the air "See ya guys in an hour!" he shouted with joy as he ran for home.

"Thank You Bird-man" Ed wailed as he pulled him into another hug. "No problem, name's Quill, by the way." he choked out before Ed left for his house. "Thank-you, Tetra." Double d humbly announced as he left for his home.

"Hey, Double d!" Tetra called as he was almost home.

"Find something you can use as a shield. The Forsaken Fortress is dangerous, and I don't want you to get killed." Despite wording it to sound tough, her real concern reached him. "Ok." He shakily replied as he entered his home for the last time in a long time.

"_Why does she remind me so much of Nazz?"_ he thought as he gathered his magnifying glass and several books into his rucksack. _"No, don't think of Nazz, she's gone. Keep to the task at hand."_ He had gathered many nonperishable foods and brought all he thought would be useful, and he wrote a letter to his parents about the circumstance and telling them not to worry. "_Just one more thing"_ he thought as he filled out a small sticky-note. He lifted the family shield from its laurels and stuck the note in its place. It read

Dear mom and dad,

My Quest requires the use of our

Family shield's protection. I hope it

Will not be too terribly missed.

Love,

Eddward.

As Double d left his house and locked it, one other duty occurred to him, _"I should tell Sturgeon that I'd miss a few lessons while gone"_ before knocking on his door Sturgeon answered, as if he knew Double d would come. "I'll take it you're going with them pirates to save Ed's sister."

"Yes…how did you know?"

"I heard it all from my balcony. What you're doing's very brave."

"Well, Ed and I have known each other from birth, I have to help him in his time of need."

"That reminds me a lot of myself when I was younger, I used to be a swordsman too, y'know!"

"REALLY! But you hate it when Orca practices swordplay!"

"That's cause he's always stronger than me, but I was always the smart one. That reminds me, wait here." Sturgeon ran back into his house and within moments reemerged with a book in his hands. It was a gold journal, though it looked a little worn in places. The cover read in large red letters:

_**The Wayfarer's Guide to the Great Sea**_

_**By Sturgeon**_

"I wrote that on my travels while journeying with my brother, though it's still got lot's of room for improvement. Write about your travels, about monsters weaknesses, songs, anything you think deserves a place in it."

"Thank-you, I promise I'll take good care of it." Double d promised.

"I know you will boy, now hurry, You've got ten minutes till the hour's up!"

Ed and Eddy sat on the dock with their bags full of what they thought they would need (which to Ed constituted almost everything he owned). When they saw Double d coming they made room for him. "Look Double d! My parents filled a bottle with gravy just for me when the heard I'd be leaving!" Ed Announced excitedly.

"That's wonderful, Ed!" Double d humored.

"So what's this?" Eddy grabbed the guide and flipped through the pages

"It's a guidebook Sturgeon entrusted to me for continuation and general safekeeping." Double d stated with pride. No, not THAT kind of pride!

"Are you three ready?" Tetra impatiently asked from the deck of her huge ship.

"We'll be there momentarily!" Double d assured as the three walked up the gangplank to the hull. Eddy's bag seemed exceedingly heavy on his shoulders. "Here Eddy, let me help you with that." Double d offered, until he got a good look at it… "Eddy, Did you pack anything but rupees?"

"Who needs stuff when you've got money!"

"I agree that money is important for the journey, but I didn't make it the centerpiece of my supplies." Double d opened his own bag to show him. "I keep a small wallet, along with a filled bait bag and several containers of nonperishable foods, amongst other things."

"Hey Tetra! We ready to go?" Called a pirate from the very back of the ship, near a gong. Physically he was as tall and muscular as Gonzo, but he sported a beard that formed a ring around his head, like a lion's mane.

"BRO?" Eddy asked, almost breathless.

"PIPSQUEAK?!?" The pirate looked shell- shocked, as Eddy got closer.

"Senza, You know this kid?" Tetra asked in surprise

"KNOW HIM? I TAUGHT HIM EVERYTHING I KNOW!" Senza replied, giving Eddy a Dutch-rub.

"What're ya doing here, bro?" Eddy asked.

"Working. Didn't I tell you in my letter that I was working on a pirate ship? What about you, still planning to strike it rich on windfall?"

"Yeah, but first I gotta save Ed's sister. The Brat got herself kidnapped."

"Heh, reminds me of all those times I'd bail you outta trouble. You know, we didn't plan this, but I'm kinda glad I got to see ya today, I always wondered what I'd be like to see you as a man…"

"Sorry to interrupt this little love fest," Tetra sarcastically chimed in, "-but we've gotta get going. The Forsaken Fortress is a long way off."

"Yes, Ma'am!" all on deck saluted.

The ship shoved off at high noon. Everyone who was currently in the village, which included Jimmy, Ed's parents, Orca, Rolf, and Sturgeon turned out to see the Ed's off.

"Good luck, boys!" Orca and Sturgeon called out.

"Don't forged to wear clean underwear, Ed!" his mom reminded.

"Yes, mommie!" Ed replied.

"HIT THAT MEAN OLD BIRD ONCE FOR ME!" Jimmy demanded.

"Let luck be with you, three-acting-as-one Ed boys!"

"Au Revoir Fellow villagers," Double d responded

" Ya, See ya around!" Eddy quickly hissed

"Gravy!" Ed shouted without thought.

The islander's waved, smiling superficially until they were sure the Ed's were out of earshot, then Rolf announced flatly, "They are dead."

"Mmm-hmm!" Ed's mom agreed ambling back home. The rest followed suit except for Sturgeon and Jimmy.

"Too bad." Sturgeon mumbled, "Double d would've made a great assistant, if only he hadn't followed that 'saving Sarah' moonshine!"

"But Sturgeon," Jimmy weakly interjected, "What if they do rescue her?"

"Look sonny, thirty years ago, another little girl was kidnapped from this island and her brother tried to do the same thing The Ed's are doing today three times; we're lucky that one ever returned alive on his own. And knowing how pathetic a team those three are, there's really no hope."

Jimmy stared out to sea, his only hope of seeing his childhood friend and protector again crossing the horizon, and he thought as he did so: _they may be pathetic, but they're the only heroes left on this island of doubters._

As Eddy and Ed stashed away their things Tetra addressed them.

"You three will be working with Niko in the hold."

"Oh, I get it! He's the first mate, right?" Eddy deduced with enthusiasm

"Actually, Gonzo's the first mate. Niko's the guy that washes our underwear…"

"Figures!" Eddy grumbled.

"Now I really CAN wear clean underwear!" Ed yelled with joy. As the other two left for the hold, Double d stayed behind for just a moment.

"Thanks again for taking us with you" He told her yet again.

"Just because I'm a pirate, doesn't mean I can't do a good deed," she replied, "Now hurry down to the hold, I've got work to do!"

Double d caught up to his friends in a small chamber that lead to both the hold and another room that another muscular pirate was guarding.

"I'm not lettin' ya in here, squirt. This is Tetra's room, most of us real pirates aren't allowed in here."

"Oh, really…" Eddy whispered.

"Eddy, we should really be getting to Niko, and NOT CAUSING TROUBLE!" Double d advised.

"Buttered toast!" was Ed's clueless reply as they made their way down into the hold.

"They're you are!" before them stood a short rat like pirate, about as tall as Eddy "I'm Niko. And as of today, you three are my swabbies!"

"Do we have to wash underwear?" Eddy asked sourly, "Cause I've washed enough underwear for one life… Unless of course, they're Tetra's we're talking about!"

"EDDY, THAT'S DISGUSTING!" Double d shouted in humiliation.

"Nah, I've got something better planned." Niko answered.

"Oh boy, do we get to play duck-duck-goose?" Ed suggested.

"No, Better! You get to take the 'initiation test!' watch what I do, and you'll get the idea." he waddled over to a large pressure switch and jumped onto it. After doing so, several platforms rose from the bottom of the floor, to the height of the main drop-off Niko and the Eds were standing on.

"Ingenious!" whispered Double d.

"Steppin' on the switch is the only easy part." Niko reminded them as he ran from the switch to a nearby platform. "Now, ya see, that next platform's too far away, right?" he jumped from the platform to a hanging light fixture, and grabbed the hempen rope securing it to the ceiling. "That's when ya gotta do this!" he instructed while swinging on the rope. He continued alternating between platforms and ropes until he was on the other side of the room, where a small nook hid a chest.

"Ah, that's easy!" Eddy challenged

"EASY?" Niko roared "You'll be lucky if the three of you can finish it in a year!"

"Me first! Me first!" Ed begged.

"Be our guest." Double d stepped aside for Ed.

Ed stomped the switch into the ground and leapt for the platform as Niko did, but while swinging overshot the second, smashing into the wooden walls of the ship. "See, it isn't easy!" Niko gloated as he pointed to a ladder next to the platform. "Try again, swabbie." Ed tried five more times, the platforms falling early twice. But the sixth try did the trick.

"I DID IT GUYS!" He announced

"Good swabbie, here's a cookie." Niko took a piece of hardtack from his pocket and tossed it off the nook's edge. Ed leapt after it and shook the whole ship with a belly flop.

"Ok, Mr. Overconfident!" He addressed Eddy "You're turn."

"Don't blink." Eddy gloated, as he leapt from the platform to the first rope, doing slightly better than Ed on the initial try, but falling on the third rope.

"Hah! Told ya!" Niko boasted from the nook while Eddy muttered unspeakable filth. It took him ten tries to get where Ed got to in six.

"All right, last swabbie, let's see what you got!"

"Well, I guess I should give it the old college try." Double d stepped onto the switch without an ounce of confidence. He grabbed the rope and swung just over the platform…but didn't let go! "Hurry up, sockhead!" Eddy goaded,

"I'm trying! But every time I almost let go, I lose my nerve!" He sheepishly confessed.

"You can do it, Double d!" Ed encouraged as his friend swung limply from the light fixture. _"I've got to try"_

He let go, landing in the center of the platform. "I DID IT!" he exclaimed with pride. "Let's see ya do it again!" Niko challenged.

Again he swung a couple of times before letting go, turning in accordance to the platform's direction, continuing along the platforms until he heard a loud ticking, the platforms were about to drop. He leapt to the final rope in time, but the final platform was now gone.

"Oh, so close! Tell ya what, I'll-" this time Niko was cut off, by Double d of all people! He swung from the rope to the cove, a meter and a half away, and just barely made it on his first try! As his friends helped him into the cove, Niko stood amazed. "N-no one's ever completed it in one try! What's you're name swabbie?" He asked.

"Eddward, but everyone calls me Double d."

"I am honored to have you as my underling, Double d. As a reward for finishing in record time, please take what's in the chest." Niko stepped aside as Double d opened the chest, in it laid a bag, designed to look like a monster. "It's a spoils bag, you use it to hold the things monsters drop."

"Sweet!" Eddy perked up.

"Hey, hey!" Niko intervened, "That's Double d's not yours!"

"That's ok, Niko. We're childhood friends, I'll probably end up letting him hold it anyway."

"Guy's we're here!" Tetra called from above.

"We'll be up shortly!" Double d responded, as he swung his way back to the main platform.

" And, with such style…" Niko whispered, "I'll have to design a more challenging course!"

"Nice knowin' ya!" Eddy sarcastically yelled as he departed.

"Whatever,"

"See you later, Mr. Niko-" Ed absent-mindedly walked right off the platform, into a face plant, while Niko let fly a sadistic grin.

The moon and stars lightened the dark sky when the Eds reemerged from the hold. "Niko's prediction that our trial would take a year fell far short, I believe we were down there for no more than eight hours." Double d deduced.

"Whatever. Tetra, we're ready!" Eddy Called into the night.

"I'm up here, loudmouth!" She responded from high upon the crow's nest. "Hurry up!"

"But Tetra," Double d pleaded, "You're so high up!"

"And you call yourselves men." She rolled her eyes.

"WHAZZAT S'POSED TO MEAN?" Eddy challenged, practically dragging his pals to the mast

The three climbed the mast's ladder, their muscles aching from their previous endeavor. When they finally reached the top, they could see a large stone Fort rising from the never-ending Sea. How grand was it you ask? Anchors bigger than cows swayed from rising platforms in the breeze. "What were you three doing down there with Niko?" She asked as soon as they were on their feet.

"The initiation!" Ed answered.

"In- what Initiation? Well, whatever! That's the Forsaken Fortress." She pointed to a window surrounded with seagulls "I'll bet that's where they're keeping your sister, Ed."

"BABY SISTER!" Ed shouted as he tried to jump from the nest to the Fortress.

"WAIT ED!" Double d and Tetra Both yelled as they grabbed for Ed's tunic… and through fate their hands overlapped in one place as they caught him. Dragging him back into the nest their eyes met for just a moment. Putting up a tough front, she crossed her arms and turned back towards the fortress, dropping Ed on his face.

"Anyway, since you guy's are the only ones going in, instead of risking a fight, we'll try a different approach…." She gave them a look that couldn't mean anything good.

"Tetra, why're you looking at us lik-"

WHAM!

"_Augh, my head,"_ Double d thought as he re gained consciousness, _"what happened?"_ he went to rub his aching head, but his hand was pressed tightly between himself and Ed. When he looked down he saw what bound them and Eddy together. A huge Barrel held the three snugly in place, while it rested on the catapult's launching pad. Eddy was the first to speak,

"HEY! WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?" He seethed.

"It's the best idea we could come up with." Tetra defended herself.

"I object!" Double d protested, "This is Horrifyingly dangerous and unconventional!"

"Relax, we've done this hundreds of times, we'll launch you real good!" Senza declared.

"I believe you meant 'well', correct?"

"GET ME OUTTA HERE!"

"Prepare to launch!" she ordered Gonzo.

" 3"

"What a weasel!" Eddy cursed.

" 2"

"Oh dear…" Double d mumbled in terror.

"1"

"Let it begin!" Ed Begged.

The catapult launched the three screaming into the night sky.

"See ya around, Eddy!" Senza yelled while laughing at the rolling barrel. Tetra watched coolly.

"_Good luck,"_ she thought watching what could've easily been a jackass rip-off flying away at about twelve miles per hour.


	3. A nagging stone?

"!" the Eds trademark scream of terror pierced the moonlit night until they hit the inner wall hard, sending their sword flying. The three dropped like rocks into the small harbor of the Fortress. They swam to the steps of the castle and gathered their senses.

"Why, if I ever see Tetra Again I'll-" Eddy fumed

"You'll what?" a muffled voice challenged. Something crawling in Double d's pocket made him jump.

"ED!" he accused.

"It wasn't me!" he testified

Double d searched his pockets until he pulled out a green crystal, about as large as the palm of his hand and bound in a thin hemp cord. Through some magic the stone began to glow and levitate.

"Tell me, Eddy," Tetra's voice carried through the stone. "What are you so eager to do when we meet next?"

"Uh, nothing…" he lied.

"I slipped this in your pocket when you were unconscious, it's no ordinary stone either."

"No duh." Eddy agreed.

"Oh, I want a pretty magic stone, too!" Ed complained.

"Sorry Ed, but Double d's pockets are the kind I prefer my stuff in… the clean kind! And I wouldn't trust Eddy to hold a normal rock, so-"

"Well, THAT'S good to know!" Eddy sarcastically replied

"I can see anything you're doing through this stone, and you can hear me through it. I'll try and help when I can, so don't lose it!"

"I wont." Double d promised as he hung the cord that secured the stone around his neck.

"Good, now be careful, without you sword, you'll have to rely on stealth." Tetra warned

"OUR SWORD'S GONE!" the three just noticed.

"Wow, you guys are hopeless," Tetra sighed. "For now, just try to survive." The stone's light faded and the Eds were left to plan their next move alone.

"Well, we should probably find a disguise to sneak around in," Double d surveyed the area with his telescope and spotted several searchlights surveying the ground.

"Hey guys!" Ed called from inside a barrel, "I AM THE BANSHEE OF THE BARREL! RAWR!"

"Why, Ed!" Double d replied with a spark of hope, "THAT'S GENIUS!"

"You call THAT genius!" Eddy grimaced at Ed's playing.

"No Eddy, we'll travel via barrel to the inner Fortress."

The three filled one barrel perfectly. Tiny holes from insects provided eyeholes "I'll navigate from these holes," Double d instructed, "Eddy, you stay alert and tell us if the searchlights are panning back."

"Whatever." Eddy limply responded.

"And Ed, you'll lift and move the Barrel."

"I can do that, Double d!" Ed confirmed. The three seemed to be doing well, Until Eddy spotted something that would jeopardize the whole mission.

"RUPEES!" He cheered as he saw them lying on the center of a concrete courtyard where the searchlights crossed diligently.

"Ed, go that way!" Eddy demanded as Ed whinnied like a horse and changed direction.

"NO, EDDY! IT'S WAY TOO DANGEROUS!" Double d warned, but it was too late. The searchlights focused on the moving barrel; alarms echoed off the stone walls and guards were drawn to the canned prisoners.

The three were thrown into a wooden prison cell at the end of a hallway. "This is your fault!" Eddy blamed Double d.

"MY FAULT! Everything was going fine until you told Ed to go after those Rupees!"

"STOP ARGUING!" the stone around Double d's neck levitated to Eddy's eye level and Tetra shouted through it.

"You'll never make it out alive if you focus solely on money, and yes I realize I just questioned your reason to live."

"Tetra, would you by chance know a way out of here?" Double d asked.

"Nope, but you should be able to find some way outta there. Just keep looking!" the stone lost power and went limp.

"Well, you heard her," Double d announced, "Let's start looking." The Eds searched the cell for a long time without finding anything, until Eddy got frustrated.

"GET US OUT OF HERE!" he raged as he threw plates and stools against the wooden bars of the front wall, when he picked up a vase sitting on a shelf near one of the stone walls, they found it.

"Eddy, a tunnel!" Double d pointed to a hole that the vase just covered. "I bet you could crawl through it and open this cell!"

"Hey, YEAH!" Eddy agreed. He climbed into the hole and reemerged on the other side.

"Piece of cake," he boasted as he opened the door for his friends. The three walked down the hallway to the second level of a medium sized room, where a gap separated them from a door; another light fixture hung between the gap. The Eds swung across with ease and made their way outside through the door.

"Good work!" Tetra commended from the stone, "I think I see a path to the room with Sarah in it, but you'll have to take out the searchlights first."

"But how? Without our sword, we are helpless!" Ed pointed out.

"Double d, do you still have that shield?" she asked

"Yes, along with most of my supplies."

"If you can act as a sort of decoy while using it, maybe Ed and Eddy can sneak up on the searchlight operator and take him out."

"I-I don't know," Double d stuttered thinking about his scar "That . . . That really sounds dangerous…"

"Trust me, it's the only way to save Sarah." Then the stone went silent.

The three climbed the stone ramp that led to the first searchlight. Ed, even without his sword, was excited about fighting a monster and saving his sister. Double d, on the other hand, was mortified. As they climbed the ladder that led to the watchtower Eddy tried to give him confidence. "Don't worry, sockhead. After all, you've fought these guys before!"

"You know what? You're right Eddy!" Double d recollected. Ed and Eddy circled around the searchlight operator while Double d readied his shield. He threw a rock at the bokoblin, hitting it squarely in the head and shouted "HEY, uh . . . Eh-UGLY! Over here!" his knees began to shake as the creature neared him. The beast sized up the young challenger and prepared to attack . . . and promptly fell unconscious to the side.

"Thanks fellows." Double d sighed as the monster exploded into a pile of dust. Eddy and Ed stood over the heap, each holding the boko sticks they had used to vanquish said beast. "T'weren't nothing!" Ed responded as he stirred the ashes and knocked something hard across the concrete platform. "Whazzat?" Eddy asked as he followed the shining object in hopes that it would be a rupee. It turned out to be a necklace adorned with pearls, and in the center was a pink and yellow butterfly with a huge blue pearl in the center. "A girly necklace? WEAK!" Eddy shouted as he tossed the pendant over his shoulder in annoyance, he had his heart set on money. "That's actually a joy pendant," Double d corrected as he gathered up the feminine treasure "and if shown to the right person it's well worth finding."

"I bet you just want to give it to Tetra, right?" Eddy teased.

"Eddy, W-what on earth would give you that idea?" Double d burned a bright crimson. In truth he HAD thought about rewarding her somehow for all the help she'd been, but this seemed a tad out of place for a pirate captain.

"Who cares, let's just keep going. The sooner we save that brat, the sooner I can strike it rich!"

"I'm coming baby sister…" Ed silently promised as the others left the watchtower.

The three boys spent hours sneaking through the fortress; gathering things like maps and the occasional rupee and destroying other searchlight towers until they came to a room unlike all the others. It was a long, horseshoe-shaped hallway surrounding a drop-off. Between one end of the hallway and the other was a large door, which according to the map and Tetra's instructions, would lead to the room where Sarah would be. But getting there would not be easy, for spear wielding, half pig creatures known as moblins wandered the hall, snuffing the planks that the walkways comprise of occasionally to pick up the scent of intruders. "Great, now what?" Eddy moped as Ed slipped another barrel over his head. "I suppose that the only real way we can ever hope to survive this." Double d consented as he slipped into the wooden tube next to Ed and Eddy following suit. "Now this time, **listen to my plan,** ok Eddy,"

"Yeah, sure . . ."

"And Ed, I know how eager you are to save Sarah, but you must be very careful when sneaking around these creatures, or else all will be lost."

"I can do that, Double d" and with that the Eds slowly made their way across the hall. Despite Ed's putrid odor and the few times a moblin almost caught them moving, the boys made it across to the door, thanks to teamwork and patience. "Ok, where to next, sockhead?" Eddy asked as he threw the barrel off their shoulders and the three made their way outside. "Well, looks like we've got another guard to cross via barrel-"

"You've gotta be kiddin' me!" Eddy groaned but nonetheless climbed into the nearest barrel. The more they snuck around in these, it seemed, the better they became at doing so.

"Now what?" Eddy asked exhaustedly

"From here it appears we have to sidle along that ridge." Double d answered, pointing to a thin groove that jutted out enough for their feet to stand on. Double d took the lead, showing them the way he had taught himself back home, "Just don't look down . . ." things went well until Ed broke Double d's main rule and looked down. Beneath him was an unending pool of water, about three stories down. Needless to say, Ed panicked and jumped onto Eddy's head. "Ed You lummox!" Eddy staggered as Ed's weight threatened to throw them both off the ledge, "LET GO!!!" Double d grabbed the half Ed-Half Eddy monstrosity and somehow tugged it to safety on the other side. Double d leaned against a stonewall and panted over the strain of hoisting his friends away from possible doom. Eddy untangled himself from Ed and shot him a death-glare. And then the three did something they hadn't done since the pirates had come to Outset. They laughed. Not just a group chuckle or giggle, but a full-blown laugh fest that continued (and probably would've continued all night) until Tetra reminded them why they were here. Just like old times.

"Hey, it's our sword!" Eddy raced out to where the metal weapon lies in wait for its masters. He didn't notice the green bokoblin guarding the door. But the others did, "Ed-d-d-dy" Double d stammered as spikes larger than him sprung up between Eddy and his friends. "What the-" Eddy was nearly sliced in half by the bokoblin's sword. Eddy grabbed his own sword and slashed wildly at the beast, doing well for his first real fight. "Way to go, Eddy!" Double d commended as the spikes fell. Ed took the sword and ran into the door the bokoblin was guarding, "big brother is here, baby sister!"

"Ed, wait!" Double d and Eddy followed Ed's lead.

The door led into a large room, where a large wooden cage sat at one end and a ramp ran up the walls. In the cage sat three girls and an older woman. The woman looked to be about thirty and wore a sky-blue dress and sat in a corner of the cage shivering, possibly crying. Two of the girls looked like complete opposites, one appeared lavishly rich while the other was humble and poor. And the final girl was recognizable; she was dressed in pink and had her usual scowl on while trying to chew through the bars. "SARAH!" Ed shouted with joy as he ran to the cage. "Ed? What're you guys doing here?"

"We're here to save your sorry butt!" Eddy answered as Ed tried to pull the door open. That's when the flapping started, "Eddy," Double d began "Do you hear that?"

"What?" that's when the Helmroc King appeared! Before

Any of the Eds could react; the three were in its giant beak. "Hey, hey!" Eddy objected, "Put me down! I hate birds…"

The giant bird carried the boys to the largest parapet on the fortress, which was topped by half of a ship. Standing on a sort of deck was a tall, stocky man. His skin was an unhealthy gray, and his hair and beard burned a light scarlet. He was dressed in the darkest and most horrible clothes possible. This was presumably the bird's master and the ringleader of the fortress. He gestured to the Helmroc king with a sidelong nod, and the bird tossed the Eds into the night.


	4. The Red boat and the green pain

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" The three spiraled over the ocean, hanging on to each other. "MOMMY!" Eddy whimpered as he peeled away from the group and crashed into the water. "EDDY!" Ed shouted letting go to help his friend. Double d flew end over end before landing hard on the water.

The last thing he remembered was the red boat with a lion figurehead pulling up beside him, and being pulled onto the small craft. "M-my friends . . ." He stuttered, coughing up water, "You must find my friends . . ."

"Don't worry, I will do this." A voice answered. Funny, it almost seemed that the figurehead said it. _But that's crazy!_ He thought _how could a boat talk? I must be dreaming or hallucinating, I just need some sleep . . ._

"Ed, Eddy," a gruff mysterious voice called "Wake up!"

"Five more minutes, mommie!" Ed responded sleepily opening his eyes for a moment to see sunlight and promptly closing them.

"PULL YOURSELVES TOGETHER, BOYS!"

"Huh," Eddy replied as he, Double d and Ed awoke and detangled themselves from each other. They were on the deck of a small boat resting in a cove, the same one Double d remembered from his dream. "Well, have you three come to your senses?" the mysterious voice asked.

"Wha- who said that?" Eddy asked, looking every direction.

"It is the spirit of the cove!" Ed speculated in terror.

"Oh, hush now Ed!" Double d reassured him "hello, is anyone there?"

"You're surprisingly dull-witted," answered . . . the Boat? Sure enough the figurehead turned around and looked at the three stunned boys with patient eyes. "AH!" Eddy responded by falling flat on his back "Have mercy!" he desperately called. The boat laughed at this, "Did I startle you Eddy?" it responded

"How did you know our names?" Double d questioned as he eyed the boat curiously, "And, how precisely are you talking?"

"I have followed you from the forsaken fortress, my name is **the king of red lions,** do not fear, I am not your enemy."

Eddy got back up and tried to act nonchalant "so yeah, thanks for saving us, and stuff." He mumbled.

"Naturally, I wish to help!"

"Oh, can you help me save my sister?" Ed asked enthusiastically.

"Indeed, yet such a bold attempt was fool-hardy!"

"Sheesh, at least we tried . . ." Eddy grumbled.

"I suppose you saw him" the king of red lions continued "the man with an aura as dark as a shadow commanding that bird?"

"Come to think of it," Double d remembered, "I do remember seeing a man like that before we were tossed."

"His name is . . . Gannon . . ."

"What's so special about this 'GANNON' guy?" Eddy asked doubtfully.

"I'm glad you asked," the king of red lions began to explain, "he was the one who obtained the power of the gods and attempted to cover the land in darkness, but he was ultimately sealed away by the very power he hoped to command. He was the emperor of darkness from the ancient legend."

"But wait, if what you say is true, why has he escaped?" Double d asked.

"This I do not know, but what is apparent is the world is now threatened by his dark presence yet again."

"This is worse than I thought . . ." Double d whispered.

"Tell me Ed, do you still wish to save your sister from him?" the boat asked.

"I must save Sarah! If I don't, Jimmy will tell mom and mom will-"

"Ed, SHUT UP!" Eddy begged covering Ed's still mumbling mouth.

"And will you do anything to save her?"

Ed nodded, still in Eddy's grasp.

"Very well, then. And what of you two?" he addressed Double d and Eddy.

"As a friend I gave my word that I would help save Sarah, and nothing would make me break that promise!" Double d promised. The three turned to Eddy, who shot back a half-guilty look, "Well, what the heck? I've gotta bone to pick with that overgrown seagull anyhow!" he responded

"I love seagulls, guys!" Ed remarked with honesty.

"I see," The king of red lions responded, "in that case I shall guide you three as we go forward, advising you on what you should do and where you must go."

"Like a mentor?" Double d asked, remembering Sturgeon.

"Yes, essentially. Like a mentor. Gannon cannot be defeated by human hands, let alone the hands of three young boys like you."

"Great, just one more person who thinks we're losers!" Eddy ranted.

"I didn't say that, what I mean to say is that you must go through much toil and hardship before you can wield the power to defeat Gannon."

"Well then, the sooner we get going, the sooner we pummel this creep!" Eddy suggested.

"But before the journey of a thousand miles, one must take the first step."

"And the first step is?" Double d asked

"Well . . . this is rather embarrassing, I possess no sail." The boat answered sheepishly staring at the water.

"YOU DON"T HAVE A SAIL?" Eddy gaped, "Now what?"

"However, I was able to bring you east of the Forsaken Fortress's evil gaze. This is a town of merchants who deal in a wide variety of goods-"

"Wait a sec," Eddy interrupted, "Where are we anyhow?"

"You may have heard of this island, it's called Windfall."

"YOU'RE KIDDING!" Eddy leapt from the boat and breathed in heavily, taking in the scent of the island

"Double d is he quite alright?" the boat asked as Eddy quivered in anticipation. "He's fine. He has a nose for money, says it runs in his family." Just then Eddy leapt into the air and grabbed his age-old partners in crime, pulling them onto shore, "C'mon boys, Its RUPEE TIME!"

"But Eddy, remember the sail!" Double d reminded him, while Ed laughed foolishly.

At first Eddy dragged his friends across the lush green island and into the strange new village, but eventually Eddy took the lead in searching for money and within seconds he was gone. The other two Eds searched high and low looking for a sail, but for a while their efforts seemed useless. "L-let's rest a moment, Ed" Double d collapsed in front of a near barren stall, where a short man in a parka stood diligently. "Might I help you two?" The man asked kindly. "Why yes, Mr. . . .uh?" Double d floundered,

"Zunari, they call me Zunari." The man replied

"We need to purchase a sail, would you happen to know where-"

"Oh, that! I have that!" The shopkeeper answered, "I'll gladly sell it to you for, say, 80 rupees?"

Double d fished through his pockets, only to remember Eddy took his wallet. "Ed, do you have any money?" he sheepishly asked. "Gotcha' Double d!" Ed responded, pulling out perhaps the dirtiest rupee in existence. It was dripping with gravy, and pocket lint clung to its usually shining surface. Double d, a known germophobe, turned yellow at the sight of it; regardless Zunari polished the goo and debris off with his sleeve. It turned out to be a purple rupee, only worth fifty rupees, "Hm, thirty more should cover it." Just then Eddy arrived, Double d's wallet full to the brim with rupees. "Look fellas, I was right! This island is LOADED!" He cheered. Before Eddy could object, Double d reached in and took out thirty rupees to pay the full amount. "Thank-you!" Zunari looked truly humble, "Now I can afford to open my own store, you boys are life-savers!"

"T' weren't nothing!" Ed responded as Eddy gathered up the sail and the three left.

"Well, since it sounds like a hard journey is ahead of us, I suppose we should take our time in restocking supplies and such," Double d reasoned as the three stood in the middle of what appeared to be the town square, "We'll meet back here in an hour, agreed?"

"I can do that, Double d!" Ed answered, and raced off in his unique running style.

"And I'm off to get some jawbreakers!" Eddy announced as he left for the café over Zunari's shop. Jawbreakers had been a coveted treat on Outset; very few kids could afford them. But those who were friends with Kevin got them for free. This meant the Eds had almost never gotten a chance to eat one, and Eddy in particular adored them. Gladly would he saw off his own arm or leave his friends in danger for the sake of these sugary orbs. Sweet dreams were made of these . . . but reality has a way of souring dreams. He entered the café and scanned the room for a jar, the kind that would hold jawbreakers, when he saw a sight that almost stopped his heart. Sitting at the nearest possible were a pair of children his age. One was a blonde girl with short hair and good fashion sense. The other was a big-chinned boy with a red baseball cap. "KEVIN?" Eddy Gaped as the other boy recognized him "Eddy?" the other boy looked just as surprised for a moment before their age-old rivalry flared up yet again.

"SHOVEL CHIN!" Eddy accused, Kevin glared at him.

"DORK!"

Double d, unaware of Eddy's discovery, sat near the docks of Windfall with Sturgeon's journal on his lap. _Now let's see, where does this begin?_ He opened the book and flipped past the table of contents to find the legend of the hero, in such detail not many had known. It spoke of Gorons, mysterious men made of rock, and Zoras, mermaids of sorts. It spoke of a land, beyond imagination to many on the great sea, from fiery death mountain, to the vast Gerudo desert, to dense Kokiri forest, and every inch of field and all the knolls in between. At first it was hard for a boy used to endless sea to comprehend such a place. But after the ancient legend had been retold in such grand detail, the book continued on to explain the story of Orca and Sturgeon, how they traveled the sea and how Sturgeon learned all that the first chapter explained from wandering merchants and exploration. Though his chapters were short, they were full of adventure and ended right where the story began, on Outset. For a long while, (Double d lost track of time while writing) he filled the next available pages with his own story, sparing not even the slightest detail. He had just finished describing the Helmroc king tossing the Eds across the ocean when the strangest possible thing happened.

"Tingle, Tingle! Kaloo-LIMPAH!" Cried the weirdest little man imaginable. If Niko merely looked like a rat, then this man WAS a rat, with a goatee. He wore a green one-piece suit that covered him from the top of his head to his small feet with red underwear . . . on the outside, and Around his neck hung a pocket watch, stuck at four o' clock. He ran down the docks with several men chasing him down it, shouting to Double d "STOP THAT MANIAC!" at first all he could do is stare at the odd spectacle, but by the time he decided stopping him would be helpful, it was too late. He had blown up a balloon to about his size, and giving the laws of physics the proverbial middle finger, he flew away on it.

"Dangit! He got away." The apparent leader said. He was dressed in yellow and had the longest beard Double d had ever seen. "Um, excuse me," he squeaked, "But who on earth was that?"

"They call him Tingle." The second man in the group announced, who looked about as poor and downtrodden as they come.

"He's a dirty thief!" the leader noted, "He stole my latest Picto box model."

"One thing I abhor is theft." The third man, who looked very rich, announced, "Plus, he's really, REALLY annoying!"

"That sounds terrible!" Double d agreed, "I thoroughly trust the authorities to catch him."

"They did." The poor man answered, "Some idiot must've freed him!" the word 'idiot' made Double d wince, he spoke up "Let's say I knew said idiot, what would you do to him,"

The pictograph-lover answered, "May the gods have mercy on him . . ."

_Oh my,_ "well, I really should, um, find my friend. Then maybe we can help!" Double d responded.

_Ed? What on earth have you gotten yourself into?"_

The two enemies stared each other down intensely until the girl broke the death stare, "EDDY?" she stared in disbelief, the two boys stared back, each in their own form of shock, "Nazz?"

"Dude, it's been, like forever!" Nazz pulled Eddy into a simple hug, the kind you give your little brother if you haven't seen him in a while.

"So spill! What's happened on Outset since we left?"

"Well, for starters, Johnny's gone." Eddy started explaining, "Double d and Ed are here with me, and pretty much everyone else but Sarah are safe on Outset."

"What's up with Ed's sis?" Kevin asked, a little angry at the attention Eddy was getting from Nazz.

"Your never gonna believe this, yesterday this huge bird swooped outta the sky and kidnapped her!"

"NO WAY! That's terrible!" Nazz exclaimed

"Pathetic," Kevin grumbled, not believing one word of Eddy's story.

"Way, but we're on a daring quest to save her from the jaws of evil!"

"BALONEY!" Kevin interrupted, this time loud enough for Nazz and Eddy to hear him.

"Kevin!?!" Nazz interjected in disbelief.

"Oh, come on Nazz! He's still the lying twerp I remember from when we left." The word 'we' stung at Eddy. Deep down he knew, even though he'd never admitted it to himself: Nazz was, and always will be, Kevin's girl. And everyone else on the island now knew that too, knew it or denied it. Sure, Nazz had been deceivingly kind to all of them, but they day she left proved it, none of them were worthy of the greatness that was she. Not Eddy, not Double d, nor Johnny, and certainly not Ed! She'd left with Kevin, and that was that. Though it appeared Ed, and to some extent Johnny (he'd never been normal in the first place.) had healed, Eddy and Double d both privately thought about this pain often. Though it hurt to think about being left behind in favor of his mortal enemy, he would never let Kevin accuse him of lying the one time he'd told the truth, "I'M NOT LYING!"

"Give it up, Dorky! Sarah's probably fine, and I bet seventy rupees those other dorks are all back on Outse-" Suddenly the door to the café burst open and Double d raced over to where Eddy was standing "Eddy, come quickly, Ed's in trouble!" Eddy didn't hear this, he read Kevin's face: shock.

"HA! Told Ya I wasn't lying!"

"No time!" Double d interjected, "C'mon!"

"Wait a sec, Kevin owes me money!" Nazz and Kevin were left to their empty table. "Why didn't you believe Eddy?" Nazz questioned him harshly.

"A c'mon, Nazz!" he defended himself, "You remember how those dorks used to scam rupees clean off us, and in my opinion dorks don't change."

"And you don't either!" Nazz retorted as she lead Kevin out to help Ed.

The two boys, followed by Nazz and Kevin, followed Ed's telltale trail of gravy to a door on the far side of town. Inside, the three men from before were standing on the other side of a wooden cell, glaring down at something. And as they got closer, sure enough, it was Ed. . . At least, it was his lower half.

"Goodness, gracious, ED!" Double d kneeled beside his trapped friend.

"Guys?" Ed asked from within the wall, "Can you help me out, I am stuck!"

"Oh, no!" the pictograph lover shouted, "This kid's in a lotto trouble, we're fixin' on leaving him here!"

"YEAH!" the other two men agreed.

"Gentlemen, please!" Double d panted as his feeble arms strained to free his friend. "Let's not behave like savages!"

"Yeah, give 'em a break!" Eddy agreed, but certainly didn't rush to help.

"Either Tingle must pay the punishment, or he will!" the rich man announced.

"Oh, that silly man who was stuck in here gave me a map to his house! We will find him and ask him to help us find this Bad Tingle-man!" Ed's muffled reply came just as Double d's hand's slipped and he crashed onto the stone floor.

"Well, if that's the case," the men grabbed Ed where Double d slipped and pulled the boy free," You better start telling us all you know about Tingle, young man." As the old pictograph lover questioned Ed, no one noticed Eddy slipping in to the same hole.

Eddy crawled along the intricate tunnels Ed had been caught in; thinking as he did so, _**there's gotta be some treasure in here somewhere!**_ After crawling through several Rupee lined pathways, he came upon a small room, edged with skulls and tablets. The tablets were written by Tingle, explaining his actions and acting as a written confession. But Eddy didn't bother to read them, nor was he scared of the skull collection. All that concerned him was the small chest in the center of the room, on a raised platform. "Jackpot!" Eddy exclaimed as he threw the lid off and searched its dusty contents. He didn't get far though, as the box held only one item: a Picto box. _**That's it?**_ Eddy thought as he ran his hands along the inside, conjuring up nothing but cobwebs, _**you'd think a guy in jail would have a larger stash!**_ Regardless, he took the camera-like object and exited the way he came.

Meanwhile Ed told the others about how Tingle had begged Ed to free him and Ed, having the perfect combination of unconditional kindness and blatant stupidity, complied. "And he gave me a little game boy advance, too!" Ed laughed as he pulled out the green, diamond-shaped piece of plastic and started pushing random buttons. "Now calling Tingle!" the little box chimed, and sure enough Tingle's face appeared on the screen. The pictograph lover grabbed the 'Tingle tuner' from Ed's hands and shouted into it, visibly horrifying the thirty five year old lunatic on the other end, "TINGLE, WE'RE GONNA CATCH YOU AND WHEN WE DO, YOU'RE GONNA BE SORRY!"

"Uh, well, um!" Tingle whimpered like a girl before grabbing a pink cloth-like substance and hid behind it "pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!" he announced, pulling more cloth to cover himself, in the process pulling another man just like him into frame. Apparently the cloth was his clothes, and he seemed annoyed that Tingle was using his suit as a disguise, "Tingle? LET GO!" he shouted to the queer counterpart as he struggled to free himself.

"Quit it Ankle!" Tingle hissed behind him. "You're giving away my position!"

Another man dressed in another white suit like Tingle's but without his goatee, stepped into frame and mouthed the phrase "Call the police!" Tingle pushed him out of the way and exclaimed, "You don't get to be in this vid, David Jr!"

"Tingle," Double d softly interjected, "Wouldn't it be easier if you just turned yourself in?"

"No way! You'll have to catch me first! Tingle over and out." And with that the screen turned black.

"That creep!" the three men wailed. Then they turned their attention to Ed, whose eyes had panned out the way they usually do when he's not thinking. "Ed," the Pictograph lover sighed, "I truly am sorry that we wanted to leave you there, it's just the world's been so crazy these days . . . we behaved irrationally."

"Yeah," the other two men agreed, "First our daughters were kidnapped by that giant bird, then Tingle-"

"WAIT A SEC!" Double d interrupted, "Did you say a giant bird kidnapped you daughters!"

"Yes," the rich man sighed sadly, "and ever since then we've been an emotional wreck! I'd give anything to see my precious Mila again."

"At least you have something TO give." The poor man answered, "Me and Maggie have been poor since day one! And I'll probably never see her again, as I cannot afford rescuers. Alas to be impoverished and homeless, the misery, the suffering, the-"

"WE GET IT, YOU'RE POOR!" Eddy announced freeing himself from the wall, his prize bulging in his pockets. "Eddy, what's that?" Double d asked, as he got closer, Meanwhile Ed addressed the two fathers "Do not worry, I too have a sibling trapped on the accursed island of evil, and I: Ed, monster hunter, shall rescue her and your children, no charge!"

"Y-You'd really do that, after we wanted to keep you here?" Maggie's father asked, amazed at Ed's unending kindness.

"Quack!" Ed announced, using it for a yes.

"We truly have misjudged you, I hope one day you may forgive us." Mila's father answered.

Meanwhile, Eddy pulled the camera-like device out of his pocket, " I swiped it Offa Tingle's stash." He answered, showing Double d the Picto box. The Pictograph lover's eyes widened as he took it and examined it. "Why, this is the Picto box Tingle stole! Thank-you Eddy!" Eddy just shrugged his shoulders at this; to him it didn't really matter. The Pictograph lover overheard Ed's valiant offer of a free rescue mission and thought for a second before making his decision. "I'll tell you what," the man said, "My name is Lenzo, and I am a world renowned Pictographer, and as for payment for saving the young girls of this island and capturing Tingle, I'll let you keep that Picto box!"

"Sweet!" Eddy announced taking back the device.

"Thank-you Lenzo." Double d said on behalf of his greedy friend. And thusly the three Eds left the jail cell, leaving the grown men to conspire on the fate of Tingle when he's caught.

As the three left the jail they were met with a compassionate Nazz and indifferent Kevin. "Hey dudes! Is it true that Sarah's been kidnapped and you guy's are gonna rescue her?" she asked, already knowing what the answer would be. "It would seem that's the case." Double d answered. Funny, the usual blushing and stuttering that plagued his speech whenever Nazz was around seemed to be cured . . . But what could that mean, he wondered as Eddy fiendishly grinned at Kevin, "SO PAY UP, SUCKER!" He laughed as Kevin angrily tossed several rupees at Eddy and stormed off. Nazz let him be, a reunion like this doesn't happen every day. "So is there anything I can do to help?" She asked, hoping to at least play some role in helping to rescue Sarah. "Well, not at the moment," Double d responded, "We've just purchased a sail for our boat and . . . Good lord, WHAT TIME IS IT? HOW LONG HAVE WE BEEN HERE!?!" as his friend panicked, Ed removed his shoe and swirled the liquid inside it, probably a mixture of foot sweat and gravy; taking a big whiff of the mix, and almost making Double d puke from his particular method of telling time, he announced "one hour and twenty-five minutes!"

"Oh dear oh dear oh dear!" Double d chanted as he scuttled off with Eddy and Ed following to where the king of red lions waited, "Sorry Nazz, we must be going, people to save, places to go!"

"Don't worry, dude! I totally understand!" She replied

"See ya!" Eddy called as they disappeared behind a rock

"Don't forget to write!" Ed begged as they met back up with their boat.

The king of red lions let out another yawn, the twenty-seventh to be precise. _Where are those three?_ He thought as the waves rocked him a bit_ Send them off to find a sail and it takes them over an hour to do it! _ Finally the three came into the cove and Double d produced the sail. "S-sorry, your majesty! Ed got stuck and. . . It's a long story."

"No matter," the boat answered, "Come. I shall teach you the art of sailing!" Ed suddenly got excited and started chanting, "YAY! We're going on a boat, we're going on a boat!" endlessly until Eddy shut him up with a roundhouse kick. The three then got into the boat in their own fashion; Eddy took a place of leadership on the top of the figurehead between it's golden horns, Ed rigged up the sails to the mast and leaned against it while Double d sat in the back, near the rudder. "Now it's all pretty simple," The boat began, trying to ignore Eddy's place on his head, "Obviously the wind will fill the sails and carry us on our way and you can change direction and speed by turning the rudder."

"That all sounds simple enough to remember." Double d agreed as he grabbed hold of the rudder.

"One more thing," The king of red lions mentioned before Ed lowered the sails for the first time, "Take this **sea chart**, it will help guide you while out here. I've already marked the first destination." he said handing it to Double d, which he stashed in Sturgeon's book.

"Onward seafarers!" Eddy shouted as the western wind pulled them towards their first real test . . . Dragon Roost Island.


	5. Eat a peach or maybe a pearl

"Come on guys, you know the words! Thirty-seven bottles of gravy on the wall, thirty-seven bottles of gravy!" Ed began singing this song not long after they left windfall (Yes, he DID start on ninety-nine!) and the king of red lions and Double d could tolerate it, but Eddy had had enough, "Ed! Shut up before I get a hernia!" just then they saw it: a mountainous island that reached into the sky and cast an impressive shadow over the ocean. Around it was a ring of smoke, like a nest, that hovered at over a thousand feet. The king of red lions suddenly spoke, "There, on the horizon, Do you see it?"

"Well, duh!" Eddy indignantly responded, "That thing only takes up half the ocean!"

"That 'thing'" the boat announced, "Is **Dragon Roost Island**. That's our destination!" the boat sailed into a small bay near the more appealing beach of the island and the Eds climbed out onto the sand, well Except for Ed: He kind of stumbled out of the boat and fell into the seawater face-first. "High atop this island's peak lives **the spirit of the skies** . . . a great Dragon by the name of **Valoo.**" The king of red lions announced

"Cool!" Ed gazed up to the peak of the island, hoping to see said creature.

"Big deal!" Eddy mumbled, "So what are we here for?"

"You must go see this Dragon and request from him a jewel called **Din's pearl**."

"Oh great! More girly jewelry!"

"It's not just girly jewelry; it's essential to our journey. The people on this island, **the Rito tribe**, will assist you in this." Eddy and Ed started to depart, but the boat stopped them, "I almost forgot, wait one moment." In its mouth lay a pure-white conductor's baton, "This is the **wind waker. **In ancient times, people would use this baton to play music in prayer to the gods."

"Interesting," Double d picked up the baton and examined it.

"In those days, simply using it allowed one to borrow the power of the gods, but I do not know if it still works."

"Oh, oh! Can I try?" Ed asked hopping around manically.

"Why not?" Double d handed Ed the wind waker and he swung it randomly, playing a song no one recognized. (Inside Ed's mind) _ooh Eee ooh ahah ting tang Walla Walla Bing bang! Ooh Eee ooh ahah ting tang Walla Walla Bing baaaang!"_ {Note: this was the tune Ed played that no one could recognize. I was listening to it while writing this part . . . Shut up.} "Well, apparently it works." The boat mumbled, "That was 6/4th time. Double d, why don't you try playing in 4/4th time?"

"Well, alright!" he took the baton and played the first notes of "ode to joy". "Yawn." Grumbled Eddy, thinking all this music stuff was lame. "Ok, Eddy. Try playing in 3/4th time." Eddy dimly played taps on the magic baton.

"Good. Remember well how to use it, it might come in handy at a later time."

"Great, thanks!" Eddy quickly responded, grabbing his two friends, "Let's go boys!" and with that they left their tiny red boat bobbing in the bay.

The three scrambled across the island, looking for a way to climb higher, but every method seemed useless. Eddy finally collapsed in front of a shallow pool of water, "We're never getting' up there." He panted as Ed picked up something big and blue that was growing on the ground near Eddy. "Hey guys! Can I build a birdhouse with this?" Double d gaped in horror at what Ed was holding, "Ed, get rid of that bomb flower IMMEDIATELY!" Ed tossed the explosive plant at a large rock nearby, shattering it into pebbles. Double d brightened up when he saw the clear path ahead, "Eddy that's it! We'll use bomb flowers to traverse the island!"

The boys threw bomb flowers at every obstacle, and Eddy collected ten rupees a rock. Along the way they passed a platform with several musicians standing on it playing lively Spanish-sounding music on string instruments like mandolins and violins. The Eds stopped for a moment to listen, "You guys are good!" Eddy commented when the song was finished. "Thanks." Responded the violin player, "We are the band of Yoshihiro Arita, and that was the traditional song of Dragon Roost island." Then the musicians began playing again and the three moved on. Soon they were on the path to the Rito tribe. The first face they saw was a familiar one, and Ed recognized it immediately. "Mr. Quill birdie man!" he ran up and gave the Rito another painful hug! "Ed... I wish . . . you wouldn't . . . Do that!" he gasped out the best he could before Ed let go. "I must say, you three travel far without wings."

"We certainly do amazing things when we work together as a team." Double d responded.

"And what about Sarah, is she . . ." the three looked away, Ed almost looked ready to cry, Eddy feebly tried to speak before the kind postman stopped him, "Is that so," he responded reading their silence "Don't worry too much, Sarah's a tough girl, I'm sure she'll hang in there."

"Quill, would you happen to know about something called Din's pearl?" Double d asked with optimism.

"I know about it, but you'll have to speak with our **chieftain** and his son if you want to see it." Quill responded.

"Why his son?" Eddy probed in confusion.

"Well, his son has it."

"Of course he does…" Eddy flatly mumbled, "Whatever, sure we'd like to see 'um!"

"It's settled then!" Quill announced happily spreading his arm-like wings, "I'll fly ahead and let everyone know you're coming." With that the Ed's were left to the near-by door into the village.

The Rito village was basically a two-leveled cave within the mountain that acted for the most part as a post-office. As the Eds stepped into the room, before them stood several Rito men speaking to one another in the center of the room, one was dressed in red and looked particularly important, asked another one, who was hovering a few feet off the floor "Well? Have you discovered the cause of the Great Valoo's anger?" The other Rito shook his head and ascended as the three boys stepped forward, "Um, excuse me," Double d ventured as the Ritos noticed the boy's presence.

"Ah, so you are the Eds, are you?" the important looking Rito asked.

"That's us!" Eddy responded poking his chest with his thumb on the word "us".

"Quill has told me all about you three. A troubling tale, indeed . . ." The Rito replied.

"Sir, we need to speak to the chieftain, as soon as possible." Double d requested.

"Then look no further!" the Rito chieftain laughed before becoming serious again, "I insist you let us know what we can do to help. We'll do anything in our power to assist you."

"Man, this is gonna be easy!" Eddy whispered to Double d and Ed before the chieftain started speaking again. "However, in the meantime, we have a problem of our own to deal with . . ."

"Or not!" Eddy grumbled as Quill explained further, "When you arrived on this island, did you notice the raging **dragon** perched atop the mountain?"

"Why yes," Double d answered, "Valoo, right?"

"Yes, you're a smart lad!" The chieftain began to explain further, "As you can see, we of the Rito tribe are profoundly connected to the sky. We make our livings on the airways."

"We make our living on dead fishies!" Ed announced as Double d and Quill winced, but the chieftain seemed to take no notice as he continued his tale, "We do so by the graces of the sky spirit, Valoo. When a Rito reaches adulthood, he or she journeys to the top of Dragon Roost to receive a scale from the great dragon. It is this scale that enables the Rito to grow his or her wings."

"Ooh, ooh!" Ed hopped around with his hand raised, "I want a magic scale to fly with too!"

"Unfortunately, the scales only work on Rito natives." The Rito leader corrected, "Besides, as of late the once-gentle Valoo has grown too violent and unpredictable for even us to approach him."

"Aww." Ed groaned.

"If this continues, the fledglings who are of age will never be able to receive their scales and will remain wingless."

"But that would mean," Double d reasoned and the chieftain answered, "Yes. Soon our very way of life will be threatened. As chieftain of the Rito, my first responsibility is to solve this problem. My apologies, but I must ask you to wait for our assistance until this is done."

"We understand sir, thanks for the consideration thus far." Double d spoke on behalf of Eddy and Ed. Quill turned to the chieftain and asked, "Chieftain, what do you think of consulting the Eds with regards to your son, **prince Komali**? As you can see, the Eds are gallant young men. I feel certain that prince Komali would open his heart to them and speak freely of his fears and worries."

"Double d, are we really gallon young men?" Ed asked

"No Ed, he said 'Gallant' not gallon." Double d answered as the chieftain thought it over. "Let me be direct." The leader finally responded, "My son Komali is of the age to earn his wings . . . Yet . . . he is weak, in some ways . . . and in light of the current situation, he might just give up on ever getting them . . . "

"Why, that's terrible!" Double d sympathized with the bird king.

"Will you share some of your courage with him?" the worried father asked, and Eddy responded, "No sweat! He'll be a real man when we're through with him!"

"Thank-you. We shall do our best to solve our problem as quickly as possible, so that we may better help you with yours." The leader of the Rito tribe assured them. "I have something I wish for you to give to my son. A young girl named **Medli **is holding it for me. Would you find her and take it?"

"Certainly." Double d responded, as the chieftain turned to leave, "I'm counting on you three." The Rito leader departed. Quill turned to Double d and handed him what appeared to be a fanny-pack, "Here, take this with you. Who knows, it might come in handy."

It turned out to be a delivery bag, the kind used for carrying letters and the like. "You should find Medli in one of the upper rooms."

"Is there anything else we can do to help?" Double d offered.

"No, we can handle Valoo ourselves. In the meantime, do your best to aid prince Komali." And with that Quill flew away.

The Eds climbed the stone ramp that wound its way up to the second floor. "Eddy, do you even know where we're going?" Double d warned as Eddy started to check the rooms on the second floor. "Have I ever steered us wrong?" He responded confidently. "Yes!" Double d reminded him as they stepped into a particular room where a young female Rito stood. Eddy quickly asked, "Hey, are you Medli?" she quickly recognized their description and announced, "Wow! You really DO have green clothes and a funny looking hat!"

"Stupid tradition!" Eddy mumbled.

"You must be the Eds. I'm an attendant to the great sky spirit, Valoo. My name is Medli. Well, to tell the truth, I'm not an attendant I'm still studying to be one."

"Um, yes," Double d interrupted, "This would indeed be an interesting conversation for another time and place, but right now-"

"Oh, what am I thinking?" She replied, "Here! This is from the chieftain. He wants you guys to deliver it straight to prince Komali" She handed them a well-written letter that Double d promptly stashed in his new Delivery bag. "The room in the back on the first floor is prince Komali's room." Medli instructed them, "When you meet him, please don't be offended by his demeanor."

"Trust me, he can't be that bad!" Eddy remembered the people and monsters he met in the past.

"We'll do our best." Double d promised as the three turned to leave. "Wait!" The young Rito stopped them, "Before you go, I have a small favor to ask of you . . ."

"If it involves making shoes or baking cookies then I'm out!" Eddy announced flatly. Medli laughed, "No, nothing like that. I was wondering if you could come to the entrance to **Dragon Roost Cavern **later?"

"Certainly, but what for?" Double d asked.

"I'll explain everything then." Was her cryptic reply as the three boys left the room.

The Eds followed Medli's instructions to Komali's room, which was placed in a secluded cove and blocked by a bird-shaped door. The Eds entered the room to find a young Rito boy, slightly shorter than Eddy, with red eyes and snow-white hair lying on a grass-canopy bed; in his hands was a large orange pearl, about the size of his head. Unfortunately, Ed mistook it for something far tastier . . . "JAWBREAKER!" he shouted, Grabbing the pearl from the stunned boy and stuffing the whole thing in his mouth. "Spit it out you heathen! SPIT IT OUT!" the poor child seemed ready to cry, and Eddy was laughing manically on the floor. "Ed, DROP IT!" Double d ordered holding out his hand. Ed, like an obedient puppy, let the bright orb roll off his tongue and into Double d's hands. "Guh, I'm sorry about that," he apologized, polishing the spit off the sphere with a rag, "Ed thought it was a jawbreaker, lovable oaf!" The Rito snatched the treasure from Double d, as it was now, for the most part, clean. "Do you realize that this was a gift from my deceased Grandmother?" the Rito boy asked angrily.

"Oh, my." Double d felt terrible, "I am so, SO Sorry!"

"AND," the lad continued, "That it's a treasure to this land, the legendary Din's pearl!"

"Wait a sec," Declared Eddy, getting up from the floor from his laugh-fest, "Then you're that prince guy, Komali!"

"Indeed I am! And when I tell my father what you've done- Double d pulled the letter out, "Actually, that's why we're here. We were sent by your father with this letter."

"A letter? From my father?" Komali set the pearl down on the bed to read his father's letter. "Oh, sure," he mumbled after reading it, "telling me to be brave is easy enough for him… it's not like he went through that horrible experience, it's not like HE still has to get a scale from Valoo!"

"Komali, I'm sure your father only wants what's best for you." Double d tried to comfort the prince.

"You guys are the Eds, right?" Komali suddenly asked.

"The one and only!" Eddy once again addressed.

"You're in this letter too, you know. Poking your noses into other people's business, you're nosey, aren't you?"

"Why I oughta…." Eddy mumbled as the prince continued. "Sorry, but I really don't feel like going to see Valoo right now. I mean, how am I supposed to get a scale from him when he's so upset?"

"We could get you a scale!" Ed offered despite the panicked look of his comrades.

"Are you saying YOU can calm Valoo down when not a single Rito native here can?" Komali asked with disbelief.

"Well, I s-suppose we could try." Double d offered without being too enthusiastic about meeting a dragon.

"Pssssh! That's just a big, fat lie!" the prince accused, "it's easy to say you can do anything! Bragging doesn't cost a thing!"

"But what if we actually could do it?" Double d offered.

"I'll tell you what: if you can find me someone who can get past all the obstacles on **Dragon Roost** to get to Valoo, THEN I'll listen to anything you say!"

"Deal!" Eddy agreed dragging the Eds out of Komali's room.

"But Eddy, we don't even know the way to Dragon Roost Cavern." Double d admitted as Eddy ran about every which-way. "I'm following my gut here!" he replied as they exited the village and entered an ashen yard that overlooked a blocked fountain. In the depression that housed the blocked spring stood Medli, next to a ramp. "Looks like I was right!" Double d gave him the usual look he gave Eddy when he let his ego get out of hand. The three ran to where a bridge probably stood and leapt from it, with Ed landing on his face and the others on their feet. "You guy's actually made it!" Medli happily replied.

"We pride ourselves on service!" Eddy joked.

"I'm really sorry about bringing you to such a dangerous place. I had to! I wouldn't have asked if I didn't need help desperately."

Double d gave the falling ash an uneasy look, " what can we do to help you?"

"You see this place?" Medli asked rhetorically, "There used to be a spring here, surrounded by a beautiful pond . . . it was peaceful and lovely. But then great Valoo became angry and in his rage he shook the mountain and this boulder crashed down, plugging the spring. You can see the result."

"So you want us to unplug the spring?" Eddy asked.

"If I knew how I would. But tell me, how was prince Komali."

"Everything went fine, until Ed tried to Eat Din's pearl!" Eddy chuckled.

"But it looked like a jawbreaker!" Ed sobbed.

"Other than that," Double d explained, "He's still apprehensive on seeing Valoo."

"I may be partially to blame for the bad turn that prince Komali's taken" Medli confessed.

"What do you mean?" Double d asked.

"See, prince Komali's grandmother was the great Valoo's former attendant. She was an amazing woman. I was honored to have her as my teacher. She was kind and brave, and unsurpassed in her dealings in the great Valoo. I'm not yet worthy of being mentioned in the same breath as her."

"Come now, Medli." Double d explained in his reasoning tone, "Just because she passed on doesn't mean you're to blame for Komali's turn in mood."

"Yeah it's like my mom used to say:" Eddy began, "People live. People die. Circle of life, Eat your salad!"

"I guess, but if I possessed some of her strength, I'm sure prince Komali would've felt more secure. That's why I need your help. I want to go to the small shrine that's near the peak of Dragon Roost, but that ledge is so high."

"But, you can fly . . ." Double pointed out.

"I know, it's just the wind is so hostile, it's hard to take off. If someone could toss me in the right direction-"

"Oh I can do that!" Ed shouted as he picked up Medli and ran towards the ramp, but he threw her at the wrong time.

"Ed, No! The wind-" Medli shouted as she hit the stone wall. "Medli, are you alright?!?" Double d asked as he and the others ran to where she was slumped against the stone. "Double d, Eddy, ED?" She asked, trying to shake off the dizziness, "When did you all become triplets?"

"Well, that could've been far worse," Double d addressed Ed, "This time, let's take the wind into consideration!"

"Got'cha Double d!" he announced, once again picking up Medli, who had turned back to normal. Double d held up his finger, testing the wind, and when it blew in the right direction, "GO!" Medli was tossed from the ramp and landed successfully on the other side. "Thank-you" she called down to the three boys, "From here I can climb to the top of the island and meet with Valoo."

"Are you sure the way is safe?" Double d asked with every right to be concerned.

"Don't worry," Medli responded, "I'll be fine! Look, if anything happens to me, please look after prince Komali."

"Ok." The three responded.

"This is all I have to give you," Medli admitted, producing a reward, "I know it's not much, but please take it!" She tossed a glass bottle to them, and Double d barely caught it. Medli added one more thing, "Don't tell anyone I'm up here, ok!"

"Our lips are sealed!" Eddy promised as Medli made her way onward.

"Now what?" Double d asked, still standing in the gorge.

"Heck, I don't know!" Eddy answered, "Let's scam some Rito's!"

"Oh, I have an idea!" Ed shouted as he grabbed the bottle from Double d and filled it with water from the plugged spring. He climbed the ladder-like broken bridge and poured the water on some wilted bomb-flowers. "What's he up to?" Eddy asked while the two stood in the depression, "Upsey-daisy!" Ed shouted as he picked up a plump bomb flower and tossed it at the giant rock; visibly frightening his friends, destroying it and flooding the gorge and rising up to where the Eds could reach the other side. "Ed, how did you know?" Double d asked bobbing in the water. "This much I know is true:" Ed started, "The gods blessed the broken bridge that gave me an idea!"

"Now if only they could give you a brain!" Eddy joked, "Ok, what's next?"

"Well, it would seem the only way to progress further would be to see what we can do for the sky spirit!" Double d announced climbing out of the water on the side near the cavern. "Oh great!" Eddy mumbled, "More danger!"

"Oh relax, it can't be that hard-" Double d started to say before he laid eyes on the pit of lava. "Oh My!" he mumbled. "THAT'S IT, I'M GOING HOME!" Eddy shouted turning around. "Nonsense." Double d barked, "We just need to find a way across."

"If only we could fly!" Eddy Sarcastically wished.

"Alley-oop!" Ed shouted tossing another bomb flower into the hands of the statues that stood beside the lava, and with a loud "Kaboom!" they were lying face-down in the lava, "C'mon guys!" Ed called, crossing the impromptu bridge, "I want to meet the magical Dragon!"

"After you, Eddy!" Double d held out his hand smugly.

"Whatever!" Eddy grumbled as he and Double d crossed the lava pit into the Cavern.

The three entered a ceremonial-looking room illuminated by two bowls of fire. At the back of the room sat three statues that looked, to Double d at least, like gorons. The wall behind them had a mural of two dragons on it, but from what they could see, there was no way to continue on further. "Can we go home NOW?" Eddy asked in a frustrated tone. Double d shook his head as he pointed to Ed, who had moved the blocks and provided a path to the next room, which held two angry-looking Bokoblins that Ed pummeled relentlessly. When the fight was over, the Ed's looked to the near-by door, only to find that it was locked. "What do we do now?" Ed asked as Double d picked up a boko stick and lit it on fire with a nearby torch, "Well if that door is locked, we must find a key." Double d and the others circled around the dark room, searching for the path onward. Without realizing it, he lit two torches at the far end of the room. Suddenly the space between the torches began to glow, until a chest appeared, in it was the key they were looking for. "Despite that being sheer luck," Double d commented unlocking the door, "From now on we'll need to work together. Ed, we'll need your strength."

"Okey-dokey!" Ed replied wrenching the door open.

"Eddy, you'll lend us your cunning,"

"Tell me something I don't know!" Eddy gloated

"And my intelligence will be my gift." And with that the three stepped into a world of lava.

From there the Eds faced the dangers of Dragon Roost Cavern; lava and monsters. It seemed every room contained a puzzle which Double d would flawlessly solve, every room would contain a monster that Ed would annihilate, and every room had hidden dangers that Eddy often found first. The puzzles included anything imaginable: bombs, keys, fire, pressure, and faith. And the monsters were the vilest sorts: bokoblins in every color, bat-like keese, lava-proof centipedes known as magtails, and purple birds nearly as tall as Ed; kargoroks. But Eddy proved most useful, while burning his tookus on lava and lifting vases that bokoblins would hide in, he reminded them all that this wasn't a game. About halfway through their ordeal they made it to the top of the mountain.

"Are we THERE yet?" Eddy asked impatiently, rubbing his hindquarters after their third encounter with lava. "According to the map," Double d responded as he and Eddy started climbing a nearby staircase, "We're very close to the shrine." As Ed gingerly stepped onto the stone steps, they began to crumble. "RUN AWAY!" the three shouted as they ran up the disintegrating path. Just as the last step fell, Ed reached the top with the others. "This is not good!" Double d mumbled. As he looked down to where the stairs once were, now a stair-shaped hole in the clouds revealed the vast ocean. "Yeah, and Ed's parents can't even bring them back!" Eddy joked referring to an unusual punishment Ed would often serve on behalf of Sarah. "No problem, guys!" Ed shouted, pulling out the Tingle tuner, "Mr. Silly man can get us out of here!" after hitting more buttons on the tool Tingle appeared on screen. "Tingle here!" The odd little man answered. "Tingle," Double d calmly addressed, not forgetting his promise to arrest this creep, "We need some way to traverse this chasm, perhaps your balloon-"

"If you want to use the Tingle balloon, you'll have to pay me thirty rupees,' the greedy fairy-man replied, somehow holding his hand out through the screen for money.

"No way, I'll wait for the movie!" Eddy announced, not wanting to spend even a penny of his hard-earned cash on a wimpy balloon.

"Eddy!" Double d growled as he fished through his wallet, but all he could find were twenty-seven rupees.

"Sorry, no balloon for you!" Tingle retorted, taking his money anyway.

"WHY YOU LITTLE!" Eddy shouted as he took the game boy-like device from Ed and threw it spiraling off the mountain where it sank in the waters below.

"I guess the only way we can go is up." Eddy deduced pointing to the last three steps remaining. "HELP!" someone shouted from the very top. "Hurry Eddy!" Double d shouted as he and Ed ran to the voice. They entered an arena-like area with a cage at the back of it. Inside the cage was Medli, guarded by two bokoblins. The minute the boys entered the arena wooden bars covered the exit and the bokoblins sprung into battle position. "Don't worry, I have a plan!" Double d announced with fake confidence. He quickly explained it and sprung it into motion. Eddy and double d split apart, each followed by a bokoblin; when one got close to Double d, Ed struck with his sword, the same for Eddy's monster until both were dead. "Wow," Medli commented as Ed tried to bust the bars of her cage open with the sword, "You guys make an awesome team!"

"Sure do!" Eddy gloated, not noticing the large shadow overhead.

Out of nowhere a kargorok dropped a moblin into the arena, right in front of Double d, "ED, Assistance please!" he called shakily. "The sword is stuck!" Ed called trying to free the blade from the wooden bars. Eddy was no help; he fearfully blended into the woodwork as soon as he saw the massive beast. Double d ran to the cage and tried to pull the sword free. "Duck!" Medli called as the moblin wound-up its spear. "Where?" Ed asked as he and Double d turned out of the way just in time. The powerful weapon splintered the wooden bars and freed the sword. "S-stay back!" Double d called in terror before fighting the massive pig. Through a mix of courage and luck he beat his foe. "Thank you!" Medli praised when the fight was over, "I have to tell you what I found out!"

"You can save money by switching to Geico?" Eddy ventured.

"No, worse!" Medli continued, "Some creature is doing horrible things to the great Valoo's tail!"

"Where is Valoo anyway?" Double d asked

"He's right up there, I'm kind of surprised that you haven't seen him yet."

The three Eds backed up a few paces and scanned the near-by Cliffside. Sitting before them was a huge red dragon coughing up smoke. "DRAGON!" Ed ran to the hulking beast and gave it a hug. "Spicy!" he commented through his gritted teeth after Valoo torched him with his fire breath. "Nice going dummy!" Eddy laughed as Ed shook the soot off like a dog. Double d searched, but could not find the dragon's tail, "Where's his tail?"

"It's in the room right beneath this one." Medli responded.

"Well, whatever's down there, I guess we gotta get rid of it." Eddy grumbled. "I'll go tell everyone what's happening," Medli announced, "But you'll need this if you want to go the distance." Medli handed Eddy a rope with a claw on the end of it. "What's the twine for?" Eddy asked.

"That's a grappling hook," Double d corrected, "It's used to cross gaps and grab at things that are too far away to reach by hand." He demonstrated by latching onto a near-by branch and swinging across. I retracted as soon as he got to the other side. "It retracts automatically though," Medli added when Double d crossed back, "So all three of you have to use it at the same time."

"Let's move 'em out!" Ed shouted swinging across the gap with Eddy and Double d.

"If memory serves," Double d recited from inside a cage-like platform, "The room Medli described is locked, and no ordinary key can unlock it."

"The key's gotta be around here somewhere!" Eddy rallied as he scanned the map.

"SUKI YAKI!" Ed suddenly shouted as he cut the three ropes that kept the platform aloft. Eddy and Double d began to scream in terror before something stopped their dissent, a spout of lava. "ED YOU IDIOT!" Eddy shouted throwing a large rock ad Ed's seemingly empty head, "What'd you do that for?"

"Well the platform seems to be holding out," Double d commented as the lava slowly lowered them down, "I suggest we continue our quest."

"Quest? When did this become a quest?" Eddy shouted as Double d and Ed followed a stone path. "What kind of crazy fanfic am I in?" he mumbled as he followed his friends.

They crossed through many more rooms and solved many more puzzles until they found a room full of magtails. "AWAY WITH YOU DEAMONS!" Ed shouted poking one in its huge blue eye. It curled up as if dead, Ed lifted it up, "I found a prize Eddy!" he shouted. "Yeah, yeah, later stupid!" Eddy shouted as he and Double d circled around a chest surrounded by fire. "Ed, could you place the magtail here please?" Ed did as he was asked, placing the beast on a switch. The flames died down, Eddy opened the large blue chest and pulled out a golden key with an eye in the center. "It must be the one we need!" Double d announced. "Yeow!" Eddy shouted as the flames re-enveloped the chest. "Ed, why'd you move the magtail!" he shouted in pain. "But . . . Ed's over there." Double d said pointing to the door. "Yup, it's me alright!" he announced stupidly. The three turned around to see four angry-looking magtails staring them down and left hastily.

They backtracked through the fiery cavern until they came close to the room Medli described. It had a pit of lava in the center, which the Eds swung across with ease, and an ornate dragon-shaped doorway guarded by a golden lock, much like the key. "I guess this is it." Eddy mumbled as Ed caught a fairy in a bottle. "It is prettyful!" he explained, putting the bottle in his jacket-like tunic. Double d put the key in the giant lock, assuring himself more than the Eds as he did so, "Well, nothing ventured nothing gained, yes indeedy!" he strained to unlock the door, putting all his weight on it. The lock clicked, and the excess weight of Double d slid off onto the floor. The huge lock disappeared, the golden chains slid away into nothingness and the door rose up for the Eds to enter.

"This place gives me the creeps." Eddy stuttered as the door slid closed behind them. It was a large room with a familiar pit of lava in the center of it. Hanging from the top of the room was Valoo's tail, a pronged thing much like the grappling hook itself. "Well, there's his tail," Double d looked for the creature that was supposedly pestering it, but could not find it, "I have a bad feeling about this . . ."

The room began to shake violently and the lava bubbled profusely. Then a giant creature, much like a magtail, burst from the lava with a mighty roar. The Eds panicked at the sight of the beast's large pincers and fiery demeanor.

"WHAT'DO WE DO, WHAT'DO WE DO!" Eddy cowered behind Double d. "Not good, NOT GOOD!" Double d shouted running across the room as the monster tried to crush the Eds with its claws. His friends following behind until the monster trapped them between its claws and prepared to breathe fire on them. "WAIT, my brain is working!" Ed shouted as he grabbed the grappling hook and threw it at Valoo's tail. It latched on and Ed grabbed his friends and sailed over the beast, Valoo up above growling in protest. "Quick thinking lumpy!" Eddy praised at the three swung onto a platform above the cavern. Valoo overhead thrashed about until a huge pile of stone landed on the monster, cracking its shell. "Ed, that's it! We'll use Valoos anger against the beast." Double d advised as the creature replaced the stone up above, where the Eds proceeded to knock it down again the same way. This continued until the beast's shell was completely off, and the stone was reduced to rubble. "Now what?" Eddy asked staring at the worm-like monster as it began its rebuttal. "We fight it head-on!" Double d instructed.

Eddy ran to the back of the room, creating a distraction, while Ed focused the grappling hook onto the creature's eye. When it pulled its eye to the other two Eds, Double d hit it with the sword. Within a few quick sword slashes the beast doubled over and exploded into dust. "That was fun!" Ed shouted as he and Double d cheered. But when they saw that Eddy did not cheer with them they turned to where he was lying in a burnt heap. The monster had gotten him.

"He don't look too good." Ed announced picking up the charred remains of his friend. Double d was near tears, until he remembered something, "Ed, may I see 'the pretty fairy?" he asked. Ed dropped Eddy on the ground and produced the bottle. Double d pulled the stopper off it and the human-like fairy flew out and circled Eddy. The charred skin and burnt clothing repaired themselves as the fairy disappeared. "Wha, what happened?" he mumbled as he regained consciousness. "EDDY!" Ed hugged his now-living friend. "Ed! Can someone tell me what's up?" Double d winced as he spoke "you . . . died."

"DIED?!?!?" Eddy shouted looking himself over, "Does that mean I'm some kind of soul reaper now?"

"Not quite," Double d raised the empty bottle; "Ed's fairy brought you back to life."

"And here I was gonna spit-roast it!" Eddy joked as he stood up and dusted himself off.

"What's this?" Eddy asked, picking up a heart-shaped canister that fell from the dead monster. "That's a heart container," Double d answered picking it up and examining it with his magnifying glass, "they allow the user more resilience in battle and make one harder to kill."

"In that case, let's stock up on both!" Eddy resolved as he greedily stuffed it into his shirt. "Now, which way is out?"

To answer him, a whirlwind circled in the center of the room, where the lava had cooled. "Swirly whirly!" Ed laughed as he carried Double d and Eddy into the dust devil. They spiraled within it and disappeared within it.

"Gyuh!" Double d gasped as the whirlwind stopped turning, "Ed, do ya think you could give us a little warning before you step into a cyclone!"

"But it put us back where we started." Ed commented, pointing to where the king of red lions bobbed in the water.

"Ed, did you flash us backwards like last time?" Eddy shouted, "Cause I'm NOT doing that again!"

"Eds!" the joyful cry came from behind the startled boys. There stood both Medli and Komali, Komali faithfully cradling Din's pearl.

"Hi guys!" Ed shouted happily as usual.

"I assume the fellow Rito's know of our exploits?" Double D calmly addressed. Medli nodded, "Well, Komali? Don't you have something you want to say?" she prodded.

"Eds," the shy prince started, "Thank you so much! I'm sorry I ever mistrusted you." Eddy almost got something snarky out, but Double d spoke first, "We all do things in life we regret, Apology accepted!"

"I hope I can be like you three someday." He sighed

"You will!" Medli assured, "I just know it, right guys?"

"Yeah, sure, I guess," Eddy mumbled, "Just hang in there tiny!" Suddenly Komali handed Double d the pearl, "I want you to have this. Giving you the thing I value most will give me the courage to stand up to bad things!"

"Very well then," Double d delicately held the pearl, recollecting where it had been the last time an Ed touched it, "Ed, I think you should hold onto it. Just don't try and eat it again!"

"WHAT?" Ed stupidly called, the pearl making a bulge in his mouth.

"Jeez, Ed!" Eddy scolded, taking the treasure out of his mouth, "Don't slobber on it, we need that!" he opened up one of Ed's pockets, put the pearl in it, and glued it shut with super glue.

High upon the island's peak, Valoo roared a less angry Roar In an ancient language. "Use the wind god's . . . wind?" Medli translated, "That's what he said, but I don't know what it means." the Eds shrugged their shoulders.

"It may have something to do with that wind shrine I saw on the way up," Double d offered, pointing to a tunnel near-by. "Also," Medli continued, "Valoo names you three, Ed, Edd, and Eddy, true heroes."

"And that's say'n something!" Ed agreed.

"I'm going to go and visit Valoo!" Komali announced, almost the way Jimmy would if (or rather whenever) he had to visit a dragon, "I'll have the best wings ever!" he ran off then, towards the path the Ed's had just crossed. Medli started to follow, but stopped for a moment and said, "Thank you so much Eds, I'll see you again someday!"

"Bye!" Eddy called.

"Good luck Komali!" Double d added

"I'm out of here!" Eddy huffed as soon as the Rito's were out of earshot. "Ok, Simba! We got the pearl, where to next?"

"There's no time to lose, we must sail south to where the next pearl sleeps!" the majestic boat answered.

"Silly Willy, pearls don't sleep!" The three Ignored Ed and the Eds climbed into the boat and began to sail, but a big problem soon stood out. "This ain't going too fast!" Ed bluntly pointed out as the boat meekly skimmed along. " No wonder. The wind isn't blowing in the right direction." The king of red lions deduced.

"I guess we gotta wait until the wind changes direction," Eddy sighed.

"WE CAN'T AFFORD TO WAIT!"

"But we can't change the wind's direction either!" Double d turned to a small tunnel that bore through dragon roost to the other side and answered, "Maybe we can . . ."

"Are you sure this is gonna work?" Eddy grumbled wringing out his wet hero's cap, Part of getting to the shrine had involved swimming, for whatever reason. "Valoo said 'use the wind god's wind.' So, in theory, if we make a good enough offering to him we may be able to persuade him into changing the wind's direction." Double d spelled out.

"Compelling!" Ed agreed. The three climbed the stone steps that led up to two plaques, actually more like one and a half plaques. The one that was still in one piece had triangle-shaped markings on it. "I think it's in Greek!"  
Eddy announced unsure. "Actually, they appear to be the same as notes for the wind waker." Double d corrected, pulling out the baton. Following the stone's instructions, he played a simple melody in 3/4th time. And then the wind stirred above them, as if carrying the cooled ash from dragon roost away for all to see.

"My turn!" Eddy declared, taking the baton, "Yep, that's a miiiiiiighty nice breeze!" someone commented before he could play a single note. The three turned to their left, "GAH!" barked Double d in alarm, "Please don't do that!" sitting on a lime-green cloud was a navy-blue frog, about the same size as Ed, it seemed to appear from nowhere really fast. "Where'd you come from?" Eddy asked after nearly dropping the wind waker, "And for that matter, what the heck are you supposed to be?"

"The name's Zephos," the frog answered, "I'm the God of the winds."

"G-god of winds?" the three stuttered.

"O' course, what else would I be!"

"S-sorry for my friend's reaction," Double d apologized, " We just expected the god of winds to look . . . different."

"What? Like a puff of smoke, or a human, or maybe even a HEDGEHOG?" Zephos replied, "Never mind that, young wind waker!"

"Wind waker?" Eddy tested the word, "you mean this thing comes with a title?"

"Indeed it does, and for beginners, you boys have a nice wind sense about you."

"Aw, shucks, thanks Zither!" Ed blushed

"It's Zephos. Anywho that tune you just picked up allows you to control the direction of the wind."

"You mean we can use this power whenever we choose?" Double d asked.

"Of course wind waker, depending on how it's used the wind can be a good thing . . . or a very bad thing."

"Bad as in Kanye West, or . . ." Eddy ventured

"Bad as in my brother, Cyclos." Zephos hovered to where the broken plaque jutted out of the bedrock, "It saddens me to say that he's miffed that his monument's broken, so these days he spends his time creating cyclones to torment people. So if you ever see a cyclone at sea, chastise him for me, will you?"

"No sweat, we'll cut him down to size!"

"Goodbye Zipper!"

"Zephos, Ed."

"Gravy!"

And with that the strange god was spirited away on a fast gale. With the wind now facing south, the Eds climbed back into the king of red lions. But while sailing the sea, it was noticed that Double d was the best at controlling the windwaker. And, only Eddy seemed to know this, Zephos would only say windwaker, not windwaker_s_.


	6. Return of the captain no, not Linebeck

Not long after setting out, the four ran into another strange sea denizen. Ed had started singing his gravy-song and Double D was staring at his new (Mostly empty) map when suddenly a voice called as if from nowhere:

"Hoy! Hold it right there, small fry!" the Eds followed the mysterious orders and stopped the boat

"It wasn't me!" Ed responded as if blamed.

"W-who's there?" Double d asked timidly.

"If it's Kevin, I swear-" Eddy began when a fish, the size of a salmon and navy blue all over, leapt from the ocean and far beyond their heads. It landed back in the water with a loud splash, turned around and amazingly began to speak.

"I don't know where you got your mitts on that sea-chart you got there-" the strange animal started before the Eds cut him off.

"Mutant fish man!" Ed shouted leaning to get a closer look and almost falling into the water too.

"A talking fish?" Double d asked, "But that's impossible!"

"Oh, but it ain't! Anyhow, looks like it's got nothing but seas drawn on it!"

"That would seem to be the case,"

"It's pathetic! In fact, it's almost an insult to call that thing a sea-chart, if you ask me!"

"What's it to ya?"

"Eddy, let the fish-man make his point."

"What's the matter, small-fry? I'm just trying to be nice here! I'm tellin' you you've got a problem, and you do."

Eddy grumbled out what sounded like "Don't call me small-fry." And with that the fish-man continued, "I'm here to teach you what I know about this island, so open up you're sea-chart and make it snappy!"

"Double d fumbled to pull it out of the wayfarer's guide and almost dropped it, but fish-man caught it and marked a square of it with an ink-laden brush. On the spot was an Arial-view tracing of Dragon-roost, complete with a caption. Fish-man began speaking yet again, "There's a very peculiar cave towards the backside of this island, but I doubt you'll ever get to it: unless you sprout wings and learn to fly."

"That's stupid." Eddy commented before hearing Double d scribbling on a blank page parallel to dragon roost.

"Learn…to…fly. Thank you fish-man!"

"As if we're ever coming back here again!" Eddy grumbled, remembering how he died.

"Are you gonna do that with the rest of the map?" Ed asked, pointing at all the blankness that covered the paper.

"Well, not me personally. But the rest of my school can, nice bunch of fish."

"What's the catch?" Eddy Asked distrustfully.

"No real catch, except for a little all-purpose bait, but for a reliable chart it's well-worth it! Don't say I never did nothing for you!" the fish man looked as if he was about to swim away, but instead turned to the king of red lions, who had been silent the whole time, "I've repaid my debt, you do the rest!" And with that final note swam away.

The rest of the journey was uneventful. Eddy and Double d occasionally asked the king of red lions what debt the fish-man owed him, but he never answered. "Take one down, pass it around, that's eleven bottles of gravy on the wall!"

"Ed, shut up!" Eddy shouted dog-piling him. Squeezing his mouth shut, he growled, " I don't want to hear another peep until we're there!"

"But Eddy," he whimpered standing back up and pointing, "We are here!" there on the horizon sat two similar islands, both shorter than dragon-roost. And even though night had begun, the Eds could see that the island was covered in foliage: tall grass, trees, and plants of all sorts. "This is where we must go," the king of red lions announced in all his grandeur, "**Forest Haven."**

"Looks like a giant tree." Eddy commented as the boat came to a stop. "Indeed, yet it is a sacred place. Inside it's grotto lives the spirit of the earth: The great Deku tree."

"And we can assume he has one of the pearls?" Double d predicted, stepping off the boat's deck. "Yes, Farore's pearl to be precise." The boat turn to them, concern showing on his carved face, "I fear that Ganon's vile hand may have already reached to this most sacred of sanctuaries."

"A monster hunters war is never built!" Ed announced, perhaps trying to sound smart, or brave (I'm not really sure.). "Go forward with caution, Eds."

"C'mon, c'mon! Move it or lose it Double d!" Eddy shouted from the top of several earthen platforms Double d was still trying to climb. "Just . . . a . . . moment . . . friends!" he panted, collapsing on the final platform.

"Ah, you're still weaker than a guppy!" Eddy started walking again, not looking where he was going, "The real world 'll chew you up and spit you out at this rate!"

"E-d-d-d-y!" Double d stuttered looking at his friend's path. "What?" Eddy looked ahead, but before he could do anything he was swallowed by what looked like a giant Venus flytrap. "Guys! Help me!" Eddy shouted as the plant chewed him up and spat him out again. "Now parish, beast of the depths!" Ed shouted, hacking away at the plant with his sword while Double d wiped the creature's spit off Eddy. "What the heck was that thing?" Eddy asked when he regained his composure. "A boko-baba. You really should watch where you're going Eddy, or you'll be killed long before I am."

"Geez, ya sound like my mother!"

"Hey guys!" Ed had killed the boko baba and was now wearing its head like a mask, "I'm just a mean green monster from outer space, and I'm bad!!!!"

"Ed, you maniac!" Eddy laughed in spite of himself and the dangers they faced, "Take that thing off, you look like a bad Broadway prop!"

"Broadway? Oh, and I found: one rupee!"

"Sweet! Gimme gimme gimme!" Eddy grabbed the rupee and stored it in his pocket.

"One boko stick!" Ed held out the stick and bent it a little. It snapped out of his hands and into the ocean, "Never mind. Oh and this thingy!" Ed held out a seed that looked a lot like the boko baba itself. "Interesting." Double d examined it with his magnifying glass, "I've heard of these seeds before, they're boiled in some places to make a 'magic' restoring potion."

"Too bad. Let's get going!" Eddy dragged them away from where they sat.

They fought several more boko babas and an octopus-like creature (an octorok, according to Double d) and swung across water-filled chasms before coming to the entrance of the forest haven. "Good lord." Double d and the others stopped in their tracks. The inside of the cave was covered in trees and tall grass; the only illumination came from the dancing fireflies. Cleaner water than they'd ever seen encircled the plants, and in the center of it all was a giant tree; taller than Valoo and thicker than a house. But the trunk was the most interesting part: It seemed to have a face. "I guess that's the Deku tree." Eddy started wading through the clean water to a set of lily pads larger than the king of red lions. "Oh, Mr. Deku tree!" Ed called when they got to the lily pad, but it gave no response. "Maybe it's asleep?"

"A tree that sleeps?" they almost thought of leaving when suddenly a red blob with a moronic face sprouted from the face-like trunk. "It is the curse of evil Tim!" Ed shouted in terror backing away. "Actually, that's a chu-chu. But what it's doing on the Deku tree is a mystery to me." Double d answered pulling out the grappling hook. "Hey, there's more of 'em!" Eddy was correct; several more red and green chu-chus appeared on the tree's trunk. The tree stirred and moaned in pain. "I will save you, living tree of Neverland!" Ed charged at the tree but tripped, smashing into the base of it. All the chu-chu's fell from their perch and gathered around the Eds. "Nice going, lumpy!" Eddy shouted, hacking away at a few with the hero's sword. Soon he and Double d had purged the clean water of their blobby pestilence.

No sooner had the last chu-chu fallen when the tree stirred again " "

"What?" Eddy asked when he heard the garbled words of the tree. 'It's speaking some sort of ancient language" Double d answered. It continued to speak its bizarre dialect and lifted the three boys into the air with its lily pads, which served as hands. "Hey, put me down ya crazy clapboard!" Eddy shouted at the living foliage.

"Eddy, pick your words wisely! This is a guardian spirit after all."

"Not to mention a duck!" The tree gave them a strange look, than spoke again in the Ed's native language, "I must apologize, I was in error. I saw your clothing, and suddenly felt a longing for an age gone by . . . that longing caused an ancient language to pass my lips." Double d gasped, "Does that mean you lived long enough ago to know the ancient hero?"

"Indeed. I am the guardian spirit of this forest haven- the Deku tree."

"Can I have your autograph?" Ed asked.

"He doesn't have hands stupid!" Eddy replied for him, the tree began again.

"I owe you thanks for your aid in ridding me of those foul creatures," Double d stepped forward,

"Not a problem, great spirit. We were already on our way here to ask you something."

"Ah, so you must be the three the king of red lions guided here."

"How do you know about our boat?" Eddy asked in slight shock. The tree seemed not to hear him. "So it is true. Then you have come here because you have need of the pearl of the goddess?"

"As soon as possible!" Double d begged carefully.

The tree sighed, "I knew there was a reason those monsters had found their way into my wood . . . Gannon has returned." Eddy and Double d gulped at the Deku tree's reaction, if even he feared the return of Gannon, how strong could he be? "In that case we must make haste." The tree sucked up a gust of air, almost sucking up the Ed's hats, and then called in a booming voice, "Koroks! Little children of the woods, these travelers are not your enemies. Let your hearts be at ease, and show yourselves!" several creatures stepped out of the cracks and crevices of the Deku tree's trunk. They appeared to be wooden dolls wearing leaf masks, and yet they were alive. "Intriguing!" Double d blurted out while the living saplings stared back at them with the same curiosity. They leapt into the air and took flight on leaf-like propellers. "Cool!" Ed stared as they descended gracefully, "Can I fly, too?"

"What do you call yourselves?" the forest-children asked.

"I'm Eddy, got any rupees?"

"What's a rupee?" the flying dolls asked.

"I'm Double d. How do you manage to stay aloft?"

"Magic."

"I am Ed, future monster hunter!"

"These are the Koroks," the Deku-tree told them, "They are the spirits of the forest. Once upon a time, long ago, the Koroks took on human form. But when they came to live on the sea, they took this form instead." As he explained the koroks landed in a circle around the Eds.

"These guys give me the creeps!" Eddy whispered.

"Now they fear people . . .but to me they will ever be my cherished children."

"See Eddy, they're more scared of you than you are of them!"

"As it happens, you have come just in time for a ceremony the Koroks hold but once a year. I will grant you the pearl when the ceremony is over. I must apologize for the delay, but if the ceremony is not completed soon, ill fate could befall us."

"Well, I suppose a short intermission and a taste of Korok culture couldn't hurt." Double d agreed.

"So let's get this show on the road!" Eddy demanded.

"Great Deku tree! We can't start the ceremony yet, Makar is in trouble!" Shouted a frightened and slightly obnoxious voice. "That sounds familiar!" Ed's smile gave way to thought, "Because- is sounds liiike . . ."

"Sounds like melonhead, Bonehead!" Eddy finished his thought. Suddenly another boy, dressed like the Eds, zip-lined down a vine holding onto a piece of wood. Near the end of the vine he let go of one end of the board and dove into the crowd of Koroks and Eds. The boy replaced his cap onto his large, baldhead and gave a toothy grin. "Nice landing, huh plank!" he asked the piece of wood he was carrying. "Johnny, Get off me." Eddy growled from under his feet. "Wowzers, the Eds!" Johnny replied, following Eddy's orders, "Small world, huh guys?"

"Johnny? I thought we'd never see you again! What on earth are you doing here?" Double d asked.

"This is plank's birthplace, I'm learnin' the ropes of being a Korok!" he laughed, "So what are you guys doing here? Scamming the flowers."

"I forget what we're doing." Ed answered with an idiotic grin on his face.

"Ed, we're rescuing you're sister."

"Sarah? SARAH!" Ed charged of the lily pad and the Koroks strained to carry his girth back. "Are you going to do that every time?" Eddy asked in frustration.

"What happened to Sarah?" Johnny asked when Ed was recovered.

"I don't know it this makes any sense, but a man named Gannon kidnapped her." No sooner had the word Gannon passed his lips than the Koroks took back to the air in panic. The Deku tree took a moment to calm them than re addressed Johnny, "What is wrong, you and Makar are always late."

"It's not that, Great Deku tree, worse!" Johnny's terror again returned, "Makar fell into the forbidden woods!"

"What?! The forbidden woods!" the tree's voice was loud with anger and concern. "I warned him not to go farther than plank and I could reach, didn't I plank? But when he flew over those thorn-covered woods- I'm fired aren't I?"

"No, you're not. Foolish little Makar . . ."

"Are we fired?" Ed asked, not knowing he was never hired at all. "Eds, you've heard all this, correct." Double d nodded while Eddy sighed. "The forbidden woods are right beside the hallowed island of our forest haven. Those woods, the whole region is a vile place that is home to evil beasts."

"You want us to go in there and find him, don't you?" Eddy asked exasperated. "I am sorry to ask this of you. But I assume your presence on this island is no mistake; the king of red lions expects great things of you and thus brought you here. Please rescue young Makar for us!"

There was a brief pause, but Ed broke the silence, "Monster hunters never back away!"

"Ed's right. It may be dangerous, but someone's gotta do it!"

"But Deku tree, people can't fly!" Johnny pointed out, perhaps remembering how different he was form other Koroks. "Ah, yes. Thank you, child. You are right. It is not possible to enter those woods from the sea, is it?"

"Nope!" Johnny answered cheerily despite the situation.

"Eds, I would guess by your size that you are much heavier than my Korok children . . ."

"That would be logical, "Double d replied, lifting one with two fingers. "And yet I believe we may still be able to solve this dilemma."

"We could build a plane!" Ed offered pantomiming flying a plane.

"Stop breakin' the fourth wall, stupid!" Eddy smacked Ed mid-panto-flight.

"You must use the item I bestow upon you." The tree grunted, than gave a mighty shout. Upon its highest branch a glistening leaf sprouted.

"Who stepped on a duck?" Ed asked, fanning the air with his hand. "Forgive me Eds, but could you climb to my crown and get that leaf?"

"Umm, certainly but how?" Double d peered up at the high branches, too high to reach by hand.

"Oh that's easy!" Johnny declared, grabbing Eddy by the hand, "Follow us, plank and I are experts at using baba buds." The board stayed silent as Johnny led the Eds along.

"Alright, first you find a nice purple bud, like this one!" Johnny quickly ran the perimeter of a bud, humming excitedly.

"Here's one guy I didn't need to meet again!" Eddy grumbled.

"Eddy, can't you say something nice for once?" Double d whispered nagging.

"The guy gives me a headache!'

"Is that all you can say about a fellow-"

"Hey?" Johnny looked at them accusingly, "Are you two paying attention?"

"Measure twice, cut once!" Ed bleated out.

"Whatever! Next you got to jump into it!" Johnny (Still holding plank, mind you) crouched, leapt and cannonballed into the bud, disappearing under the purple leaves.

"Johnny!" Double d shouted, running to the bud.

"Ah, it probably ate him!" Eddy leaned over the bud, which was now shaking furiously, "Go riddance to-aaaaaah!" the bud burst open and something gray and green shot Eddy screaming into the air. The thing seemed to be laughing, and when Eddy looked closer at it, "Johnny? What the?"

"That's the magic of baba buds, Eddy! Plank says they help you fly!"

"Fly-smy! Now get me down!"

"Ok, but it might sting!" Eddy looked down, they were nearly Ten feet in the air! Johnny opened his hat and used it as a parachute, but Eddy dropped like a rock to the ground.

"Granddad, Men really are meant to fly!" Eddy nonsensically spouted when his friends gathered around him. "Johnny, is it really safe to use those?" Double d asked when he and plank landed. "Nope. But I'd like to see you get there otherwise!" he laughed, "Oh, one more thing, by leaning in a certain direction, you can control the way the buds send you!"

"Well, that's convenient!"

"Oooh, Oooh!" Ed bellowed raising his hand, "I want to go first!"

"Why not? Eddy still looks out of it, and Double d, you look too scared to try!"

"I certainly am not!" Johnny didn't seem to hear this, he leapt into the bud again and it spat him forward, "C'mon, time's awaisting!"

"Wait for me!" Ed shouted, diving for the ground-level bud, "Allyup!" the two leapt from one bud to another, going higher and higher as the suspended buds carried them.

"Ooowww," Eddy groaned, regaining consciousness, "No good, tree huggin'!"

"Um, Eddy, We still have a job to do."

"Ah, let Ed and baldy handle it! I'm not getting killed again!"

"Eddy!"

"What? It's true."

"Hey!" Johnny and Ed were standing on top of a leafy Tree platform, "Hurry up, slowpokes!"

"You heard him, Eddy."

"Sheesh."

Double d stared down into the powerful bud, and carefully stepped inside. The leaves Wriggled and shook all around him as he leaned forward at the last crucial moment. "Not good, not good!" Double d shouted as he spun ahead into another bud. When he got to the next one, he leaned in the direction the next bud faced. Eddy also leapt into the next two buds, but missed the third and to start from the beginning again. But Soon all three Eds were on the same tree with Johnny. "Now you gotta swing to the next one!" Johnny announced, grabbing a vine and crossing a gap to the next bud sitting on a green pole. "Remember, don't look down!" The Eds peered over the Edge of the platform to see that they were indeed high up, defiantly high enough to kill them. "You go first, Ed!" Eddy handed Ed the grappling hook and pushed him across. "But Eddy, the grappling hook retracts after each swing!" Eddy thought about this a moment "Ed you lummox! Get back here!"

"I am Ed of the Jungle! Strong as he can be."

"Ed, Watch out for Eddy!" Sure enough Ed slammed in to Eddy and swung back across with Doubled hanging on feebly. The Eds swung past the baba bud and loomed over a green death "Ed, we've overshot our destination!"

"Reverse thrusters!" Ed shouted, pulling the rope back.

"ED, YOU IDIOT!" Eddy shouted before a chorus of screaming from the three started. It was cut short by pitch-black ooze. "Unclean! Eddy, is this what it feels like to be dead?" Double d asked the others, who were once again pressed against him. "Nah, it's airier and everything's blue. Where are we?" That was answered by a familiar rumbling; the Eds leaned towards where the other bud waited. "How'd we end up in the bud?" Eddy asked as they sailed to another one. "I'm not sure, could be luck?" the two smarter Eds pondered this while flying from one bud to another, but Ed on the other hand made a huge mistake while staring aimlessly about the forest, "I LOOKED DOWN, GUYS!"

He stopped in mid-air, and clenched the other two Eds. "ED NO STOP!" Double d shouted looking down, waiting to die. But underneath him something miraculous happened; the final bud slowly moved underneath them and caught them as they fell. "Ok, something's defiantly wrong here!" Eddy announced, as he had not seen what Double d had. "Eddy the baba bud saved us!"

"It is alive?" Ed asked when the bud spit them back into the air towards the Deku tree's crown. "It's almost as if it wants us to fight back . . ."

"NO MORE QUOTING THINGS FROM THE REAL WORLD!" Eddy shouted when they landed, "geez."

"Sparkly!" Ed shouted, picking up the Deku leaf, and showing it to the other Eds. "Is there a manual for this?" Eddy asked, feeling the thick veins between the papery margins. "All you three have to hold on to it and use your magic to help it glide."

"Magic? But I thought that wasn't real!" Double d announced, "Besides, we should be much too heavy to stay aloft with this."

"Double d, if there's one thing worth knowing about the great sea, it's that it's full of magic. As for the other concern, three times the hero means three times the magic! You can also use it to blast gusts of air like a fan."

"Cool" the Eds announced simultaneously.

"Hey guys!" The Eds looked down to a hole in the cave with a grassy platform underneath it. Johnny and Plank were standing right next to a grass arrow pointing outside "You coming or what?"

"We will be with you momentarily," Double d called back. It was still a long way down, and for a logical boy like Double d crossing the chasm with magic might as well be getting a haircut with a chainsaw. "On the count of three, we jump! All of us or none of us!"

"One!"

"Eddy, I'm having second thoughts!"

"Two!"

"There's no such thing as magic, we'll die!" Ed leaned over his scared friend and smiled, "Have faith Double d"

"Three!" and with that Eddy and Ed pushed themselves and their clever friend off the crown and into the air.

Double d didn't look until he heard a strange chiming noise above him. He saw that not only were they not plummeting to certain death, but also the leaf really was supporting all three of their weight. "What- How on earth?"

"That's the sound of depleting magic!" Johnny told them as they floated towards the platform, "See? The Deku tree told you magic was real!" Double d swallowed, "I suppose it is . . .But how do we get down?" They were over the platform now and were about to hit the cave wall. "Ya just let go!" The Eds followed Johnny's instructions, but perhaps too early, "Oh yeah, one more thing! You can open it again and use it like-" Loud screams and an even louder thud stopped Johnny's instructions, he leaned over three Ed-shaped holes in the dirt and finished, "a parachute."

When the Eds pulled themselves out of the dirt, Johnny led them to an outside natural balcony. Across the salty straight loomed another cave-like island, but this one was covered in thorny branches. "That's the Forbidden woods." Johnny pointed to the ominous island, "I gives me and plank the creeps!"

"Yes, well. We appreciate your help Johnny; why don't you go back inside and prepare for that ceremony." Double d stepped forward but was surprised by Johnny stepping ahead of them. "I wish I could, but the Great Deku tree told me that I needed to help you incase a monster tried to eat you, or if you get lost." Johnny started cutting grass around the balcony with a small knife, "There's magic in the grass, you'll need it in there." The Eds started cutting grass along with Johnny. "Great, now we're stuck with baldy!" Eddy growled, but Double d said nothing. The Eds looked up to the tower yet again, and Double d got a closer look with his telescope. "Wowzers, where'd you get the neat Telescope?" Johnny asked.

"Birthday present. Johnny, even with a magic leaf, it looks like the only platform inside is too high up to reach, how-"

"That's where we gotta use the updrafts!" Johnny pulled out another Deku leaf, this one slightly smaller and darker green, and jumped off the first platform.

He flew across to another one and on to the Forbidden woods, using mini-cyclones to get across. The Eds followed suit, and it seemed flying wasn't so hard once you got the hang of it. The inside of the forbidden woods was much like forest haven, only the plats were cursed and evil instead of sacred and good. Man-eating plants like the boko-baba and giant Mothula plagued the heroes the whole way. But Johnny proved to be a priceless friend and helpful guide through the shadowy dungeon, such as he was in the battle of Mothula . . .

"Are we there yet?" Eddy asked again for the twelfth time while jumping out of a baba bud. Johnny giggled, "Nope." The Eds followed Johnny through a room infested with monsters, ignoring them, as they were too slow to affect them. "Are we there yet?"

"Nope!" They glided across a gap to a doorway all by itself; Johnny and Ed opened it together. "ARE WE THERE YET!" Johnny hysterically laughed at Eddy's impatience "NOPE!" after awhile he stopped laughing and caught sight of where they were, "Um guys, they're some things in this forest that are bad, I mean really bad . . ."

"Such as?" Double d asked, stopping in his tracks to listen.

"Such as Kalle Demos, the giant flower, and there's always the Mothula."

"Oh, oh, is it like Mothera?" Ed asked, giving a bad impersonation. Johnny leaned down to planks crayon-drawn mouth, "What's that Plank? Plank says to stop breaking the fourth wall or else . . ."

"So Johnny, tell us more about this Mothula." Johnny looked scared again, "well, it's big and it kinda sparkles,"

"Like those stupid teen vampires everybody's raving about?" Eddy said snidely, walking farther into the room they were in. "Exactly. By the way, Plank says you're a hypocrite."

"Tell him I said he was chopsticks. What else."

"It can fly . . ." Johnny looked horrified, and Double d was cautiously stepping forward "It eats people . . . and . . . _And . . ."_

"AND WHAT?"  
"And it's right behind you!"

Eddy laughed. "Is that the best you can do? That joke's older than Sturgeon!" He stopped to brush some powdery and, almost sparkley, dust off his tunic, "Jeez, what's with this stuff? It makes me look like Jimmy." Eddy looked up to where it was falling, only to see a giant Moth with one eye and four wings staring down at him hungrily. "Oh, you were serious . . . AAAAH!" Eddy dove out of the way just as the giant insect mowed down Double d in his tracks. "We need Godzilla for this part!" Ed shouted running around in circles. "Don't worry Ed! All we need's a little gust of wind; and-" Johnny unfurled his Deku leaf, only to find the magic leaf bear. "I'M OUT OF MAGIC!" Double d got to his feet shakily pulled out their Deku leaf, still with some magic, and fanned a gust at the moth just as it prepared to knock him down again. When it fell, Ed hit it with the sword and it sprayed several static-clinging Mothula eggs, called Morths, onto the Eds. After knocking them off with the sword, Double d and Ed continued battling the creature until it fell. "Well, I guess that's that." Double d muttered, "Shall we proceed?"

"Uh guys," Johnny stood beside the door, bars fastening it closed, "We're kinda stuck." The three began to think of ways to get out, while Eddy started rifling through a treasure chest near-by. Instead of finding rupees, like he hoped, he found a yellow boomerang with a red pearl in the center of it. This gave him an idea.

"Maybe we could dig underneath it?" Johnny offered, but Double d turned that down too, "We'd need a shovel."

"We could eat the bars!" Ed started chewing in them, getting splinters on his tongue; "The indigestion would be excruciating!" Eddy stepped in front of him, a huge smile on his face. "And I suppose you have an idea?" Double d asked with a little hope. "Just a thought." He shifted his weight and tossed the boomerang at two crystals above the door. The bars slid up and the Eds and Johnny tumbled out laughing. "Then again," Johnny said standing up, "This place also has some good things." Before continuing onward to where Makar was, Eddy looked at the boomerang and whispered, "No foolin'."

"Here we are guys, Plank says Makar's on the other side of this room!" the Eds entered a dark chamber with poisonous-looking water all around it. Pots dotted the walls, which Ed started to smash for energy and rupees. "This was a very brave thing for you to do, Johnny. Thank-you!" Double d nodded as  
Johnny made his way over to a large cauldron that would take him back to the entrance of the forest. "No problem, good luck g-" He started before staring at plank oddly, "You want me to what? Isn't that a little dangerous?" While Johnny seemed to argue with his piece of wood, Ed started to wail, "GET 'EM OFF GUYS, GET 'EM OFF!" he was covered in Morths from a pot he had smashed and had a hard time getting them off, even with his sword swing at them. "Spin attack Ed, Morths come off with a spin attack!" Double d instructed. Ed Spun in a fast circle, and while it almost scalped Eddy it got rid of the Morths and Ed smiled. "Thanks, guys."

"Quit foolin' around!" Eddy ordered to the other Eds, "Don't you guys remember we have a pearl to collect?"

The Eds crossed the room to where the door was and for some reason, Plank was winning the argument against Johnny. "Um, guys . . . plank wants me to go with you!"

"What? No way! This is our sctick!"

"I concur, we'll be fine on our own. Why don't you return to the Deku tree and prepare for that ceremony."

"Well if you say so." Jonny Replied, but plank wouldn't hear of it. "I am not a sissy!" the two argued while the Eds continued onward.

"That guy was startin' to get on my nerves!"

"Eddy, without him we'd be lost it the forest for sure."

"Whatever, let's find the sprout an-"

Ed grabbed his friends with one arm and pointed with the other, "I spy with my little eye . . . Something that is green!" bouncing on a giant blue flower was a Korok, though smaller than any the Eds had seen before, "H-have you come to rescue me?" the little Korok panted. "Yes Makar. Stay there, in case something goes wrong." The Eds crossed the floor to where he was, "Aww, he's all little, like Eddy!" Ed noted.

"I AM NOT SHORT!" Eddy replied, before a Creature popped out of the flower behind Makar. It liked like a Boko-baba, only smaller and with different colors. "Ack! What's that?" Eddy asked retreating behind Ed. "What goes wrong, Aka Kalle Demos." Double d answered as it swallowed Makar whole and began to move the flower petals. "It ate our little buddy!" Ed sobbed, "We must vanquish it!" the flower closed around it and blue tentacles pulling it to the roof of the room. Sickle shaped tentacles came out of its bottom, and then sense flowed in to them. "Ok, what's the plan, Double d?"

"We need to cut it down from the ceiling and slice it up from there. For that I recommend the boomerang." Eddy took it out and started cutting the beast down. When the monster finally fell, Ed drew his sword, "PREPARE YORSELF, DARK SPORE FROM BEYOND THE-"

"Hit it, Ed!" the other Eds shouted from a distance.

"Oh, yeah!" Ed smacked the tiny plant inside until the large flower bud closed around him, mercilessly chewing on him.

"ED!" Double d and Eddy both shouted. "Let go of my friend, you dolt!" Eddy cut down ten tentacles before it spat Ed shouting into the air. "Hurt." He mumbled when he landed. "He gonna be ok, Double d?" Eddy asked, chopping off several more tentacles while the sickle-shaped set tried to tear him apart as well. "He'll be fine, as long as he gets some rest." Double d answered, pulling Ed to the unmoving entrance. "I'll take over for him."

Double d and Eddy did a credible job together. Unlike Ed, Double d would hit the plant three times and Eddy would take over from there with his boomerang. Without much effort the head came off and bounced across the room, landing on Ed's stomach. "I feel asleep."{Note: I spelled this wrong on purpose to make fun of another misspelled bit of dialogue from a Nintendo videogame and of Ed's stupidity.} Ed mumbled, feeling the plant head on his gut, "Aww, I MISSED IT!"

"Cheer up, Ed. We killed the monster!" Just as Double d said this the head painlessly exploded on Ed, releasing another heart container and Makar.

"Little buddy, you're alive!" Ed bound Makar in another deadly hug. "You- you rescued me!" The frightened Korok cried into Ed's green tunic, "You have my thanks! When all went dark around me, I thought my time on earth was over."

"There, there." Double d replied, kneeling down and giving Ed back the sword, "The Deku tree and the other Koroks are worried sick over you!"

"The Deku tree sent you?!?" Makar started bouncing frantically, "Oh right, today's the day of the annual ceremony; I'm in so much trouble, I shouldn't be here!"

"Yeah, leaving sounds good, I'm bored!"

"But Eddy, the door's locked!" Eddy and Double d puzzled over this a moment before Ed pointed again, "Guys, another swirly-whirly!" finding no better way out the Eds and Makar left via warp tunnel.

Double d coughed, "I don't think I'll ever get used to that." The three had landed on the Deku tree's Lily-hand, and Eddy caught Makar as he materialized, "One Korok, hold the mayo!" the Deku tree looked Elated, so did the other Koroks; even Johnny (Who returned not long after the Eds had left him in the separate chamber) had a look of security on his face. But Makar looked horrified, especially when the Deku tree spoke to him, "Makar, you have returned safely!" he leaped out of Eddy's hands and sobbed into his stick-like stubs "I'm sorry, Great Deku tree . . . I know you warned us many times, but still I did not listen . . ."

"Told ya, Makar!" Johnny whispered behind Plank. The Deku tree smiled, "Do not worry, Makar. You are safe now, just be careful from now on." The living tree turned to the young heroes, " You have done well, Ed, Double d, and Eddy. I must thank you for your brave deeds."

"I love being a hero," Eddy whispered to his friends, "It never gets old!"

"Here is what I have promised you. Please accept it." the Deku tree shook his tall branches and out fell a green Treasure, "Money! Ch-ching!" Eddy gloated; grabbing it, until he remembered it was a pearl, not money. "Oh well. I call Farore's pearl!" the Other Eds and Johnny laughed at Eddy's foolish greed while the Deku tree kept speaking " It is my hope that this pearl shall lead you to a fair destiny."

"You bet it will! 100 rupees and jawbreakers, here I come!" the Deku tree moved on to Makar, "All is well, Makar. Do not cry. Please, play your songs for me, as you always do." Makar looked up and bounced profusely, "Oh, that's right! We must begin our ceremony soon, before the day ends"

"But the sun's already risen." Doubled d pointed to a hole high above the Deku tree that showed the blue sky, but the others ignored him. "I'm sorry to keep you all waiting. Let the ceremony begin!" Makar bounced into the air one more time and pulled out a sky-blue violin and Red berry-lashed bow, both too large for him. He turned back to the Eds, "Oh, Great Eds . . . As my thanks to you, I shall play even harder than I normally do. I hope you enjoy it."

"It should be a real treat!" Double d agreed.

Makar did play well, with a lively Celtic tune that everyone in forest haven danced to, and to which the Koroks and Johnny hummed. Then, when the music reached its end, from its highest branches the Deku tree sprouted large seeds, almost as large as Eddy. "Cool." Ed hummed as they floated down to where several Koroks could grab them. "Great Deku tree, this year you have once again produced some splendid seeds." The Koroks praised the Mighty plant, "With these seeds we will continue to spread new forests across the great sea. Farewell, heroes." And with that the Koroks flew away on their own Deku leaves.

"Well that was a lovely break!" Eddy announced sarcastically as the three heroes left the sacred forest behind. As they neared The King of Red Lions, Ed ran over to a red mailbox shaking in the ground "Mr. Birdieman left us a prize!" Ed Stood in front of the mailbox, "Hello, Mr. Mailbox!"

"Ed, I can reason that maybe a fish can talk, and maybe even a tree," Double d laughed, "But never, by all that is logical, will there be a mailbox that ta-"

"Gooooooood moooorrrrrning!" the mailbox chimed.

"I'm speechless." Double d flatly replied.

"Who's complainin'!' Eddy added, "Got any mail for us?"

"Letters for the Eds? I've got 1 letter!" the red box spat out a piece of paper covered in small writing. It read:

Dear Eds,

If you are reading this letter, it can only mean you have peeked into one of our many postboxes. I am indebted to you. I am very sorry I let you leave without thanking you. Please accept my heartfelt apology along with my thanks. We cannot do much to help you, but we can at least do this: if we ever get any letters or parcels for you, we will deliver it to a postbox near you. If you see any wiggling postboxes, please look inside them. I suppose you have a long way to go before your perilous journey is done. I have included a gift for you with my letter in hope that it might help you. Please accept this small token. I look forward to the day we meet again.

May fortune fill your wings

From Komali's father

As soon as the Eds read the final line, a heart-shaped container fell from it. "Wahoo! Another heart container!" Eddy shouted picking it up. "Actually Eddy, that's only a piece of heart" Double d corrected.

"A piece?!?"

"Yes, but if you collect four more, a new heart container is formed."

"Man, the real world isn't as good as I thought it would be . . ."

"And it's only getting worse." The living boat replied, startling the Eds yet again, "This sacred place has been attacked by Gannon. Could it be that his power is returning?"

"Returning or not, I'm getting sick of him already!" Eddy grumbled.

"Eds, you must get the remaining pearl. It lies in a place northwest of here, we must set sail immediately!"

"You heard the mode of transportation! Let's get going!"


	7. sleepyness & charecter development

Along the way northwest the Eds met up with an unsavory part of their childhood when a treasure ship blocked their path. "Hey hey hey!" Eddy shouted to what seemed to be the one leader of the tiny boat. On the other side of the grappling hook like salvager sat three more men, in diving suits like they're leader. "What's the holdup? We have a schedule ta keep, MOVE IT OR LOSE IT!" the boatmen stayed eerily quiet.

"Eddy, this boat has the right of way, it would be illegal to ram it."

"I love seagulls guys!"

"I knew it girls!" the first of the three divers announced, starting to take off his (Or hers, it was difficult to tell which) helmet off. The other two did the same.

"Wow, first a silver rupee, now this!" the second diver (Definitely a girl) announced in a higher voice. "Today must be our lucky day!" the third said with an odd snort. The Eds reeled back in terror. "It never gets easy, does it?" Eddy asked silently tucking into his tunic. "I suppose it's too late to violate that nautical law." Double d thought out loud as his knees shook. All Ed could do was staring, wide-eyed, at the one thing on earth he truly feared. "Never thought you'd see us again, 'ey boys." Cooed Lee Kanker.

The horror of it all gripped them. "KANKERS!" they shouted together while falling over each other. "S-s-stay back!" Eddy stuttered, backing up until he fell out of the back of the boat into the salty water. "We are warning you!" Ed held up the hero's sword and closed his eyes, hoping some sort of magic would save him. Lee, Marie, and May Kanker stared at the spectacle for a moment before laughing together. "Awww, they still remember our past!" Lee joked, pointing at the Eds. "Past?" Eddy was sopping wet but back in the boat, and Ed started peeking out from between his eyelids. "We made a promise with someone to change," Marie smiled, winking at Double d, "So we did."

"A total reboot!" May gloated. Double d, which at first had been concerned, became surprised instead _Funny, I didn't expect them to keep their promise . . ._

"It's true. We owe 'em our lives, but they'd rather do it the pay-it-forward way." Lee continued, "So we packed up and shipped out ages ago, leaving you guys alone for good."

"So now instead of torturing us . . ." Eddy started to ask.

"We sink people's boats and steal their money." This tossed Eddy into another panic, "You guys are crazy if you think we're giving you our treasure!" He shouted, taking the hero's sword and pointing it again at the Kankers. "Ah, quit you're blubberin'!" Lee pushed the sword away with her finger, "We've already got enough money to live like queens for the rest of our lives, right now all we need's a place to live in luxury." Eddy put down the sword, but jealousy painted his face at such wealth, "Speaking of luxury . . ." Lee reached into her diving suit and fished around for a pocket. When she found it, she pulled out a blue map with an anchor on it, wrapped up with string. Ed gasped "A pretty piece of paper!"

"Actually Ed, that's a treasure chart." Double d opened it and saw that it portrayed an island shaped perfectly like a triangle and winced; he had severe problems with seeing triangles for many years. In the waters near the Eastern point of the isle someone had painted a red X on the map. "It's a little something that couldn't fit in the boat, consider it pay for all the damage we used to do."

"PAYDIRT!" Eddy shouted, grabbing the map and popping the sails open, "To the money!"

"Eddy wait!" Double d shouted over the speeding sails. The Kankers stood in their boat watching the Eds speed off. "Jeez, can't believe we ever loved THOSE clowns!" Lee smiled at her sisters and their rowing slave, an old balding man named Gossack. "I hear ya sis, I never saw how stupid those two could be." May agreed, putting her helmet back on. "At least I fell in love with the hero!" Marie gloated, shaking her shoulders. "Anyway, let's keep looking for a place to crash." Lee ordered.

"How about that island?" May pointed to an island covered in flowers and tall trees with a little cottage on it. Easy chairs lounged around a calm pond and birds sung happily all over it. "Nah, too girly. Remember, we need a place that's comfy yet tough, NEXT ISLAND!"

"EDDY, SLOW DOWN!" Double d screamed for the tenth time before Eddy finally lowered the sails. "You're killing me, Double d." He sighed, "What's wrong now."

"One, we have no idea where this island is, Two, we have a pearl to find, three, I'm concerned; the king of red lions hasn't said a word since the Kankers arrived." The boat came to a stop and the Eds stared at the figurehead. "Mr. Lionking?" Ed poked the mentor and made a shocking discovery, "HIS HEAD IS MADE OF WOOD!!!!"

"It was always made of wood, numbskull. Hey Tomcat, any idea where this island is?" Eddy held the treasure map in front of the lion's motionless eyes. Suddenly it shook and spoke again, "Ahem, I'm so sorry, what was that?"

"HE'S ALIVE!" Ed gave him a hug, which the boat fortunately couldn't feel, "But still made of wood . . ." Ed was left to this mystery.

"So yeah, where's this?" Eddy pointed to the triangle-shaped island and flashed a winning smile. "Oh, um, that! As soon as we get the final pearl that's where we're going, so you can get this treasure then. Until then, on to Greatfish isle!" the boat opened its own sails (Something the Eds' didn't know it could do on its own.) and started sailing again. "Your Majesty?" Double d asked, stepping to the front of the boat, "Why didn't you respond to us at first? Is something wrong?"

"No, nothing is wrong. As to why I was gone-I MEAN, not speaking at first- you will discover this in time. Now, could you be so kind as to turn the wind and the rudder west?"

Double d was still perplexed by the boat's answer, but did what it had asked him to do all the same.

"Man it got dark fast!" Eddy peered over the blackened waves, looking for an island in the distance. Ed yawned, and the yawn traveled through the other Eds and even to the King of Red lions. "Has it occurred to anyone that we haven't slept since leaving Outset?" Double d asked, the bags under his eyes proving his point. "I guess even a great hero cannot save the world without proper rest; as soon as we get to Greatfish lord Jabun will give us shelter for the night." Ed gazed sleepily out at sea and asked: "Mr. Lionking, is Greatfish supposed to be all stormy and ruined?"

"Why, no Ed! It's a sacred island guarded by the spirit of the great sea. Why would it be destroyed in such a manner?"

"Because it is." Ed pointed to an island only a few yards away from the boat. It had dark storm clouds not unlike those of Dragon Roost above it, and looked by all perspectives empty. "What has happened to this place?" The King of Red lions asked him. "Gannon." Double d answered.

Rain came down in gallons over the island, which looked like it had been crushed by a giant invisible hand. "W-What is the meaning of this? The island . . . it is . . ."

"Trashed?" Eddy offered.

"Smashed?" Ed replied.

"Obliterated?" Double d also commented, but continued on, "I think Gannon's trying to send us a message here. And that message is-"

"We are too late." The King of Red Lions continued, "I knew we had precious little time, but I never suspected how little."

"Aww cheer up Kimba! There's still time . . . I think . . ." but Eddy's assurances didn't help. "There's no sign of Jabun, I fear the-"

"**Ho, there Eds!"** A voice called from the skies. Ed recognized it at once, "BIRDIE MAN!"

"Oh dear." Quill tried to pull up and land on a slanted part of the island, but Ed intercepted him with yet another hug. "Ed please, you'll crush my wings!" Ed let go.

"I feel funny."

"Maybe that's the gag wearing off." Eddy told him, "So what brings you to this soggy neck of the woods?"

"I've actually been looking for you. Are you by chance seeking the water spirit, Jabun?"

"Ummm, yes but it appears something has happened to his home. Would you happen to know where he is?" Double d carefully wrung out the top of his hat without taking it off.

"I am sorry to report to you that Jabun can no longer be found here."

"No, Really?" Eddy sarcastically asked while Quill continued, "Just look at how this place has been torn to pieces . . . I suppose this too is the work of the shadow in the Forsaken Fortress."

"Uh, you're a little behind the game there Tweety."

"We know that Gannondorf this."

"It's Gannon Ed. Honestly I don't know where you two get these fantastically inaccurate names from, but I'm sure Quill can shed some light on the situation anyway."

"I can, for I have seen Jabun leave this island before it was attacked in search of a safer abode, and he has found it."

"Great, can you tell us where, 'cause we're a little behind schedule!" Eddy pointed to the storm clouds to make his point.

"That abode is . . . On the island where you were born. On Outset."

"OH NO WAY!" Eddy shouted cheerfully, "WE GET A FAMILY REUNION, GUYS!"

"Not yet we do," Double d reminded him, "We still have a sister, and apparently a whole world, to save!"

"Not to mention a Duck!"

"And yet even if you were to go to Outset now, you would not be able to see Jabun."

"What, he too good for us?"

"Actually, it's because a huge slab of stone covers the entrance to the cave in which he hides."

"Oh."

"In fact, not even the pirates with their mighty ship could get in. . ."

"Ah, yes, and how are the pirates these days?" Double d asked casually.

"Unfortunately, I believe they are up to no good. I thought if anyone knew of your whereabouts, it would be the pirates. I told them this tale without thought of the consequences; I don't know what they hope to get but they immediately set sail for Outset Island and tried to break into the cave."

"Oh dear."

"It is lucky that they could not gain entrance. I have heard that they were last spotted on Windfall island, but doing what, I do not know."

"Maybe it's a key!" Ed offered.

"To a rock?"

"Regardless, if you wish to see Jabun, I think you should search for the pirates on Windfall."

"Back to the island of riches!" Eddy shouted with joy, dragging the two others back to the boat without hearing another word of Quill's.

"I wonder why it's still dark?" Double d asked, when they finally reached Windfall, which took them a few hours.

"Beat's me." Eddy honestly answered.

"Maybe someone turned out the sun?"

"Turned out the sun? Ed that sounds highly illogical."

"Boys, we're here!" Their boat told them. The Eds looked up to see that they were floating beside a giant boat, and even in the dark of the night they could tell that it belonged to the pirates. "Well, land ho." Eddy said quietly.

"I know not what they are researching, but if they are hoping to get their hands on Jabun's sacred gem, I doubt they would tell you anything directly if you asked them."

"Well, duh!"

"Eds, I think you should try and find out what the pirates are up to, without them finding out about you."

"SNEAKY TIME!"

"Ed, you're gonna give us away. Shut your trap!" Eddy whispered clamping both hands on Eddy's mouth. With that the Eds slinked away quietly.

_Now, if I were a low-down thieving pirate trying to get into a stone-covered cave what would I use?_ Double d thought while not paying attention to where he walked right into a wall. "Nice going, Double d!" Eddy chuckled while Double d examined the building. His eyes met a sign over the door with a picture of a bomb over it. "Of course." He whispered and went around to the other side. He pointed to the secret passageway behind the bomb shop he remembered seeing before he read the wayfarer's guide. The Ed's sidled across silently (Ed almost lost his balance but the other Eds saved him.) and climbed a vine wall to a hole on the second floor where the Eds carefully crawled into the building. The Eds peeked over the little ledge over the hole and listened to the pirates' conversation.

"Look, don't be mad at us!" One of the shorter pirate's with glasses said to the tied-up and gagged owner of the shop, "It's not our fault that we absolutely gotta have bombs to get the treasure we're after. How about you just think of it as payback for the nasty little monopoly you've been running here, yeah?"

"Are they going to play monopoly, Eddy?" Ed asked before Eddy and Double d clamped their hands around Ed's mouth. The little man continued, "So I bet you're thinking it was foolhardy to ask pirates to pay such an outrageous price, huh? Yup, I bet you are." He turned to Gonzo, who had just finished tying him up, "I still can't get over that bit of fast-talking you pulled to get that information out of the postman!"

"Huh? Oh! Oh yeah! That was smooth! I tell ya, the minute I set my eyes on that innocent-looking Double-d guy; I just knew he was hiding something back on Outset. So when I saw that postman, I just pretended to be worried about those kids and stuff, and presto! He spills the beans!"

"Good work, Gonzo! Really, just top notch! It's funny though . . . I'm thinking this is maybe the first time you've shown such wit . . . such cunning . . . you know, with your cunning and Miss Tetra's smarts . . . if you two got married and had a kid . . ."

"How barbaric!" Double d whispered, "He's at least twice her-" Ed and Eddy covered his mouth and the word "age died within his throat. Again, the pirates didn't notice them

"That kid would be the greatest pirate to ever sail the seas! Yup, the greatest!" to this Gonzo blushed and scratched the back of his head, "You idiot! Keep your mouth shut," Eddy nodded to this, "Don't be so stupid! Miss Tetra! Are you listening to this nitwit? Can't you dock him some pay or something?" Tetra was leaning on a box underneath the Eds, but they dared not look, lest they be caught, "Quit goofing off, both of you! Keep your childish jokes to yourself and get those bombs back to the ship! The second you're done, we're setting sail for Outset!" Gonzo immediately snapped out of it, "What? We have to leave so soon? But it's been so long since we've been on shore! We need to fill our bodies with some good eating, yeah? How about we grub tonight and shove off in the morning instead?" he immediately picked up on Tetra's glare, "I mean, uh, I-I'm fine either way, of course. It's just the boys were so excited to come to town, and I think it would be awful hard on them to leave so soon. Besides the treasure's not going anywhere!" he turned to the other pirates, who were holding heavy barrels full of bombs, Senza among them, "You're with me, right boys?" they stayed silent, probably to preserve their lives. Tetra looked annoyed by this, "You're all fools, do you know that? You saw that demolished island! You saw the senseless destruction. We have to hurry to Outset or the same thing could happen there!" the one with glasses stepped forward and asked, "Huh? Not to be disrespectful, Miss Dazel,"

_Dazel?_ Double d thought as the pirate kept talking, "But by the sound of things, you're worried more about that island than the treasure." Tetra grabbed him by his blue and white striped shirt and hoisted him up, "One: Don't ever call me by my Middle-name ever again!" Eddy began to snicker, but Double d and Ed covered his mouth, "And two," she dropped him and tuned away, towards the ledge, "Don't be ridiculous! I want, you know . . . the treasure . . ." she got quieter as she spoke, going down to almost a whisper near the end. And then . . . she looked up . . .

The Eds tucked into the shelf as close as the could, but she could still see their green hats, and though they could not see her wink they could easily hear what she said next "All right! Fine! Have it your way! We can leave town tomorrow, you big babies. But we're setting sail at first light, so no sleeping in! Understood?"

"AYE-AYE!" the men shouted with joy for their time off, but the one with glasses and Gonzo stayed behind a moment. "Say there, brother, what was today's password again?" the glasses-wearing one asked. "Mako, are you serious? You forgot already? You're so useless; today's password is Killer whale, Remember? You know Niko won't let you in unless you say it right! Again, it's Killer whale." Mako repeated the password to himself and the final pirated left the bomb shop to the Eds and the still wriggling bomb-shop owner.

When the Eds felt it was safe enough to let each other go Eddy was the first to speak. Well, more like jump into the air laughing, **"DAZEL? WHAT KIND OF STUPID MIDDLE NAME IS THAT? IT DOESN"T EVEN MEAN ANYTHING!" **Eddy continued laughing and Ed even chuckled a bit, mumbling Dazel to himself. But Double d defended this odd name "Oh, sure, coming from a guy whose middle name is _Skipper_!"

"Oh yeah, **Marian!**"

"Yea- wait just one doggone second, why are we even having this argument? WE HAVE WORK TO DO!" the Eds ran from the shop to the pirate ship without haste.

After getting onto the pirate ship (Which was not easy, let me tell you.) they found that the door to the lower decks was locked. When they tried to open it, they were given a riddle from Niko, "What's the only fish to ever appear in _Psycho_?"

"The ki- but the killer whale is not a fish!"

"Just go with it Double d!" Eddy ordered.

"Did somebody say 'Double d?" Niko asked, throwing the door open, the three Eds ran inside and out from the rain.  
But before responding to Niko, Eddy found something else more of interest, "Hey guys! Tetra's room's off-guard!"

"But Eddy, that's trespassing, and a breach of privacy I might add." But Eddy was already inside.

"This is so wrong," Double d mumbled as Eddy filed through her dresser drawers. Ed and Double d followed him inside to make sure he wouldn't break anything. Immediately Double d was amazed with the room and all its surprises. Over her bed hung a sketch of the hero (A bizarre thing for a pirate to own) and a drawing of a triangle-shaped portion of ocean that he turned away from quickly. His eyes fell upon a desk nearby, with a globe of the world on it and a picture of an older woman who looked a lot like Tetra over it. On the desk was a journal bound in blue and written in gold ink. The final entry Read like this:

_Today, a pair of Darknuts killed my mother, the original leader of this great pirate crew. Now, as her daughter, I must take her place. I hope I can do it as well as she could, she was such a strong leader; no one ever said another word against her judgment! I'll always miss her, both as a leader and a mother. But I must be strong, for her memory. I probably won't ever be able to write in this anymore, because I'll see this entry and remember her. But I'll always love her._

Double d tried very hard not to cry on the paper. How someone so strong could become that way after losing someone they loved died so suddenly. This changed everything Double d ever thought about the pirates and their captain, but he didn't have long to reflect on this. "Hey Sockhead! You gonna read that thing or take it!" Eddy had Tetra's jewelry, money and some of her underwear in his pockets. This threw Double d into a rage "EDDY, PUT THOSE BACK!"

"Aww, listen Double d-"

"No, YOU LISTEN! ALL YOUR LIFE YOU'VE BEEN TAKING AND TAKING AND TAKING FROM PEOPLE WHO CARED ABOUT YOU, AND HERE'S A GIRL WHO HELPED US TWICE WITHOUT THOUGHT OF HER OWN GAIN, AND YOU'RE STEALING FROM HER ANYWAY! WHY, TELL THE READERS OUT THERE WHY!" and with a snort Double d's rant was over.

"Jeez, I'm sorry ok? I'll put them back!" he did as he promised and Double d slowly calmed down, "What's gotten into you?"

"Double d sighed, "A diary entry; Let's get out of here."

They came down the same staircase they did before the Forsaken Fortress and found Niko yet again by the light fixtures. "Double d, my old swabbie!" he shouted with delight "So your alive!"

"Of course, why wouldn't we be?"


	8. Zero to hero, just like that

"It's just that all the other pirate's said you got done in by that bird-monster, so I thought . . ."

"Oh please!" Eddy gloated, "If you think some stupid bird can beat us, you've got another thing coming!"

"Never mind what I thought! You're alive!"

"Um, yes well. We're here because we desperately need to-" Double d was stopped by Niko's dirty finger in his line of text,

"I know exactly why you're here: you're here because you missed me so much!"

"Ummm, sure, why not?"

"After you three left I went back to being the bottom rung on the ladder, which is why I'm stuck here while everyone's partying!"

"Aww, cheer up Mr. Niko, there's plenty to be ashamed of!"

"I guess being worshipped by my swabbies ought to cheer me up."

"Worship?" Eddy's lips curled downward, "I don't like the sound of that . . ."

"All right, let's set you to your new test! This one's harder than the last! Good luck, you'll need it swabbie!" the Eds gaped. "This is your test, Double d!" Eddy ordered. Pushing his friend towards the familiar switch on the floor.

"But Eddy I-" when he landed on the switch, the usual platforms didn't rise to his level. "Hey, what gives? How can he cross the hull with no platforms?"

"That's the beauty of it!" Niko shouted, swinging from rope to rope to the other side, just as he entered the cove a barred metal door slammed shut behind him, "Now you gotta free me, but all you get's the ropes!"

"Man, that guy's gonna be getting on people's nerves for at least a century," Eddy announced with odd specification, "Well, show 'em what you can do, Sockhead!" Double d swallowed hard, "I'm doing this to save the world . . . I'm doing this to save the world . . . I'm doing this to save the world . . ." he leapt off the only platform with his eyes closed and through luck caught the first rope. "Go Double d!" Ed and Eddy cheered him along each rope, and despite fearing the fall; he made it across just as easily as before.

"You did it already!?" Niko leapt into the air at the sight of Double d's success, "You're . . . You're incredible!"

"Oh contraire!" Double d replied, "All I did was time the leap right in accordance to the shifts in the waves and readjust my trajectory accordingly. It was my friend's cheering that really did it."

"You're the best swabbie of all time! So . . . As a reward, take these bombs, really, no charge, Just don't tell ANYONE!" he pointed to a chest deeper inside the cove, where the spoils bag used to be. Double d opened the chest and pulled out about thirty bombs from it; more than enough to open Jabun's cave.

"That's pretty courageous of you . . . trying to steal from pirates." Double d wheeled around, looking for the source of the voice, until he saw that it came from his collarbone. "Oh! Ummm . . . Greeting's, Tetra?"

"I guess I should be shocked . . . but I'm more amazed that you three managed to survive after being tossed out of that tower."

"We would have died had not a friend saved us."

"But you haven't saved Ed's sister yet, right?" on the other side of the room Ed and Eddy had fallen asleep, but Ed mumbled "Sarah" several times in his sleep while furrowing his monobrow. "No."

"You guys never give things much thought, do you? You just rush in, never thinking how badly things can go for you. Like just now . . . the only reason you got what you did was because we left a simple-minded little rat like Niko look over things-" This too changed something in Double d, "Listen Tetra: we may not always make the smartest decisions, but we make them for the right reasons. I'd rather be a brave oaf like Ed than a cowardly genius like I used to be. And beyond that, Niko may not be the best pirate- or even the best person overall- but he trusts people, gives willingly and tries to earn his place in the world, and that is his good part. Just like there's a good part in me, in Ed, in Eddy, and even in you. That's the magic of humanity." She was speechless a moment, then

"I'm guessing you're going after Jabun's treasure too?"

"That is what we intended."

"I'll tell you what: No one's ever questioned my judgment and lived to tell about it, but this time I'll let it slide. And while we're relaxing in town and eating our fill, I'll give you and your merry band of men a head start. But don't waste it!"

"Thank you, Tetra."

"You better be quick, kid." The stone darkened and the Eds returned to their own boat. On the way they were supposed to take shifts so each Ed could get some sleep, but Ed kept himself awake, as he did during Double d's conversation with Tetra, so his friends could sleep.

"**All right Double d, truth or dare?"**_ Oh no, not this dream again!_ Double d thought as the words were spoken. He had this dream, more of a flashback really, every once in a little while, usually after doing something good and honest. Probably to remind himself of the price of these things. Beneath him was Eddy's living room, and the Eds (Age seven in this dream) were sitting around a bottle, now pointing at seven-year-old Double d. _I remember this, before me Eddy told us the truth about how he's scared of the dark, and before that Eddy dared Ed to eat a bucket of sand, good times . . . until "I choose dare!"_ the younger counterpart smiled and flicked his straw-blond hair aside.__"OOH!" A younger version of Ed leaned over closer, "Say the dare Eddy, say the dare!"

"**Hmm. . . Let's see . . . gotta be a good one . . ."** the child version of Eddy rubbed his chin and thought, and the older Double d grimaced as he looked out his window and caught sight of the Fairy's forest on top of the island, **"I dare ya to . . . Din-dong-ditch the Kankers!"** _oh, why couldn't I say no? "Sounds dangerous . . . But I suppose I must abide by the rules of truth or dare."_ I was their seventh birthday party, but Double d would remember it for something else entirely.

"**Now, remember: all you have to do is sneak up to the Kanker's door, take their doormat, knock three times and run! We'll be waiting here near the bridge."**

"Don't get caught!' The older Double d floated over it all with horror, _"I'll be back within moments, threshold and all."_ The two Double d's entered the familiar forest and noticed the glow of a large fire, but the young Double d thought little of this: If the Kankers weren't sexually or physically abusing an islander they were torching woodland animals to eat. Double d almost ran away at the sight of the flames, but ran to them when he heard the Kankers screaming; _here we go again._ He leaned over the clearing where he would meet Tetra exactly five years later and met with a horrifying sight. In retrospect it was a sign that Gannon was coming back into power (Though not the first) the Kankers were tied up and shaking by a huge fire, where a Moblin grinned over them and stirred a pot, "Gotta admit, it's been way too long since I've tasted human, almost forget what they taste like." The foul creature laughed, "Well, the water's started a' boilin', who want's to go first?" May Kanker screamed again as the pig-man lifted her over the pot. _Don't do it, Double d, please don't do it!_ But it did no good dwelling on what he could do; his younger self lifted a rock and threw it at the monster's head. It wheeled around and dropped May on the ground, away from the fiery cauldron. _"You leave this island alone!"_ _I have to admit though, I looked awful brave._ The monster grabbed his spear and snorted, Younger Double d grabbed a vine and swung down to the Moblin, Kicking him in the head. When he swung back the monster severed the rope with the end of his knife-like spear . . . along with part of Double d's scalp.

He landed in a heap next to the Kanker's longhouse. "Capture three, get the fourth free!" The Moblin picked up the unconscious and bleeding boy and dragged him towards the pot. The funny thing about this flashback was that the future Double d could see what happened afterwards, how an arrow flew over the ridge and landed in the porcine menace's spine, how it fell to the ground Dead even as another arrow hit him. He could see his father, the same shade of blond as he and strong from years of living in a dangerous world, rush to his son's side and carry him home. He could see his father cutting the ropes that bound the Kankers and hear him whisper, _"It's too dangerous to live in these woods anymore without the fairy's blessing; you must leave them."_ And though he now felt guilty about it, he could also hear himself say to them in flickering consciousness, _"And leave my friends alone, you bullies,"_ before he went limp in his father's arms.

"Please be ok, Double d." Ed sobbed outside of Sturgeon's hut, "Please be ok!" _I will be Ed, just wait and see._ Double d floated by his friends outside. **"This is all my fault, isn't it?"** Eddy grumbled, trying not to cry, **"We'll never play truth-or-dare again!"** Double d shook his head at the sad sight and reentered the hut. There his younger form was lying in bandages with his parents and Sturgeon watching him diligently. Then he groaned and opened his eyes. _"W-what happened?"_ he muttered, wincing at the pain of his injury. His father was sowing together a black piece of material, and his mother was sobbing too much to speak, so Sturgeon answered him, "You did an awful brave thing up there, but I'm afraid it cost you a lot of blood." _As bravery often does,_ "When that Moblin sliced that vine of yours, he took off a part of your scalp . . . in the perfect shape of a triangle."

"_What!"_ the young Double d sat up, feeling the bandages around his head. "Careful, or you'll start the bleeding all over again!"

"_When will I be able to see it?"_

"In a few weeks, if you heal fast. In the mean time you aren't to leave this bed, Understand?"

"_Yes sir. But am I allowed to have guests while here?"_

"Are you kidding? Those two crazy friends of yours have been trying to tear down the door just to see if you're all right! If I don't let them see you're ok, I might not get any sleep tonight!" before the old man opened the door, Double d's father finished sowing the black cloth together and put it on Double d's head, "Here. Those bandage's look pretty bad, I don't want your friend's freaking out over a little scar."

"_Thank-you father. How did you ever become so brave?"_

"All I did was protect someone I cared about; one day you'll do the same."

The other two Eds Sobbed and apologized until Sturgeon finally kicked them out. After about two weeks the wound stopped bleeding and new skin grew over the area. But Double d's blond hair became sparse all over, non-existent over his yellowish triangle-shaped scar. And after that the dreams and memory's faded into the good times that the Eds used to cherish.

"-Pass it around, and there'll no more bottles of Gravy on the wall!" Ed smiled and looked up (Though it was STILL dark), "Hey guys, we're here!" Eddy kept snoring until a wave splashed him in the face "I'm up mom!" Double d woke up before him, but he was slightly annoyed that his labels had come off the boat (The king of red lions held his tongue about how he peeled them off during his sleep.) They flowed into the bay where their oldest memories we're made and climbed up onto the old slippery docks, "Have you three noticed that morning has not broken even after so many hours have passed?"

"It hasn't?" Ed asked stupidly as the boat continued speaking. "It is as if time itself has frozen!"

"If what you're saying is true than maybe we don't need to worry about the pirates overtaking us!"

"Exactly, perhaps it may not be a bad idea for you to visit your hometown and families after such a long time away. We can speak with Jabun afterwards."

"Oh boy, oh boy, Gravy time for Ed!"

"And I'm going after those famous hidden rupees, Sockhead, so don't get too comfortable!"

Double d returned to his own home, not expecting his parents to be there. You see, his parents were traveling inventors, selling various inventions to people across the great sea useful things such as Aryll telescopes. But today they happened to be home. "Eddward, you're alive!" His mother pounced on him as soon as he entered the door. "Don't ever leave us again, please! We could barely stand the thought of losing you these past few days, what we're you thinking?"

"Mother . . . you don't understand, I have to go! Sarah's still trapped at the fortress and there's an evil-"

"It's too dangerous! You remember what happened in the forest, don't you? I'll never let my boy be hurt like that again!"

"Mother, I promise I'll be fine! Really, I've learned how to use a sword against monsters and so much more, I'm-"

"Sword? Monsters?!?" Double d's father looked up from his tinkering on some new device then, "Hercules, talk to your son. I think he's going through that 'hero' phase you went through." {Another note: It's a common tradition for me when playing the Zelda games to name my character Hercules, after the Greek hero. I know his real name is Link, just let me do this, Ok?"} The strong inventor sighed, and got up, "All right Marian. Follow me Edward."

_Odd, father being the man of few words he is almost never has discussions with me . . . and what's this "hero" phase mother's talking about?_ The two emerged from the house onto a deck facing the ocean. "Thank the gods you're ok." The old man sighed. "Father, what did mother mean when she said 'hero phase'?" he sighed again

"Edd, there's something I probably should have told you a long time ago. It's about my own twelfth birthday and how I wasted most of my life."

"For starters I should tell you that you have an aunt."

"I do? Who is she? How come I've never seen her?"

"Her name was Aryll, and she was the best little sister a boy could ask for: Kind, giving, everything Sarah isn't; but she was also kidnapped by the Helmroc king."

"Good lord! How did you save her? I wish you would've told me earlier, you could've helped us sa-"

"That's just it, son. I didn't save her." Double d looked shocked for a moment, but Hercules continued, "I tried three times, twice my boat was destroyed on the way, and the third time the Helmroc King sent me right back here. I never got over it; I was humiliated for the rest of my life. And these days I'm certain she's dead!"

Double d thought again for a moment and looked back at his father, "I think I saw Aryll when I first got to the Forsaken Fortress, alive and well. And to prove she's alive, I'll bring her and Sarah home before either are missed for much longer!"

"You do realize you'll be walking into certain death, right?"

"Realized it the first time I set foot on the cursed island, but someone's got to stand up to the powers of darkness."

"And even if you do somehow survive, you'll wind up just as disappointed and ashamed of yourself as I am when you fail?"

"Then I just won't fail." The middle-aged man smiled at his green-clad son, "I think I can distract your mother just long enough for you to get whatever needs to be done here done. But just in case you might want to hurry." Double d hugged his father for understanding, "Thank you father! I promise I'll return Aryll safely!"

"No problem son- say, is that Eddy?" the man pointed out to Outset's bay area, where Eddy was setting off in the King of Red lions. "What on earth? Eddy!" Double d ran down the staircase of the deck to where the shore began and started swimming towards the boat. "Man, my wife's gonna kill me."


	9. Smaller, shorter, and freaking hilarious

"**You sold all my clothes?!?!?"** Eddy, a few moments before sailing away, shouted at his guilty parents from beyond their doorway. "But- but we thought you we're dead!" his mother pleaded, "And we needed food! So we sold everything, not just your clothes!"

"Yeah, but without my old clothes I'm stuck wearing these!" Eddy tugged at his shirt and tripped over a rock. "Ah, who needs ya? I just go buy my own clothes for once!" and with that he stormed off. _**Let's see if I can find those 100 rupees on my own!**_ In truth there was another reason Eddy went along with his friends on this dangerous, suicidal mission (But the rupees had a larger influence still). Ever since this adventure began Double d's been acting loads braver than he usually does, and Eddy knew that when this was over he'd be remembered as some sort of "Hero". So what's a shameless scammer to do? Cash in on it, of course! But the only way to get the money and the glory is to stick it out to the end. _**If Double d can save the world, than so can I!**_ In truth Double d's courage inspired Eddy to fight this battle. _**So let's see, if I had a hundred rupees and I needed to stash them somewhere safe, where would I stash them? **_ He pondered this while walking across the bridge to the main residences of Outset. _**Of course! Under his house!**_

Eddy crawled under Double ds staircase through a tunnel that led to his cellar. There he found an unlocked chest_** Bingo!**_ In it he found an orange rupee, worth 100 green rupees. But what he heard overhead influenced him more, "Don't ever leave us again, please." That was the loudest part of the conversation, thus all Eddy could hear through the muffling walls. _**Double d's callin' it Quits? Well in that case, I'm outta here!**_

While the King of red lions was asleep he untied it and started sailing away, but then a voice shouted across the waves, "Eddy, stop!" Double d was feebly swimming across the bay while Eddy momentarily stopped. "What on earth's gotten into you?"

"The rupees I found!" Eddy showed the orange treasure to his soaked friend.

"Really? You're abandoning the journey for money?"

"You're one to talk! After all that hero-garbage you've been spouting along the way, you're just gonna walk out on us when you're parent's beg hard enough?"

"W-walk out? What on earth are you-"

"GUYS!" Ed ran across the beach, concern all over his face.

"Ed? Are you alright?" Double d asked, momentarily forgetting about Eddy. Ed stopped at the shore and grabbed the shoreline and gave it a tug, ripping the water in two. The king of red lions fell between the severed waves and Double d stared unbelievingly. "Trouble! Bad! Jimmy! SCARY!" Ed leapt into the boat and shook a little. "Suck it in Ed, Double d's got something he wants to tell us!"

"Eddy, I think there's been some sort of misunderstanding. My father's given me his blessing to carry on with this journey."

"Look, if you want to go on, that's fine. But I'm out. I found my money and I'm sick of throwing myself into danger! Now put the sea back together Ed."

"But what about the sea chart?" Double d asked, "and 'teaching that overgrown seagull a lesson?" Eddy stopped and looked back at his friends, knowing they had a point.

"Let's sing a song!" Ed shouted.

"That's stupid, Ed."

"Actually Eddy, that seems like a good idea. We've been long overdue for a song-based interlude."

"Fine I'll sing, but I won't like it. So what're we singing about?"

"Well, umm . . . how about the hero of time?"

"That old guy? What's he gotta do with us?"

"Plenty! I'll show you . . ." Double d took out the windwaker and started playing a tune, 'What would Brian Boitano do?' to be precise. And began improvising the words: {I'd recommend playing the song while reading this part. Also, the singer's fonts are the same as during the flashback. Try and keep up!}

"What would the old hero do, if he were here right now? He'd make a plan and he'd follow through, that's what the Hero would do!"

"_When the hero was in the kokiri, fighting Queen Gohma, he used the Kokiri slingshot and he killed her in three shots!_

_**And when the hero was on Death Mountain, fighting Dodongos, he used the near-by bomb flowers to kill his dragon foes!**_

**So what would the old hero do if he were here today? I'm sure he'd bash a beast or two, that's what the hero would do!**

**I only care about money; it's my only reason for living.**

And I just want my mom, not to punish her bad son.

_For Tetra I'd be an activist too, 'cause that's what the hero would do!_ Suddenly the music stopped, "What'd you say, Double d?" Eddy asked.

"Erm . . . nothing! Let's continue on with the song, yes?"

_**And what would the old hero do, He'd call all the kids around. And tell them to unite for truth, that's what the hero would do!**_

**Did someone say my name?**

Who are you, Mr.?

**Al Gore!**

What? Sorry Mr. We were singing about the real hero!

Indeed, you're not even scheduled to make an appearance in this fan fiction.

_**Oh, **__**Damn conservative author . . .**_

**When the old hero traveled through time, to when all seemed at an end, he fought the evil desert-king to save the kingdom once again.**

_**And when the hero was in the forest, he beat up the skull-kid!**_

'**Cause the hero'll never be beat by ANY-BODY . . .**

**So let's all pull together, and unite to stop Gannon! And we'll save Sarah and Aryll too, 'cause that's what the hero would do.**

**And we'll save Sarah and Aryll too, 'Cause that's what the hero would Dooooooo, CAUSE THAT'S WHAT THE HERO WOULD DO!**

"_Hold it, hold it, HOLD IT!" Eddy looked back at Double d, "Who the heck's Aryll?"_

"_My long-lost aunt, the one who inspires the telescope and lookout's names. And as of now I will not rest until she too is freed from the Forsaken Fortress!"_

"_Ok, but what about the part with Tet-"_

"_Um, Ed! You said there was something wrong with Jimmy?" _

"_Jimmy? JIMMY!" Ed grabbed Double d by the wrist and dragged him to the shore. "Wait Ed! What about the water?" Ed looked back and smiled, he ran to the run-aground boat and lifted it up onto the right side of the split-waters, with Eddy still in it. Then he took the split bay and slammed it together again, causing a bizarre mountain of water. "Hardly noticeable Ed. Coming, Eddy?"_

"_Yeah, be there in a sec!" Eddy piloted the still-sleeping raft to the shore, thinking about the money he had yet to find out there _**I'll quit later!**


	10. BOB SAGET!

"_Sarah?" Jimmy looked horrible. His eyes were clouded over, as if blind, and his skin was pale and clammy. He shivered constantly and hallucinated. "My word, what's happened to him Sturgeon?"_

_"Not sure, but whatever it was it took hold of him not long after you left. Poor boy, his days are filled with worry, and his nights are filled with horrific dreams."_

_"Eds," Jimmy muttered, to no one in particular, "Don't leave, you'll die!"_

_"Jimmy, we're right here! Don't despair."_

_"Yeah, snap out of it!" Eddy shook Jimmy's shoulders with no avail. _

_"Heh, that won't work! I know, I've tried!" Sturgeon stepped forward with a map of the fairy forest, "but I do know something that might…" _

_"WHAT ARE THESE THINGS?" Eddy hit several satyr-like creatures with a boomerang while Ed slashed them with the sword. "They're called miniblins, and I have a feeling we'll be seeing more of them from here on out."_

_"Miniblin or not, I'm getting' sick of all these mother-_

_"Careful Eddy, we need to-"_

_"Monsters on the mother-"_

_"Maintain a T-"_

"_ISLAND!"_

"_Rating. Regardless, according to Sturgeon's instructions and what we saw the last time we we're here, we need to get close to the Kankers depression, blow up the rock on the fairy fountain, and bottle a fairy."_

"_Welcome to Singapore!"_

"_Whatever Ed, just cut this grass." Ed did as he was told, but as Eddy collected the rupees, he panicked, "THIS ONE WON'T FIT, DOUBLE D!" Double d looked at the wallet and sighed, "It's full Eddy. This wallet can only hold 200 rupees at one time; you'll need a bigger one if you want to hold more money."_

"_Full? 200? Bigger one? NO MORE MONEY!" Eddy curled up into a fetal position in the cut grass._

"_Oh Dear. Eddy looks Deranged; Ed, help me carry him to the fountain._

"_I'm almost there, Double d!"_

"_Umm, yes." _This keeps going from bad to worse!

_The two sane Eds finally got their friend to the rock. Ed placed a bomb near the rock, hid behind a log and plugged his ears with Double d. the fuse of the bomb ignited, the whole bomb glowing red-hot before blowing the rock to fragments. Where it sat a hole was revealed, "Thank goodness we had bombs. But just in case we might want to restock on them before going to Jabun."_

"_Don't worry your little sock, Double d," Ed pulled out another bomb, "'cause these little dickens pack a punch!" with that it exploded and knocked Ed's Eyebrow and Eyes to one side. They pushed Eddy into the hole and each dived in as well._

"_My word." Was all Double d could see when he saw the fairy fountain's interior. Everything except the Night-sky background was bathed in a pale blue. "Look, Double d! It is Bobo!" Ed pointed to a giant clamshell on the wall. "I highly doubt Rolf's pet clam is part of the interior decoration, Ed. But look, a fairy!" the fairy floated over a pool of water before spiraling into it, causing an explosion for some reason. When the dust cleared a large woman was standing in the pool, causing Double d to be shocked. The woman had four-arms, dark-red skin and a white dress and hat of some odd sort, "Young waker of the winds, allow me to aid you in your quest." The Great fairy folded her lower hands into a praying position while the upper ones both made the "Ok" symbol. Suddenly her lower hands opened, revealing a lotus. She blew the petals onto the Eds, which caused a wallet to materialize and land on Eddy's face. Eddy sniffed the bag on him and sat up, "This holds money. A LOT OF MONEY!" he smiled, reading the inscription near the blue-rupee symbol "200/1000! WAHOO!" then he looked at the fairy, "Who's the dame?"_

"_This is a Great fairy, I've read about them."_

"_The fairies of this fountain will ease your Weariness, when you grow fatigued from your battles, come here to be refreshed." And with a laugh she disappeared, leaving several fairies behind. Ed bottled one and the three made their way back; Eddy taking every rupee he could find._

"_Ok Jimmy, this'll fix you right up!" Eddy pulled at the stopper a bit with his hand to no avail, then tried harder before resorting to his teeth. "May I?" Double d twisted the cork a little and it popped right off. The fairy flew upward around Double d and down to Jimmy. The color came back to his skin, a twinkle returned to his eyes. If literal sparkles and rainbows were a part of everyday life, I could guarantee they'd be there. "Oh Eds! It's you, YOU'RE ALIVE!" Jimmy jumped up and gave a painless hug. "Easy there, fluffy!" Eddy warned limply._

"_You're safe! That's wonderful!" he backed up and smiled, "You healed me, didn't you? The others were wrong about you, you are heroes!"_

"_The others had their doubts?"_

"_THEY ALL SAID YOU WE'RE GONNA DIE, but they were wrong! You and Sarah are trying to be so strong, and here I am getting sick."_

"_Then get a sword and help us!" Eddy offered, but that only scared Jimmy, "Who, me? But I'm just a poor soul, unable to fight anything! But I have been improving my culinary talents!" Jimmy pulled out a ladle of soup and poured it into the now-empty bottle humming as he did so, "There we go! This soup will bring back your energy and give you a touch of magic! It'll also make you twice as strong as ever!"_

"_Smells like home cookin'!" Ed commented, taking back the bottle._

"_There's enough for two servings, so go out there and bash that bird!"_

"_Yes sir!" The Eds were about to leave when Jimmy called them back, "I also wanted to tell you: I named the little piggy Double d, after you! If you feed him, he's bound to give you something!"_

"_Pig treasure? What're we waitin' for?" the Eds left Jimmy's house, where a massive pig greeted them._

"_Little piggy got big." _

_"Allright, while me and Ed try and get some rupees out of this porker, how 'bout fillin' up our bomb bag." Eddy handed the bag to Double d along with twenty rupees._

_"But Eddy, what about our mission to save the world from Ganon? He could decide to drown all that we love in a moment's notice. We sang an entire song about it!"_

_"Relax Double d, we can't bring down Ganon without bombs." He held up his now-treasured 1000 rupee wallet, "Besides, I could go for some payment for my effort!"_

_Double d took the bomb bag and trotted away towards Beedle's shop ship, only looking back to see Eddy using Ed (And technically Double d) to get himself more rupees. He sighed, _Edd, why must you be so self-centered?

_"Yo-ho, yo-ho, A PIRATE'S LIFE'S FOR ME!" the chorus carried from inside the floating shipto the beach easily, even though the boat was at the end of the dock. _Odd, Beedle almost never sings in public. _"Beedle?" Double d stepped inside and found the place a wreck. empty bottles were lying everywhere, and Beedle's goods were all over the floor, the only thing on his shelves were bombs. Beedle looked even worse; his bowler cut was all askew, his whole face a light red (Mostly the nose and cheeks), he had no pants on. "GOOD LORD MAN, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?" Double d helped the stumbling man to his feet._

_"Me? Never-ever-forever better."Beedle repled, falling over again, "So, here for the sale sack top - tock flap - clack cap."_

_"Sock hat?" Double d corrected._

_"Don't you sass me, boy!"_

_"Beedle, I'm afraid to ask this, but are you perhaps drunk?"_

_"Who wouldn't be after the sale of the year! With these bombs I'll be able to retire, and it's all thanks to that Petra girl."_

_"I believe you mean Tetra, Beedle." _Tetra's stimulating the economy? That's new for pirates . . . and very out of charecter considering the fact that Nayru's pearl is worth more fisically than all the bombs she could possibally sell. What's her motive for this, there's no rhyme or reason to it it's so . . . un-piratelike.

_"You know her don't you, I can tell by your blushing."_

_"Wha- blushing?" Double d rubbed his face, making it only redder, "I really think you've had too much to drink, you're hallucinating!" Double d knew alcohol usually doesn't cause hallucinations, but what did Beedle know?_

_A lot, apparently, "Admit it, there's something there. She told me specifically to come here and sell you these bombs at half regular price should you or the other Reds come along. What kind of wierd name is the Reds anyway? You all wear Green!"_

_"That's cause we're called the Eds, not the Reds," Double d set down the twenty rupees and took about five bombs, "Besides, we hardly know each other! We've only spoken to each other a grand total of eight times and each time was benign and buisness orientated. All she knows about me is that I'm a pacifistic rescuer for my best friend's blood relation and otherwise a book worm and a coward. Bookworms and pirates aren't a good mix!"_

_"Well then what do you know about her?" Beedle took a big sip of a bottle lying on the floor next to him, "You must know something about her from those conversations."_

_"Only that she's impolite, bossy, especially towards men, impulsive, reasonable, somewhat selfless, mericful towards helpless idiots, stoic, fearless, helpful, clever, direct, terrifying, in a way, burdened with an embarassing middle name, tramatized by a horrible expieriance as a child, mericless to her crew, apparently generous to people in green tunics and pants and- no, wait, she didn't technically tell me about her tramatizing expiriance; I wound-up reading her diary once."_

_"Aaaaaaand the defence rests!" Beedle wailed with a flurry before passing out._

_"But that doesn't mean I feel anything in particular for her or that we have anything good in common!" Double d barked at the snoring shopkeep before leaving the shop._

_"Hey, Double d!" Held out a handful of treasures when he arrived, still shaken by the discourse, "We found tons of rupees, and magic bars, and even a buried Jawbreaker . . . but Eddy ate it already."_

_"That's nice Ed."_

_"What's with you?" Eddy asked as the walked back down to the dock._

_"It's just Beedle. When I got to his shop he was compleately inebriated. I didn't even know videogame charecters could get intoxicated!"_

_"Well, if they could get away with it in the end credits of Ocarina of Time, they sure can here." _

_"Then he started raising some prattle about the pirates, mostly Tetra. He was raving, I tell you!"_

_"Really?" Eddy squinted at his friend, "What did he say exactly that got you so ticked off?"_

_"It doesn't matter__ now. Let us meet with Jabun at once." The Eds climbed into their talking boat and sailed to the western side of the island. "Your majesty, how will we know Jabun's whereabouts __compared to the rest of the island?"_

"_It will have a giant whirlpool in front of It." the Eds stared at the boat before screaming, "That's it, I'm off!"_

"_This is really something you should've told us about before we started sailing."_

"_Pickles come from China Mr. Boat!" just then the dinghy was pulled roughly to one side, the Ed's held on tight as the vortex pulled them in slowly. _

_"Ed, do something!"_

"_KILL IT WITH BOMBS!" Ed pulled a cannon out of the floor (One Double d and Eddy did not know they had.) and started shooting the island. "Ed, I MEANT THE WHIRLPOOL!"_

"_Oops." But a hole was starting to form in the rock wall. "No Ed, keep shooting the rock!" Ed did as he was told, and shot the stone barrier until even the last rock fell away, moments before the Eds were sucked away. The whirlpool stopped just then, "Why'd the whirlpool stop?"_

"_Eddy, these days I have ceased asking questions about this weird world, I advise you to do the same." The Eds sailed into the cave, thankful to be alive and together._

"_It's tiny in here." Ed laughed stupidly as the water rose before them, a ball of white light in the center of it, "Odd, where's Jabun?" suddenly the water broke, a giant black fish stared down at the boat curiously. Hanging from its hook was a lantern-like device. "__" the Fish spoke in the same ancient language as Valoo and the Great Deku tree. While the Eds stared quietly, the king of Red lions spoke in a language both they and the fish could understand, "Well met indeed, Jabun. I am pleased to see that you are safe."_

* * *

"_Yes, there can be no other explanation for the destruction of your island except for Ganon. He has returned."_

* * *

"_Unfortunately, that is not so."_

* * *

"_These boys have no connection to the legendary one, and yet I sense great promise in the courage they posess."_

* * *

"_I Do. It is the only way."_

" " _the giant fish shook its lantern until a blue orb fell from it to Double d's hands._

"_Finally, this quest is coming to a close." He sighed, polishing Nayru's pearl, the one representing wisdom._

"_Sarah, big brother is almost there!"_

"_Let's go boys! Later Jaballo!"_

* * *

"_So that foul wind and rain and endless night were indeed elements of a curse from Gannon. He must intend to cast this land into darkness for all time."_

" " _the sentient boat thought a moment and then replied, "I think I already have." _

" " _the boat sailed away, leaving the Great fish to watch people do stupid things on Tru TV._


	11. Sing the bells of Notregods

"_What did Jabun say, your majesty?" Double d asked as they sailed away. "You'd rather not know. He . . . has tourettes."_

"_Interesting."_

"_Yawn. Where to next, o' king of the jungle and sea?"_

"_Gannon's curse has been broken by the power of the pearl Jabun gave us, so morning should come soon."_

"_The sun'll come out tomorrow Guys!"_

"_I'm not going to ask how that makes sense, but ok."_

"_So where we headed?"_

"_I have marked the places we must go on the map, once we get there each of you must set a pearl on its respective perch, proving that you are willing for the journey ahead."_

"_Well, that doesn't sound too difficult-"_

"_Also, you must ascend a dangerous, monster-filled tower. Are we ready?"_

"'_Bout as ready as I'll ever be." With that the Eds sailed to the first island, one diagonal from Outset._

_(Some time later)"Uh, Double d? Look." Eddy pointed ahead of their boat where a Giant cyclone spun across the sea. Double d took out his telescope and stared at the top of it, "just as I thought. It seems we've found Cyclos."_

"_You mean Zelda's brother?" the other two Eds stared at Ed until they started laughing uproariously. "Zephos Ed. Goodness, this is no time for laughing! We need to get past him. Ed, Close the sails. When I say 'now', open them so we can sail past him." The cyclone span back and forth across the water while Eddy and Double d watched, "I know I could take that Guy, if only I had the chance."_

"_Perhaps later Eddy, but right now we ne-"_

"_HERE WE GO!" Ed opened the sails and the Eds sped into the cyclone._

"_NOT NOW, ED!" Double d shouted as the winds carried their boat into the cyclone and out into wherever Cyclos would fling them._

"_AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" The Eds landed with a splash near a triangle-shaped island. "THAT STUPID FROG!" Eddy shouted, pacing on their boat, "Next time I see him I'll give him what's coming!"_

"_You're the man, Eddy." _

"_AND AS FOR YOU," Eddy was seething, "WHAT WAS THAT? YOU FELL FOR THE OLDEST TRICK IN THE BOOK!" Eddy grumbled more before turning to the island "NOW LOOK WHERE WE ARE!"_

"_Actually Eddy, Ed has warped us to northern triangle island, where Din's pearl will soon preside." _

"_Oh, is that so? Well in that case, Ed, go drop off that pearl."_

"_And please don't-"_

"_WHAT?" Ed had at one point or another ripped his pocket off and was sucking on both it and the Pearl. Eddy shoved Ed's mouth opened, grabbed the pearl, and put it in Ed's hands, "Pearl, island, resting place, NOW!" Ed whimpered and stumbled onto the island, where Double d promised to return for him._

"_Well, here we are eastern triangle island."_

"_Took us long enough." Eddy grumbled, sliding off the King of red lion's head, "After we do this, it's straight to the Hidden treasure." Eddy grabbed the map roughly and read it, studying the red X and the island's shape. When he glanced over it, he nearly had a heart attack. He looked at the map, the island, and back at the map again before shouting "We're right on top of the treasure!" Eddy dove into the water without second thought. "Eddy wait!" Double d dove in after him and dragged him mumbling on board. "The Kankers left instructions on how to salvage treasure." Double d unfolded the small piece of paper and the two read about gathering treasure with the grappling hook. Eddy rigged it to the salvage arm, cranked it hastily into the water and pulled up a heavy steel box._

"_Wonder what's in it?"_

"_Perhaps a treasure of ages long past or a source of-"_

"_Nope, it's 200 rupees!" Eddy stuffed the silver prize into his pocket and finally made his way to the island itself. "I'll be back to take us to the temple soon Eddy."_

"_Screw the temple, I have money!" Eddy mumbled just quiet enough for Double d not to hear._

"_Are you ready, Double d?" The king of red lions asked, floating not far from southern triangle island, ready to climb onto it. "I'm not sure." He gulped, shaking at the intimidating Sea-hats flying around the lonely island. "Double d, after all you've been through, you'll let these small creatures stop you, and you've faced far worse"_

"_I know, but this whole time I've been scared. I've tried looking brave, but I still remember that night in the forest each time I see a monster."_

"_And yet you fight, which makes you far braver than many other like you."_

"_I guess you're right." Double d sailed through a gauntlet of angry monsters, almost twice being knocked off his boat and the island. When he finally arrived on the island and climbed to its highest point, a statue sat with open arms to the sea. Its blue eyes began to glow with a holy light "What on earth?" Double d asked as it spoke to him in a hoarse voice, "wandering traveler who seeks the guidepost of the goddess . . . place the pearl you hold here." Double d reached into his hat (Without taking it off, of course) and produced a bright blue orb, adorned with Nayru's crest. He placed it in the statue's hands. The entire world grew dark around the statue and Double d, except for the mystical blue orb. "Well, now what?" Double d asked the universe before a rumbling began on the island. The statue shined with light-blue light through small cracks in it making a horrible hissing noise. "O dear!" Double d Dove to the lower part of the island to avoid whatever would happen next. Then as soon as it started, the rumbling and noises stopped. _What was that all about?_ Double d wondered as he stepped back up to where the statue was. With a loud BANG the statue exploded, sending our hero screaming through the air. In its place stood the image of Nayru, holding the pearl high so a holy blue light could shine in the same direction Double d was heading: Eastern triangle island._

"_Stupid frog." Eddy growled on his little island. He had already put Farore's pearl in its rightful place and was now growling at the world, a common stress reliever for him. "Stupid brother, stupid Kevin, Stupid Helmroc king, __**stupid Gannon!" **__Eddy pulled up several flowers and strangled them, "When we get this 'power to vanquish evil' you guys are-"_

"_EDDY!!!!" Double d landed on the statue of Farore, shaken but alive._

"_Where'd you come from?"_

"_Not important! The pearls cause the statues to explode! Remove it at once!" Eddy and Double d tugged at the pearl without budging it an inch. "What is it, __**glued**__ in there?" Eddy shouted with frustration as the blue light finally made its way to the island's statue. "Eddy . . .Run." Double d warned too late. Before either boy could take a step, the light hit the second statue, causing it to explode into Farore and send both a green light and the Eds flying towards Northern Triangle Island._

"_Here we go!" Ed announced, trying to balance Din's pearl on the statue's head. "Tricky." While trying to do this, the other two Eds landed near the statue's feet. "HI Guys!" Ed shouted happily, letting go of the Red pearl, where it rolled off the statue and onto the grass. "Ed you idiot!" Eddy picked up the pearl and smirked, "You don't put the pearl on its head, you put in its hands!"_

"_NO EDDY!" Double d warned at the pearl was put irreversibly into the statue's hands. "Oops." The green light of Farore hit the now-activated statue of Din, sending the Eds flying towards the Center of the three Triangle islands. Why they flew screaming there, Din's read light shined south to Nayru's statue. When the three lights connected together, a massive triangle, composed of three smaller Yellow triangles and a triangle-shaped blank spot, glowed on the ocean. These triangles spun and grew smaller towards the open sea in the center of the islands. There a powerful light climbed from the waters into the sky, and from this light rose a giant gray tower with a ring of arches near the bottom, water pouring from holes on the side. This is what the Ed's hit, the Tower of the Gods._

_Just like the siege of the Forsaken Fortress, the Eds peeled off the tower and fell into the bay below. But this time the King of red lions was there to pull them from the water. "Where'd this hotshot tower come from?" Eddy asked, staring at the marvel. "This tower, which the pearls of the Gods caused to appear, is a place that the gods of the ancient world prepared so that they might test the courage of men."_

"_But I am not a man, I'm a monster hunter!"_

"_And I am but a boy."_

"_And I'm a rich guy!"_

"_You'll go in there and you'll like it! The gods will acknowledge only one who can overcome the trials that await here as a true hero. Only then will that hero be permitted to wield the power to destroy the great evil."_

"_Now we sound the drums of war! For Sarah." Ed opened the sail with a gleam in his Eyes as Double d turned the winds towards the tower, "time to fulfill my promises, to my father, to Ed, to everyone I've met along the way." He smiled confidently._

"_Well, we gotta do what we gotta do." Eddy mumbled slightly as their boat sailed into the half-sunken tower._

_The tower itself was a test of the Courage of each of the Eds ant their resolve to fight Gannon. Since the tower was underwater for centuries, the Eds would often enlist the help of the king of red lions to traverse it. Unfortunately, there was no wind inside, not to mention the water rose and fell throughout the endeavor. Unlike other temples and Dungeons the Eds had crossed before, this one was ornate and royal, covered in gold and marble. But make no mistake, the tower of the gods was a monster filled deathtrap, as the Eds discovered in one particular room._

**Man, look at Ed, smashing monsters again.**_ Ed slashed through a skull that had previously been on fire while Double d returned from the room ahead, bringing with him yet another statue. _**And look at double d, solving puzzles like they're nothin'! I wish I could do something cool around here. **_While it's true Eddy had been able to stop several monsters with his boomerang, it still felt like he was dead weight. "For now we can leave the statue here." Double d instructed, setting the Grimacing piece of stone down on a glowing pink spot, "But in the next room I believe we're due for a big fight."_

"_Do we haft to?"_

"_I'm afraid so. There's no other way to get the statue across." The Eds swung from one side of the room the directly right side, where a door had just been unlocked. After the three entered, more steel bars covered the exit. Standing in the center of a moss-covered room was an armored knight, with a massive sword. "Cool!" Ed shouted, running to what he thought was a statue. "NO ED!" Double d shouted, following Ed as the Darknut came to life, "Two of these monsters once-" He started as the beast swung its sword at them, knocking them both out._

"_Oh man." Eddy Ran over to where his friends lay unconscious and tried to shake either one awake. "Wake up you clowns!" The hulking beast loomed over him, "I can't do this alone." Then Eddy saw the hero's sword lying not too far away, _**maybe I can.**_ Eddy Picked up the sword and faced the Darknut, remembering what Orca taught him long ago. When the Hulking monster readied his sword to strike, Eddy leapt over him and knocked off his helmet. While it was confused he slashed off its armor as well. From then Eddy fought bravely, taking a few hits now and again from the monster's sword. But eventually it fell to Eddy's pent-up rage and courage. "Who's the man with the plan?"_

"_Eddy?" the two formerly unconscious Eds asked._

"_Got that right, here's you go Ed." Eddy handed the sword back to him after raiding a near-by chest. "No more foolin' around from little Eddy!" He said, producing a Bow and Quiver that would serve him and the Eds greatly the rest of their quest, as Eddy proved to be quite the marksman._

"_We're almost done here fellows." Double d announced as they stepped out of the tower onto a staircase that led to what would be the top of the tower, "Just one more monster to face and then we can save Sarah."_

"_SARAH!" Ed shouted, trying to jump off the Tower before the grappling hook tied around his waist stopped him._

"_Geez Ed, are you gonna do that the whole Fic?"_

"_Probably." Ed smiled as they passed several Beamos (pillars that shoot lazars) and a few Kagorocs to where the door to the final boss waited. "Here we go again." Eddy sighed as Double d unlocked the door. But the room was empty . . . and dark. "Who forgot to pay the electric bill in here?" Eddy laughed as a voice stopped him, "You have done well to find your way to this place." The voice came from a lighted part of the wall, where the image of two hands and a statue face could be seen, "Oh chosen one . . ."_

"_Chosen one? Don't you mean 'chosen ONES?" The voice ignored Eddy, "Please accept this final challenge."_

"_Bring it on!" Ed shouted as the room became lit a bright green. The hands on the wall detached and revealed eyes in its palms, along with the head and its glowing Red eyes. Eddy reacted to this by shooting one of the eyes in the palm of its hands. That caused it to go limp, which only encouraged him to do the same with the other hand, "This is easy!" _

"_I'm willing to bet that after shooting the hands the eyes would be next."_

"_Sing a song of sixpence!" Ed shouted as Eddy shot one eye, but the Monster shut its eyes and shot fireballs from its mouth. The Eds dived out of the way, but Double d jumped into an electrified ravine in the floor no one noticed. "Ok, perhaps this may be a challenge." He coughed up some smoke when Eddy and Ed pulled him out. But once he got out and Eddy shot out the other eye, the statue head fell with its mouth open. "EAT BOMBS FLYING DEMON!" Ed shouted, throwing a bomb into its mouth, causing a slight explosion and some viable damage._

_The fight continued that way for a while. Double d would act as a decoy or go to gather arrows while Eddy and Ed fought with bombs and arrows. Since it was made of stone, their sword was of no use to them. And even though it rained fire on them and tried to push them into the electricity, they somehow survived and defeated it. The giant head sighed out smoke and said, "The path can now be opened, oh chosen one."_

"_CHOSEN ONES!" the three Eds barked at the defeated automaton. "What will now come to pass is tied to your fate- the path you have chosen. Go forward with caution." The statue floated back to its place while a pink light shown from a hole in the roof of the room. Before the Eds departed, the statue sneezed out a heart container that Eddy collected before stepping into the light._

"_Well, that was interesting." Double d sighed as they appeared on the true roof of the tower. "Yeah, and it took forever!" Eddy griped, pointing at the setting sun._

"_Hey look!" Ed pointed at a silver bell on top of a pedestal, "Are we in Notre Dame, Double d?"_

"_I don't think so," He said, taking out the grappling hook and stepping towards it, "But it may hold the secret to the power to vanquish evil." He climbed up a ladder while the other two Eds watched; he latched onto the bell with it and swung back and forth, causing it to ring deeply across the sea. Each time it rung, Ed would shout "Sanctuary!" loudly, but that is not important. What is important is that it caused a bright light to shine in the arcs beneath the tower, into the depths below. "Hey Double d, I think you were right about the whole 'find the power' thing."_

_Double d stopped ringing the bell and stepped near the edge, where the light was just a pinprick. _

"_MOVE TOWARDS THE LIGHT!" Ed shouted, grabbing his friends and jumping off the tower. Once again, the Eds somehow survived and the king of red lions waited for them patiently. "You have done well, Eds." The boat said as soon as they were in._

"_Glad you think so!" Eddy responded._

"_It would seem the gods have acknowledged you to be true heroes."_

"_We need a hero, we're holding out for a hero till the morning light!" Ed started to sing before Eddy stuffed his hat in his mouth._

"_But this does not mean your trials have ended here."_

_Of course not, we still need to save Sarah."_

"_And Aryll too, cause that's what the old-"_

"_Yes I know, but there's more to it than that. Once you take your first step into the world beyond the ring of light you see shimmering in the waves before you . . . your true trial will begin."_

"_Well, let's get going! The world ain't gonna wait!" the four friends floated into the light, where their boat began to sink._


	12. The stunning conclusion or not

_They drowned._

_The End._

_{Ok, I'm just kidding! this is how it really played out.}_

"_GOOD LORD, WE'RE GOING TO DROWN!" _

"_No we're not, sockhead. Didn't you read the last sentence up there?" they floated down a tube of light into the depths of the sea. "Hey guys, we can breathe underwater!" Ed shouted happily, imitating a fish. Eddy and Double d stared amazed and let out their breaths of air, surprisingly not drowning. They kept floating down to where the world seemingly lost its color, to what appeared to be an ornate castle under the sea. "Good lord."_

"_Who put the castle here?"_

"_We've got no troubles, life is the bubbles!" Ed sang stupidly as the boat landed in a small pool of water . . . underwater. "I really wish we still had logic." Double d sighed as they stepped out of the boat onto the castle steps. "Where are we anyway?" Eddy asked, looking around to what must be bays and hills beyond the castle._

"_Unfortunately, there is no time for me to explain it to you now."_

"_Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this!"_

"_Once you are able to strike down Gannon with the item you claim in this castle, all will be made clear to you."_

"_And away we go" Eddy announced, heading into the castle with his friends close behind._

"_This place has got to have rupees!" Eddy announced, stepping into a main chamber, "Whoa!" He barked as a moblin leaned over him, spear ready to strike. _

"_Stay back contemptible cretem!"_

"_Umm, it's cretin, Ed. And it would seem it is frozen in time."  
"Frozen in time?" Eddy poked it on the snout a few times, to find that is was stone cold. "Guess it's time to have some fun!" he shouted, pulling out several markers and crayons. While the Ed and Eddy Drew Graffiti (Appropriate or otherwise) on the Moblins and Darknuts, Double D wandered the corridors and hallways of this place, staying far away from the moblins in case they came to life soon. He noted the statue of the hero of time, the same three-part triangle he saw almost everywhere recently that made him shiver, a painting of a kingly man with a beard, and one painting that caught his eye._

"_Ed, Eddy, You're not going to believe this!" the other Eds reluctantly left their place from drawing faces on the moblins to where Double d was pointing. "What's my brother doin' on that thing?" Eddy asked, pointing at a painting on the wall. "Look, it's Mr. Niko!" Ed pointed to another part of the picture. "And Mako, and Gonzo, and Zuko and Nudge too! But what on earth does it mean, and who's the girl in the center?"_

"_Probably some modeling dame from LA. But still . . .weird."_

"_SANTA!" Ed shouted running to the other picture, on the other side of the hallway. He sat in front of it and started asking for random chicken and gravy-based things for Christmas. "Get over it Ed, its July! Besides we've got a job to do!" the Eds wandered to the center of the room, where several blocks sat around the triangle-image on the floor. The pirate charm began to shake on Double d, but instead of hearing Tetra's voice, he heard the king of red lions. "The item you seek is hidden somewhere in this castle. To find it, you must use the entrance to the basement."_

"_Ok, where's the basement?"_

"_It has been blocked by a mighty threshold, firmly sealed to prevent evil from gaining access."_

"_So how do we enter, your majesty?"_

"_The entrance is the same as the herald near where we arrived at the castle." And with that the stone went silent._

"_Well THAT was helpful!" Eddy growled, looking around for a basement door. Double d pondered what the Boat had said, looking at the floor in front of him, and the three Triangle-shaped blocks near them. "Eddy, that's it! We need to form a triangle in the center of the floor using these blocks."_

"_Why didn't I think of that?"_

"_Because you can't triforce, Eddy!" Ed Teased, pushing one of the blocks to its place in the center of the floor, Eddy and Double d did the same with two more blocks into their place in the pattern. The blocks sank into the floor with a yellow light, which made the statue of the hero slide away, revealing as hole in the ground to the basement. "What would we do without you, Double d?"_

"_Scam for eternity?" Ed offered as the three entered the stairwell, but Double d stayed behind just a moment. _Why do I see all these triangles these days? And why is there a picture of a weirdly dressed pirate crew on the wall? Why does the hero of time look so familiar, along with the picture of the bearded man on the wall?

"_Hey Double d?" Eddy shouted from down stairs, "You coming, or what?"_

"_Nice basement." Ed announced seeing it for the first time. Though it too was in black and white, it had several giant stone guards in a circle around a platform, and several stain-glass windows along the side, depicting men, women, children, Zoras and Gorons alike. "What a discovery!" Double d wandered into the center of the room, "If only they were in color, the story they would tell!" he took black and white pictographs of the windows until he ran out of film. "Hey Double d, me and Ed have been thinking." _

"_Yes Eddy?"_

"_Since I have a bow and quiver, and since he has a hero's sword, we think you should have this 'power to vanquish evil', Just to make it fair."_

"_Well, if that's how you really feel. Where do you suppose it-"_

_He backed into something hard and metallic, and when he turned around, a sword was standing in a square stone."_

"_There, I think." Ed mumbled, before the king of red lions cleared it up further, "this blade is none other than the master sword, the blade of evil's bane." The Eds stared at the legendary sword before them, "It's the only sword that can banish Gannon from the world above." The pirate charm ceased its usefulness as Double d Stepped closer to the pedestal. "Well, if it will save the girls." Double d took the End of the sword and pulled on it with all his might, tugging it loose with a difficult effort, "Wait a go sockhead!" Eddy called as light streamed from the hole where it once sat. The several stone guardians lowered their swords to form a roof over Double d's head. From where the swords crossed a light shone into the room, causing all the color around them to return. "Yay, the rooms are painted!" Ed shouted, rolling on the floor. "Well, that was interesting." Double d whispered, looking around the room and seeing the now colored stain-glass windows and such in color. Double d then looked at his sword; from the large tip to the blue handle it showed excellent craftsmanship. He swung it to the side, stabbed the air before him and chopped the ground. "Yes, this shall do just fine. I couldn't think of a better weapon to fight Gannon with." He announced, raising the sword to the air. Thusly-Double d became the sole owner of the master sword._

"_Wish I could say they died with dignity!" Eddy said, pulling an arrow out of the butt of a moblin who had a seagull scrawled across its face by Ed. They'd spent all night killing monsters in this castle and were still standing on pure excitement "What do we do now, what's next?" _

"_Well Eddy, now I believe it's time to save Sarah."_

"_Goin' to save my sister, Goin' to save my sister!" Ed chanted as the three stepped outside. Double d sighed happily, as they started to sail away. "What's with you?" Eddy asked as they almost entered the light. "Well, it's just this place reminds me of an age gone by, a happier time when the people were connected. We need places like this on our world."_

"_We also need Seagulls that make tasty Eggs as pets that make funny noises!" Ed laughed, flapping his elbows like a chicken "Buck-buck-BAGAW!"_

"_We need YOU two to stop acting crazy! It's time to give Gannon what-for!"_

"_Right, onward to The Forsaken Fortress!" _

_By the time the Eds made it to the fortress, it was nightfall yet again, but they slept most of the way. This time the Eds snuck no more! Ed open-fired on the door with the cannon with Devil-may-cry courage. "Lucy, I'm home!" Eddy shouted tauntingly to Gannon as the Eds climbed back onto his territory. "Gannon has likely been made aware of our little incursion already."_

"_Probably, but like it matters anymore." Double d said, shining the Master sword one more time after drawing it. "That sword shall shine in the darkness, casting back evil. With it in your hands, none can stop you from rescuing your family members."_

"_CARPE DIEM!" Ed shouted, pulling out the hero's sword, with a goofy smile._

"_Shouldn't we be avoiding the searchlights?"_

"_Ta heck with the searchlights! Eddy shouted, running across the square, "I'm gonna fry that bird if it's the last thing I-"_

"_Muh-huh-huh-huh-huh" an evil laugh stopped the Eds before a door that led to the upper levels of the fortress. Behind them a man made of shadow materialized, holding a giant sword. "GANNON!" the three Eds shouted at once. He laughed again evilly before building a ball of light. "Double d, do something!" Eddy begged behind his friend._

"_Use the force, Padawan!" Ed shouted, swinging his own sword randomly. Double d took out the Master sword and hit the electric ball, sending it flying back to shadow-Gannon. He hit it back to Double d, and such a volley continued until Gannon missed and it hit him, when Double d rushed in and hit the foul spirit with the sword. Afterwards he disappeared, and four more materialized around the Eds, when they dodged them one became real and Double d hit him again. This cycle continued until the Ghost of Evil disappeared, but not without a final laugh of malice._

"_Way to go, Double d!" Ed rushed to his friend when the fight was over, giving him a hug, thankfully after his sword was put back in its sheath. Than Ed noticed a chest near the center of the platform and opened it, "Look Eddy, a limited-time-only-zombie-killer-crusher-mallet! Like in the movie _limited time only Zombie killer crusher mallet!_" Ed said, hitting the ground with it with tremendous force. "Ed, stop pulverizing the-" Eddy shouted as Ed pulled up the mallet, revealing a crushed miniblin. Many now were surrounding them. While Double d sliced them and Eddy shot them with his bow and arrows, Ed cleared the path ahead with his skull-shaped mallet. In no time at all they were back in the room with Sarah and Ayrll._

"_Here it is, the moment of truth." Double d Said, trying to open the big door. "SARAH!" Ed slammed the door open, sending Double d flying into the room. He looked around and listened, waiting for the Helmroc to come before assuming it was gone and moving towards the Cage. "Umm, Sarah, Aryll?" He called as Ed and Eddy came forward as well. "Sarah!" Ed shouted happily as his sister stood up within the wooden box, "Ed? You came back?"_

"_Of course he did, Sarah. Ed cares about you more than you could ever know." Double d said, trying to open the door. While staring into the cage, he saw the same Thirty-year old woman as before, sitting by the bars of the cage, but looking at them with curiosity. Sadly, Double d could not open the door this way. "The cell won't open that Easily!" a cheerful voice called behind the Eds. Behind them stood Tetra and her pirates, looking proud and strong as ever._

"_There you go, acting before you think, as usual." She waved a hand forward and both Gonzo and Senza smashed open the door easily. "Geez, who asked you to come?" Eddy griped as the men pulled out young girls from the cage. "I swear! Do you even realize we had to draw that monster bird off you? It was about to come flying in here after you again."_

"_Umm . . .Thank-you-Tet-ra?" Double d managed, wondering why she would do something so dangerous for them. _

"_Yeah, yeah, I can walk!" Sarah shouted behind them, making the Eds turn. What Tetra saw on the Back of Double d almost stopped her heart in her chest. She recognized that sword as the Master sword, the blade of Evil's bane. "Oh you two always are arguing!" Double d turned around to the confused girl's gaze, "What?"_

"_That sword! Where'd you get that?!" _

"_Oh this?" Double d asked, pulling out the Master sword, "It's kind of a long story."_

"_Are you . . . is it even possible?" She shrugged her shoulders with a smirk, "How could it be . . ."_

_Meanwhile, when Sarah made her way out, "Sarah!" Ed shouted, hugging his sister tightly, "Uh yeah, thanks Ed. I better be getting home now." Eddy was shell shocked, "What? No reward, no accolades? Just a thank you and leave?"_

"_Pipe down frog face!" Sarah shouted back at him._

"_After all we've done this is how WE'RE treated?"_

"_Oh you two always are arguing!" Double d sighed, turning around. _

"_Whatever, I don't need this!" Eddy stormed over to the other side of the cage._

"_Anyways, thanks Ed. That was crazy and stupid of you, but I'm glad you did it!" Sarah smiled as she followed Senza to the pirate ship._

"_I'd move heaven and Hell to save you, baby sister!" Ed called after her._

"_Hm, but never mind about that. For now we'll just take these girls back to their fathers."_

"_Wait!" Double d put his sword back and cleared his throat, "There's someone I need to meet first." Double d entered the Cage and knelt down before the thirty-year old. "Are you by chance Aryll?" he said softly to her. Her eyes filled with life, and a smile she had been hiding for years emerged again from deep inside her. "Yes, my name is Aryll. Who are you?"_

"_My name is Eddward Marian Link, but my friends all call me Double D. And I do believe you are my long-lost aunt." The woman's smile grew, and she threw her arms around her nephew. "Oh Double D! My brother promised when he finally made it here fifteen years ago that he'd free me somehow, but how could I imagine it would be his son who would do this?"_

"_I know. It's wonderful."_

"_I'm so sorry to interrupt such a heartwarming reunion," Tetra entered the cage indifferently and pointed to the hole in the roof out into the sky, "but isn't there something that you need to take care of?"_

"_Oh right. Aunt Aryll, we really must catch up again sometime, but now I have a giant bird to kill."_

"_A GIANT BIRD TO KILL?" Aryll' s eyes widened, "Isn't that a little too dangerous or a boy your age?"_

"_Maybe, but there are three boys my age here!" Double d said next to Eddy and Ed._

"_Besides, if you're worried about getting home, don't be! I promise I'll deliver you and Sarah back safely to your little island. Normally I'd expect a huge reward for something like this, but this time it's my treat!" She smiled at the Eds warmly, a real first. _

"_Once again, thank you Tetra."_

"_You're really thankful about the little things, aren't you Double d?"_

"_Mrs. Tetra we need to hurry! That bird will be here any second!" Gonzo advised as he entered the room._

"_Gonzo! Excellent, you're just in time! Take this one for me." She pointed at Aryll._

"_Huh?! But she's . . ."_

"_She's fine, just do as you're told!" She ordered. Gonzo lifted the woman and carried her to the boat, "Double d!" she shouted one more time as Double d waved feebly. _It's for the best._ He thought as he saw Gonzo and his Aunt disappear beyond the Door. Tetra followed, but stopped at the door. She winked at Double d and said, "Eds, we'll be back, I swear it!"_

"_Bye Dazel!" Eddy called as the door just barely shut._

"_Well someone's mister popular!" Eddy laughed as the door shut behind them. "Eddy, the bird is coming. We'll discuss this later." As the three ran for the ramp to the upper levels Eddy kept talking, "Aww admit it. That sword's a babe magnet for you!"_

"_I have no idea what you're talking about Eddy-"_

"_Guys, the floor is leaking." Ed pointed to a grate in the floor that spewed water onto the floor, covering it quickly. Just then the Helmroc king flew in, hovering over the Eds with a hungry glaze over its eyes._

"_RUN AWAY!" the Eds climbed the ramp, ignoring both jars of money and monsters to get to a place where they'd have an advantage over the Bird. Finally they reached the top, and the Evil bird blocked their path. "No longer shall I run!" Ed shouted, taking out his skull hammer and smashing the bird's helmet. It screeched and fell into the water below while the Eds scurried out of the hole. "Why Ed, that was genius!" Double d smiled at his tall friend. "Oh come on Double d, everyone know that the bird is the word!"_

"_Whatever, let's go smash Gannon's face in for putting us through this!" but when they looked around themselves they found the walls and exits were blocked by spikes and that the floor was closing. "Well this stinks!" Eddy shouted, walking towards the northern spikes, "Ed, try and bust these open with your hammer!"_

"_You got it Eddy," Ed hammered away at the bars while Eddy and Double d watched. But before Ed did much Damage, the ground all around them began to shake, and the Eds nearly fell into what was left of the hole. The Helmroc king spiraled out of the hole and with a loud caw began to flap angrily over the Eds, feathers flying everywhere._

"_Now what?" Eddy asked as the bird landed next to them. "SCATTER!" Double d shouted as he and Eddy dove away from the bird, but Ed stood there, "Hi birdie!" he smiled and stepped back a ways before the Helmroc king could peck him down into the stone. Ed took out his hammer and hit him on the helmet again, "DIE!" The bird cawed loudly and started flying again. Often the bird would after that blew a gust of wind at the Eds, knocking them into the spikes painfully. Other times it would dive-bomb them and cut through them with its talons. But whenever it landed and got its beak caught in the stone Ed would hit it with the hammer until its stone mask broke away, revealing the bird's purple face, orange crown feathers, and Red eyes. After that Double d would take Eds place, slashing the Bird's face every time the bird's beak got stuck. Meanwhile, Eddy circled around the parapet, shooting the Bokoblins running the watchtowers, causing the lights to stand still over the platform. "TAKE THIS!" Double d shouting, smacking the bird's face one more time before it cawed, thrashing wildly, and tried to fly into the air. It couldn't fly very high and got stuck in the light of the watchtowers Eddy modified. It cawed painfully and exploded in the lights, a new heart container was all that was left (Except for the feathers now scattering in the wind.)_

"_Well I suppose that's that." Double d announced, turning to the wrecked ship that housed the king of evil, the path now opened by the fallen spikes._

"_Now to face the big guy himself!"_

"_And it works for him!"_

_SMASH! Ed's hammer crashed through the door, getting stuck on it, while the other part of the door fell over, revealing that Eddy had shot it with several arrows. "Can't you just open the door like normal human beings?" Double d asked, striding in with his sword unsheathed. "What? And ask Gannon for tea and biscuits?" Eddy laughed at this before the three stood deadly still. Standing there before them was the same man robed in darkness they saw before meeting the king of red lions, with his back turned to them. "It's been a while, boy." He said in a deep, scratchy voice, again the Eds got annoyed._

"_THERE ARE THREE OF US, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!" Double d shouted, holding up his sword._

"_Of course there are three of you, I was speaking to the one that really mattered. You 'three' have done well to sneak into my fortress and wriggle your way all the way up here."_

"_Yeah, and now we'll do even better by kicking your butt!" Eddy gloated, pulling out an arrow._

"_I suppose the least I can do is commend you for your reckless courage."_

"_Say your toasts Gannon!" Ed shouted, raising his hammer._

"_My name is Gannondorf." He announced proudly, turning around to face them. He had a red beard that encircled his head and an orange jewel on top of it. His eyes glowed with a red malice, "And I am the Master of the forsaken fortress!" Double d winced with the hatred in his eyes, but held up his sword, ready to strike. "By the way boy," he said, addressing Double d, "When you drew that sword of yours out of its pedestal, did you by chance notice how all the monsters frozen in time down there suddenly began stirring again?"_

"_Well, yes, but I don't see why-"_

"_Do you understand precisely what that means? I highly doubt you do."_

"_Don't talk bad about Double d you jerk!" Eddy shouted, firing the arrow at his feet, "Double d's easily the smartest kid on the sea so-"_

"_HA! THE SMARTEST, YOU SAY? If he was really the smartest he be doing this alone, without you two idiots to slow him down!" he smiled again, "Foolish child, while that sword is indeed the blade of evil's bane, at the same time it has long played another role."_

"_Royal centerpiece?" Ed offered while Gannon continued,_

"_You see, it is also a sort of key . . . a most wretched little key that has kept the seal on me and my magic intact!"_

"_Oops." Eddy squeaked out, as Gannon's grin got bigger, "By withdrawing that blade, you have broken that seal."_

"_What have I done?" Double d whispered, staring at his sword. But then he remembered all the trouble he went through to get it, and he charged at Gannon screaming. There was a loud clang, and the other Eds covered their eyes. _

_Ed and Eddy peeked out from behind their fingers a few moments later. Double d was kneeling on the Ground, the Master sword stuck in the ground near Gannon's feet. Gannon was smiling triumphantly. "W-why?" Double d asked, looking up at Gannon. Gannon drew back one hand and smacked him across the floor. "DOUBLE D!" the other two Eds shouted, readying their Weapons, while Gannon pulled out his own large sword, "You cannot defeat me with a blade that does not sparkle with the power to repel evil. What you hold is useless." Double d gulped and closed his eyes, waiting for his fate, "You two, the worthless ones, Go back to the world below, and tell that to the pathetic fools who made this blade." The other two Eds backed away, knowing they were in too deep, "its power is gone, and its Edges are dull." Gannon raised his sword, ready to slice Double d in half, when a slight thump behind him made everyone look, even Double d._

_Kneeling by an open window, Tetra smirked at the king of evil. "TETRA RUN!" Double d advised before she dashed at the fiend, landing one kick before being brushed off easily by Gannon. She landed next to Double d and shouted frantically, "Double d, get up!" Before Gannon caught her by the neck. "TETRA!" the three Eds shouted, Eddy even forgot his 'Dazel' joke. "Stop! Let . . . Let me go!" She choked out while Gannon smirked with sadistic glee, "You pathetic little sea rat!" as he reached out with his other hand to silence her forever, he noticed a piece of Gold, almost in the shape of a triangle, hanging from her neck. He also noticed that something on his hand, shaped like the same triangle-shape as in the castle, began to glow. This stopped him for a moment, "My triforce of power is resonating!"_

"_YOUR WHAT?" Double d asked, stumbling onto his feet before falling over again. "Ha! At long last I have found you . . . Princess Zelda!"_

"_PRINCESS?" at any other time Eddy would laugh at this, but he was too scared to utter more than this. "Wh-what?! What are you talking about? I don't know any Zelda . . ." Tetra thrashed some more, trying to get out of the Dark lord's grip. "Feigning ignorance will gain you nothing! Tell me, if you are not Zelda, then why do you have this fragment of the triforce." _

"_Pardon me, but I have no idea what's going on here." Double d tried to use his sword to stand but couldn't, "Silence boy!" Gannon shouted, shaking the room. But after his shout stopped, the room still shook. "It is an Earthquake!" Ed shouted, running for the doorframe, before he disappeared. "Ed?" Double d asked Before Tetra disappeared too. "Wait a sec, what's goin-" Eddy started before disappearing too, leaving Double d and Gannon. "Umm, yes! Fancy weather we're having." Double d started before being swept away by Prince Komali. Quill held Tetra and two other Ritos had the Eds. The four flew away from the cursed fortress Before Valoo Set fire to the Dark lord's Quarters, leaving only the stone intact._


	13. Cassarole dinner is a meme now

"_That was so cool!" Ed shouted as the four landed on the king of red lions in the ring of arcs near the tower of the gods. "I wonder if Tetra will be ok." Double d mumbled, staring at her unconscious on their small boat. Eddy grinned wildly, "Aha! I knew it!"_

"_You knew what? Do you know something about what that madman said?"_

"_No, but I know you've got the hots for Tetra!" Ed and Eddy laughed uproariously, "Double d and Tetra, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-"_

"_Is it so wrong to worry about someone?" Double d asked, shaking off the angry blush that had developed on his face. _

"_It's all right, Double d. she has merely lost consciousness" Quill assured him while hovering in mid-air. Ed, now finished with his song, started to count his teeth while prince Komali spoke to him, "Your sister has escaped from the forsaken fortress Ed, you can relax now!"_

"_Buttered toast." Ed mumbled. "Lord Valoo!" The king of red lions called to the flying dragon, "You arrived to a moment too soon! We are deeply grateful."_

* * *

"_I am aware of this. Yet I thought our first priority should be to separate the two from Gannon's grasp."_

" " _with that the Dragon and his Rito assistants flew back to Dragon Roost Island._

"_Eds, I will explain things later! Now we must return to the world beneath the sea!" the king of red lions instructed as the Eds sailed into the ring of light. But Eddy and Ed joked all the way down. "So where do you think they'll get married, Ed?"_

"_Am I invited?"_

"_Wonder how many kids they'll have."_

"_Can I be their godfather?"_

"_Every Sunday, uncle Eddy'll haft to visit."_

"_Don't forget Uncle Ed!"_

"_And we'll all talk and laugh around a hand-made"_

"_Gentlemen, might a ask for just a touch of-"_

"_Gravy-based"_

"_Just an ounce of-"_

"_**CASSAROLE-DINNER!"**_

"_MY KINGDOM FOE SOME PERFESSIONALISM, HERE!" Double d Barked as they landed in the castle's pool. Tetra's eyes fluttered open and she sat up a bit, which relieved Double d, "Thank goodness. I was certain that Gannondorf had fully asphyxiated you back in his study." Eddy snickered a little until Tetra started talking again, "Ohh . . . oww . . . Double d, are you alright."_

"_Hey, what about us?" Eddy asked angrily._

"_Did I see you about to get sliced to ribbons? No, I did not."_

"_I'm alright Tetra. Thank goodness for Rito's though."_

"_What is this place?"_

"_Judging by the look of it and how it's underwater, I'm willing to guess a Disney castle."_

"_Blatantly humorless Eddy. But it is a fully-sized castle underwater, that much we are certain of."_

"_Hey, and Gannondorf! What happened to him?"_

"_He was barbecued mesquite style by Valoo!"_

"_Why Ed! You seem to be improving your vocabulary!"_

"_Gravy!" Double d shot a foot into the air, not expecting the pirate charm to go off, "Eds, what are you doing? You must come to the room where you got the master sword!"_

"_Alright, alright, get off our backs!" Tetra stared at the stone for a moment, "Who's using that stone . . . Just who are you? The Eds and I are the only ones who can speak through this stone! How dare you use what's not yours?!"_

_The voice in the stone continued after this, "Your name is Tetra, correct? You must come with The Eds to see me at once."_

"_Come and see you?" Eddy and Ed ran to the head of the ship and poked the Lion's face, "But you're right here!"_

"_Come on Mr. Lion, I know your head's made of wood, but you could talk with it before!" Double d cleared his throat, "Actually Ed, I do believe that the king of Red lions is indeed a soulless automaton, controlled by some sort of technological genius." Tetra smirked at the stone as it fell back into Double d's hand, "Well, don't you sound important! Fine, we're on our way. Just hold your horses, whoever you are." Tetra jumped from the boat into the pool of water beneath water, "Come on guys, you heard the stone." Double d thought about the strange painting and hurried out of the boat, "Before we find the Voice I need to show you something bound to be interesting." Eddy started laughing again, "What's up Double d? Gonna show Dazel your butterfly collection?" Tetra tuned around, a sneer painting her face, "What. Was. That?"_

"_What? The butterflies or your stupid middle name?" Eddy smirked, not noticing the swift movement behind him, "Bye Eddy." Tetra smirked as she and Double d ran into the castle. "Whatever." Eddy rolled his eyes as he started to follow them, but something caught his shirt, when he turned around he found Tetra's sword sticking through his shirt and into their boat. "Ed, help me out of this, will ya?" Eddy struggled a little until Ed Got a brilliant idea. He grabbed his hammer and smacked the sword, knocking Eddy into the water. "Thanks Ed. Let's go check on the lovebirds!"_

"_I promise not to peek, Eddy!"_

"_Oh wow, Skipper?" Tetra laughed as they entered the castle. "Everyone teases him about it, almost as much as his height." Underneath Tetra's no-nonsense exterior Double d found something he thought he's never find: someone who lets him finish his sentences. "This is what I wanted to show you," Double d Pointed to the painting on the wall, "Recognize anyone?"_

"_Either my entire crew decided to cosplay as _the village people_ or I need glasses."_

"_Our thoughts exactly. But the question is, who's the girl in the center?"_

"_Dunno, but she looks like a little princess, what with all the makeup and the dress."_

"_It must be a big contrast to the life of a pirate."_

"_Yeah, I don't have the time or the motivation to wear that stuff. If someone doesn't like how I look, that's their problem."_

"_Wow, you're very self-confident."_

"_It comes with being a pirate captain. So anyway, where's that voice?"_

"_Oh, right! Umm, follow me, if you please." Just than a pair of familiar fools tripped into the once-royal hall, "Way to ruin my shirt, Tetra!"_

"_You were asking for it. Anyway, let's go find that clown who's using my charm."_

"_You mean besides Hollywood?"_

"_Shut up, Ed."_

"_Nice basement." Tetra stated, looking at the stain-glass windows and the stone guardians. As She and the Eds stepped higher up onto the platform, a man dressed in bright red had his back to them while standing over the Master sword's pedestal. "Are you the one who's been speaking through my stone without my permission? Answer me?"_

"_Is that you, Santa?" Ed asked stupidly. The man spoke in an old, noble voice, "That stone is an enhanced version of the Gossip stones long spoken of in the legends of the Hyrulean Royal Family. I am the one who made it."_

"_I knew it, he's a genius." Double d smiled while the others looked at the old man with confusion, "Who made it? The royal family's gossip stone?" Tetra looked at him with disbelief, "I'm sorry, but I have no idea what you're talking about."_

"_Can I have a pretty stone too, Santa?"_

"_Have none of you heard the tales? Tales of the kingdom spoken of in the legend of the great hero . . . the place where the power of the gods lies hidden?"_

"_I've heard some, but not enough to know the significance of the stone . . . or anything that's going on really. Might you elaborate?" _

"_This place, where the four of you now stand, is that kingdom. This is Hyrule"_

"_Cool." All three Eds agreed. The man turned around, showing that he had a white beard, and a crown. In fact, he was the same man as in the painting above. "SANTA!" Ed shouted, giving a man a giant hug all the while asking for things. "Actually Ed, I am the current king of Hyrule: Daphnes Nohanson Hyrule."_

"_Should we be groveling or something?" Eddy asked with a smirk. "Actually Eddy, what I'd prefer right now is for you to listen to what I have to say. No Doubt you recognize my voice."_

"_How could I forget, Leo?" Eddy offered while he and Double d smiled, but Ed was still certain it was Santa he was speaking to. "Once, long ago, this land of Hyrule was turned into a world of shadows by Gannon, who sought to obtain the power of the gods for his own evil ends."_

"_So he hasn't changed a bit?"_

"_My power alone could not stop the fiend, and our only choice was to leave the fate of the kingdom in the hands of the gods. When the gods heard our pleas, they chose to seal away not only Gannon, but Hyrule itself. So, with a torrential downpour of rains from the heavens, our fair kingdom was soon buried beneath the waves, forgotten at the bottom of the ocean."_

"_So this is what became of the kingdom, what a discovery!"_

"_But if that's true, than what about those of us who are still alive?"_

"_All was not lost, for the gods knew that to seal away the people along with the kingdom would be to grant Gannon's wish for the destruction of the land. So before the sealing of the kingdom, the gods chose those who would build a new country and commanded them to take refuge on the mountaintops. Those people were your ancestors."_

"_Our aunts and sisters got flooded and didn't tell us?"_

"_Ancestors, Ed. Relatives from older generations of our family tree?" the king continued, now having the undivided attention of all four of them_

"_Hundreds of years have passed since then . . . so long as Gannondorf was not revived, Hyrule would remain below, never waking from its slumber."_

"_So let me get this straight," Eddy responded after hearing all this, "After hiding this castle forever you decide to show three island yokels and a pirate? Why us?"_

"_Because there's more to you than meets the eye. Tetra, come to me."_

_She hesitated, but slowly stepped towards the old king. He held out his hand, and the golden charm on her necklace flew from its place to his hand without its chain, glowing brightly. "HE'S A WITCH!" Ed shouted happily as the voice of their boat continued, "This necklace you wear is a part of a sacred treasure called the Triforce of Wisdom, which has been passed down for many ages within the royal family of Hyrule." _

"_Royal family?" the four gaped uncomprehendingly._

"_Your mother passed this down to you and instructed you to treasure it . . . and guard it with your life. Am I not correct?"_

"_Y-yeah . . . right before she died . . ."_

"_The Triforce of wisdom is none other than the sacred power of the gods that we've kept from Gannon's clutches for so many long years. The gods placed upon your ancestors the task of protecting it from evil's grasp."_

"_By giving it to a pirate?" Eddy asked, confused now more than ever._

"_Like I've said, there's more than meets the eye. The time has come for me to teach you the fate which into you were born, the very reason that you live."_

"_Wait a sec, only I decide what -" Tetra stopped when Hyrule produced another golden triangle, one just big enough to fit into a notch of the Triforce. The two pieces were drawn together like magnets, "You see Eddy, Tetra is not merely a pirate," a light shone from the completed triforce, a sort of electricity that enveloped Tetra and blinded the Eds. When they looked back, Tetra was gone, and a girl, not unlike that in the painting stood there, "She is a princess."_

"_My . . . fate . . ." The princess stuttered, gazing at the Triforce mark on her right hand. _

"_My word." Double d muttered silently._

"_You are the true heir of the royal family of Hyrule," The mystical Royal told her, "the last link in the bloodline. You are princess Zelda." Eddy snickered, than started rolling on the floor with laughter, "Oh man, this is better than Dazel!" he choked out between booming laughter. "Eddy please, show some dignity!" Double d requested while the others ignored him._

"_Zelda . . . I'm a princess?"_

"_You are confused, aren't you? I suppose such is to be expected." She turned back to the Eds, her blue eyes locking onto Double d and Ed while the king continued, "Eds, I am terribly sorry that you have been caught up in these events. But now that it is known that Tetra is indeed Princess Zelda, Gannon will be searching frantically for this child in an attempt to get the power of the gods that she possesses. He will not rest until he has found her. If he succeeds, my ancient kingdom under the sea will be turned into a land of shadow and despair . . . and so will the world you know above the waves."_

"_What do we do?!" Ed asked with a note of panic._

"_I need you three to lend me your strength in this dark hour."_

"_Whatever strength I have left to give." Double d promised,_

"_Ed the monster hunter does not run away!" Ed shouted, taking out his sword,_

"_Well, if I'm gonna kick a guy's butt, might as well go all the way." Eddy reasoned, out of breath from laughing. _

"_I have a suspicion about what caused the master sword to lose its power. We must return to the world above the water and return the power to repel evil to the master sword."_

_Eddy had an evil grin on, and Ed had a bold determination about him, "And then we'll defeat Gannondorf."_

"_Yeah! We'll show this 'Gannon-dork' that we ain't worthless! You with us Double d!"_

"_Indeed I am Eddy. We'll show that contemptuous swine what for!" Zelda stared at the three, wondering what, or if, she could do to help them when the good king spoke yet again, "Zelda . . . it is far too dangerous for you to join us in this task."_

"_Maybe in a bunch of years." Ed offered, with Eddy rudely adding, "Yeah, like a century." Before Double d glared them quiet. "Fortunately, this sacred chamber is not yet known to Gannon. It is my wish that you wait in hiding until our return." And with that he disappeared._

"_Mr. Witch disappeared Double d!" Ed ran to where the king once stood. "Technically he would be a warlock Ed. And I'm sure he's somewhere near-by."_

"_Eds, I'm right behind you." The voice of their boat stood on the last staircase between the master sword's place and the upper castle, "We must go!" he de-materialized and rematerialized up the levels on the stairs and presumably out the door. "What the-? Hey, wait up Mufasa!" Eddy called, running up the stars after him. Ed and Double d followed him but Tet- Ahem, Zelda, stopped them. "Ed, Double d, Eddy . . . I don't know how to say this . . . Everything that's happened to you and your families . . . it's all been my fault. I'm so sorry."_

"_All is forgiven, princess pirate captain friend! It is Gannondorf that causes evil!" Ed turned around and unsheathed his sword heroically._

"_I believe Ed means 'this is more Gannondorf's fault than yours." Double d responded, "A sentiment I thoroughly and whole heartedly share."_

"_HEY ROMEO AND JULIET!" Eddy called from the doorway, "WE'VE GOT A JOB TO DO HERE! You too, Ed!"_

"_Coming Eddy!" The two called, running up the stairs after their friend._

"_Eds, be careful." The young princess begged as she examined the new triforce mark on her hand._


	14. The day Microsoft Word stood still

"Hello Mr. Lionking!" Ed called when they returned to their boat, completely forgetting who voiced it. "Eds, listen well. The fact that the Mastersword lost the power to repel evil suggests to me that something has happened to the sages who infused the blade with the gods' power."

"Sages?" Eddy asked, sewing his shirt back together from where Tetra's blade had split it, "You never said nothing about no sages!"

"That's "anything about any," Eddy." Double d corrected, "You were saying?"

"The sages should be here in Hyrule, in the Wind temple to the north and the Earth temple to the south, praying to the gods."

"Spices can pray to gods?" Ed asked as the boat continued

"You must head to the two temples to see what has happened to the sages and attempt to find a way to recover the power to repel evil."

"Well that shouldn't be too hard: find the sages, ask for their help, maybe even get some lemonade out of the de-"

"It would be easy, except it seems Gannon has blocked our path from down here in Hyrule to the temples."

"Then all is lost . . . unless . . ."

"You catch on quickly; Double d. there is another entrance to each temple on the mountain tops, which are now islands above the sea. I shall mark these places with your sea chart."

"In that case we should leave, before Gannon discovers our whereabouts." Double d finished as the three stepped into the hull of their boat and back into the over world.

While they sailed to the northern Wind temple, the king of red lions asked Double d what he knew about the legend of the hero. "I actually know a bit more about the legend than most people, then names of the people, places, lost races-"

"Do you know about the piece of triforce given to the hero?"

"He was given part of it too?"

"Yes, it was a Tri-force after all. His was the Triforce of courage

He guarded it well, just as well as Zelda did. But when he was called to embark on another adventure and leave Hyrule,"

"You can leave Hyrule?" Double d asked, not meaning to interrupt.

"Yes; there are many lands beyond this one, and it is my hope that one day you see them, when this tale is done. But when that happened he was separated from the Triforce, thus it split into eight pieces and scattered across Hyrule. Even I do not know where they rest, but they are somewhere in this great sea. The Triforce of courage will open the doorway to Hyrule again. You must find it."

"Me?! But I don't know the first thing about courage! My knees start to shake at the mere sight of a miniblin-"

"I've said it before my friend: Courage is not the absence of fear, just as wisdom is not the absence of ignorance and power is not the absence of weakness. They are merely resistances, ways of dealing with their opposites. Each of you holds courage, and wisdom, and power, but together it shines brighter than the Triforce itself."

"Mr. Lionhead is the Wind temple supposed to be gusty."

"Why yes, Ed. It is supposed to be quite gusty."

"I think we are here."

The entrance to the wind temple would probably look completely normal, if not for the giant octorok statue, whose breezes blew the trees and grass sideways. "Man, this thing blows hot air faster then Kevin and Gannon combined." Eddy smiled as the boat came to a stop, "Let's see what the sages haft to say about it." The Eds left the king of red lion's hull and climbed onto the wind temple's sandy shores, but as soon as their feet hit the grassland beyond the wind knocked them off the island and into the water. "Drat! Friends, I do believe the temple is currently in-accessible."

"In-accessa-? But what about the sage guy?"

"We could try the Earth spice-guy."

"I'm afraid that is our only option."

"COME ON ED; PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT!" Eddy called to Ed, who was trying to lift a huge stone head that blocked the path to the earth temple. Both the wind and earth temples were as far north and as far south as possible, respectively, so the Eds were close to outset at this time. "Geez, what's with this thing?"

"I'm afraid that judging by the size of this rock and its composition we'd need 50,000 joules of force to lift it, or the strength of everyone we've met thus far on our journey."

"We could throw a bigger rock at it!"

"Ed that would take even more force. For now I think we should try to find a way to obtain the strength to pass these thresholds."

"Sounds good. But first," Eddy dragged his friends back into their boat and charted a course north, "I've got a frog to pound."

Cyclos' cyclone spun wildly across the sea as the Eds prepared to do battle with him. "Remember Ed, sail beside the cyclone, not into it like last time."

"Gotcha Double d!" Ed replied, rigging the sails. Eddy pulled out several arrows from his quiver and loaded one into his bow, "This oughta fix 'em!"

"Are we ready?" Double d asked his two serious-faced friends, "Right then, let's proceed." The sails opened, and their boat sailed into the outer pull of the cyclone. Cyclos rose up from the depths chuckling, so high that the Eds could just barely see his face. Eddy took aim with his bow and fired many times, only occasionally missing. Finally Cyclos gave in, and he stopped his cyclone. He floated down to the water, showing that he was bigger than the stone head at the entrance of the Earth temple. "That's a heck of an arm you've got there!" he commended to Eddy.

"Oh, uh, thanks . . ." Eddy commented, turning from angry to confused as Cyclos changed to about the size of the king of red lions. "And what an eye! No one's ever been able to spot me in there before!"

"We could all see you!" Ed commented as Double d stepped forward.

"Mr. Cyclos, we are in quite a predicament. We need to gain entrance to the earth and wind temples, but both are blocked beyond reaching. Is there any way to reach them?"

"Indeed there is, young wind waker, but first you must obtain the power to cool the hottest fires and melt the coldest ice."

"Sounds neat!" Eddy smiled, "Where do we find it?"

"The power lies in side an island called mother and child's isle, but to get there you will need this power. Pay attention." Cyclos rose into the air on his cloud, and flew in four directions at once: Down, right, left and up. "Directions!" Ed shouted happily as Double d pulled out the wind waker, "now let's see . . ." He mumbled as he repeated the tune with the magical baton. "That tune's called the ballad of gales," Cyclos added when Doubled d finished it, "with it you can use my cyclones to go anywhere! See you down the road!" Cyclos blew away in a gust of wind, much like his brother, and the Eds never saw either of them ever again.

"Well let's see," Double d pulled out the sea-chart and checked it for mother and child isle, "it appears we can warp to several locations on the great sea, but very few are marked on our map."

"We should start looking for those fish-guys. Anyways, let's try that place first!" Eddy said, pointing to an island in the far corner of the map. Double d played the tune and chose the island when the map came up, and when he did a powerful cyclone lifted their boat into the sky, spinning them recklessly as it did so.

"Dizzy, I'm dizzy!" Double d stumbled around on the boat as they landed. "I think I'm gonna throw up!" Eddy moaned as he shook it off. The three stared at a pile of rocks in the center of a spring, where their boat floated currently. A small fairy flew amongst several purple sparks that turned into many. "Man this world is cool." Eddy whispered as the sparks concentrated into a thin stream, then burst; revealing a strange spirit. It looked like a young girl, about the same age as the Eds, but she was a pale blue, all except for her dress, hair, and pupil-less eyes, which were a light green. In her hands was a doll, one that looked like a great fairy. She chuckled lightly at them, then asked Eddy, "Tell me, little boy . . . can you control the wind?"

"Uhh, yeah, sorta . . . not as good as he can." He pointed his thumb at Double d, than asked him, "Double d, what is she?"

"I believe that is the Queen of the fairies, there are numerous stories about her powerful magic." The queen chuckled and began speaking again, "So young, to have such power. How did you know to find me here?"

"The giant frog-man we beat up told us!" Ed answered, smiling stupidly.

"Well, as your smart friend told you, I am the queen of the fairy world."

"And you think we're young!" Eddy said.

"What is the matter, my child? Does that not surprise you? Young ones . . ."

"I guess we expected you to be a bit . . . older." Double d added, while the fairy continued. "I like you. And so, I shall give new power to that bow you wield."

"Hey, just what we're looking for!" Eddy pulled out his bow and held it up, "So, how's this gonna work?" he asked, as the fairy queen held up her great-fairy doll, without touching it. Using her magic, she separated it into two fairies, one trailed by red sparks and the other by blue. "So, do they just pass through the-OW!" Eddy shouted as the blue one flew into his shoulder. "That was my udder, you stupi-OW!" he was interrupted by the red one doing the same to his other shoulder. "Eddy, your arrows are hot and cold!" Ed announced, juggling the burning and freezing arrows. "Ed, don't touch my stuff!" Eddy barked, placing the special arrows next to the normal ones.

The fairy queen floated down towards the boat, "Ice arrows can freeze the hottest flames, and fire arrows can melt the coldest ice."

"Now the only problem is connecting that back to our predicament at the temples." Double d wondered.

"The fairies in this fountain will ease your wariness. Use them as you need to."

"Will do!" Ed smiled real wide, as the fairy addressed Eddy, "Child, I must tell you, you are just my type!" she giggled, and everyone, even the king of red lions, noticed Eddy's blushing. "Yeah, sure ok." He mumbled as the fairy queen disappeared, "Can we get out of here now?" Double d warped them, which was still unpleasant, to dragon roost. The tune they heard coming from the island was different, but they ignored it so their minds could process the next step.

"Gentlemen, we have come far in locating the secrets of these temples." Double d commended as they landed in the great sea. "Yeah, but I don't think an arrow'll do much against those winds, or that giant head." Eddy admitted, "So now what."

"I can assume that the secret to getting past the obstacles we've seen lies in finding a treasure, most likely encased in fire and ice. The question now is finding these places." Double d thought about it a moment, before Ed pointed south, "What about that island that's on fire?" sure enough, steam was pouring off the face of this volcanic rock. "Brilliant Ed! Now, a coarse south, please."

"I will wake him up!" Ed shouted, opening the sails.

"Man, I'm sweltering over here!" Eddy complained, taking out an ice arrow. "I'm afraid if we got any closer, we'd combust!" Double d fanned himself with his hand. "Yeah, and we'd burn up, too!" the ice arrow sunk into a pillar of fire, which froze as promised. The island cooled drastically, but was still warm to the touch. "I'm afraid this cool spell can't last long; I suggest we raid the island and leave quickly." They climbed up the mountain quickly, avoiding the kragoroks as they could. Inside was a lake of lava, much like the inside of dragon roost cavern. The Eds crossed the cooled magma spots on the lava to the other side, each killing some fire keese along the way, and at the end, they also fought two magtails. "It's dragon roost all over again!" Eddy complained, dispatching of one final keese. "Help me guys!" Ed called, tugging at two golden braclets on his arms. "Ed? Where on earth did you get those?"

"They were in that box over there. I can't get 'em off!" He pointed to an open chest under a golden arch. "I don't remember a treasure chest." Eddy mumbled, looking inside the chest for more treasure, while Double d and Ed stepped near another stone head, much like the one at the entrance to the Earth temple. "Ed, I'm certain this is what we're looking for. Try lifting this." Ed's smiled, forgetting about the bands on his arms and raising the rock effortlessly, "I am Captain Ed! Strongest monster hunter in the universe!"

"Indeed you are, Ed. Now we should be able to at least investigate the Earth temple."

"Finally, no more messing around." Eddy sighed as the three stepped into a glowing light that would free them from the island's interior.

"All right Ed, remember to lift with your knees, not your back."

"But I thought I lifted stuff with my hands."

"Figure of speech, idiot. Just lift that rock." They made it back to the Earth temple quickly (Thanks to their ability to warp.), and now they could finally gain entrance. "Hup-hup!" Ed, shouted, lifting the rock and tossing it aside easily. The three stepped inside the temple, which was nothing more than two lit torches and a stone wall with markings on it. "Aren't temples a little more . . . I dunno . . . fancier?"

"Maybe they're closed for renovations?" Ed and Eddy wondered as Double d read the markings on the stone wall, "Earth god's lyric: Down, down, center, right, left, center. Sounds easy enough." He played the tune well, as the other Eds noticed. "Never thought we'd need the 6/4th thingy." Ed scratched his head when the song ended. When it ended, the mark of the triforce, which stood at the top of the door, began glowing with magic of old. "Perhaps there is more to this temple than this stone wall." Double d squinted at the glowing mark, as a gust of wind behind them alerted them that they were not alone.

"Why do you people keep materializing out of nothing?" Eddy asked, annoyed. Behind them stood a strange blue see-through humanoid, its hair and arms resembled fins and it was dressed in a purple gown and a golden headdress. In her hands she held a matching lyre. "It's our avatar, Double d!" Ed smiled at the ghostly creature. "Actually Ed, this is a Zora, But I thought they were extinct!" the ghost then spoke, "Oh great hero, chosen by the master sword. My name is Laruto."

"You mean like that one song with the cowboy?"

"That's Laredo, you idiot." Eddy roughly corrected as Laruto continued, "I am a Zora sage. For an age, I offered my prayers here in the earth temple, praying that the power to repel evil would ever remain in the master sword."

"You're the sage?" Double d asked, alarmed to see the person he was searching for dead, "How did this happen?"

"Unfortunately, due to Gannondorf's evil designs, the Master-sword you hold has lost its power."

"Stupid Gannon-dork." Eddy grumbled as the sage carried on, "After his defeat at the hands of the hero of time, Gannondorf was sealed away . . . but not for all time. He was revived, and he returned to Hyrule in a red wrath. He attacked this temple and stole my soul, knowing he had to remove the power contained in that enchanted blade."

"That fiend," Double d whimpered at the story, "I shudder to think of what would have happened if the Rito's had not saved us from him."

"In order to return the power to repel evil to your sword, you must find another to take my stead in this temple and ask the gods for their assistance."

"But who will be our avatar, misses Laredo?" Double d sighed, "Laruto, Ed."

"Chili is tasty!" Laruto answered Ed's question dutifully, "you must find the one who carries on my bloodline, the one who holds this sacred instrument. Nothing can stop the flow of time or the passing of generations . . . but the fate carried within my bloodline endures the ravages of all years. It survives. That song you just conducted is one which will open the eyes of the new sage and awaken within that sage the melody that will carry our prayer to the gods. The door that blocks your way can only be opened when the sage plays that song."

"So this wall is actually a door, who knew?" Double d asked rhetorically.

"May the winds of fortune blow with you." Laruto said as she disappeared. Then the Eds realized something important, "Laruto? You never told us who we were looking for!" Eddy called to a phantom that wasn't there.

Without a clear idea of who they were looking for, the Eds searched the great sea for Laruto's heir. Double d's approach of asking all the fishmen across the sea completed their map, but got them no answers. And while they got plenty of rupees, heart containers and item upgrades (Projectile weapons such as bombs and arrows now held 99 of each, and their wallet was greatly expanded.) no promising leads came up. In fact, major setbacks often found them in unlikely places . . .

"WE'RE NEVER GONNA FIND THAT STUPID SAGE!" Eddy shouted in frustration as they entered the auction house, home of the richest man in windfall. "Nonsense Eddy! We just haft to keep looking . . ." Double d turned around to an odd surprise: the poor man from Tingle's jail cell, standing in the finest clothes, looking disdainfully at them. "You there, halt!" he shouted hoarsely at the three heroes.

"My apologies for intruding sir, but would you happen to know where we can find-" Double d was interrupted by the now rich man.

"Oh, you're just some wretched street urchins. I thought you were post men."

"Urchins?!?" Eddy was deeply insulted, "I've got enough rupees to last a lifetime here!"

"Be thankful, because if you were postmen, I would have shooed you out of here before you could say "boo!"

"Boo? who?" Ed asked stupidly as the man continued, "But say . . . you look rather familiar for street urchins. Have we perhaps met before someplace?"

"Surely you must recognize us?" Double d offered, "From the day Ed inadvertently freed Tingle?"

"Yeah, you know . . . "Ed, monster hunter, WE GET IT, YOU'RE POOR!"

"Ah yes, you're the idiots who can't even rescue a little girl from a simple fortress. Those pirates, however could." Eddy burned up in anger, while the other Eds shrugged off this assumption, "Yes, Maggie has been returned safely to me, she's even managed to collect enough treasure to make us fabulously wealthy. If you wish, I'll let you speak to her." The man laughed creepily as the Eds stepped to where Maggie, now in an elegant dress stared sadly out a window.

"Oh, to think that I would survive my ordeal and return to this town," she mumbled, staring out her window, "and to think I would ever be able to live in such a beautiful, opulent house. It's like a dream come true!"

"Umm . . . excuse me, but we need to ask you somethi-"

"But no! NO! It's a nightmare! Without HIM by my side it's like a rainstorm raging inside my heart!"

"Ed, if we ever give out an award for the best interrupter of Double d, she wins." Ed whispered behind his hand.

"He was so kind to me in the Forsaken Fortress. That sweet boy who gave me all those expensive necklaces when I fled from that cursed island."

"That's funny . . . I don't remember any boys residing in the Forsaken fortress either time we were there."

"'Cept for us. And if anyone wants my treasure they'll haft to pry it from my cold, dead hands!"

"Just hearing his name lifts my spirits . . . Moe, the wonderful moblin from the forsaken fortress."

"Moblin?!?!?!?" the three Eds asked, shocked. It's fairly hard to fall in love with your captor, let alone when he's half-pig. "Are you quite certain it's wise to trust a moblin?" Double d almost said out loud, but stopped himself on the word "sure"

"Oh Moe! Why, Moe?" she whined awkwardly, "I'm always writing heartfelt letters with my overflowing emotions, but why don't you answer me, Moe?"

"Gee I dunno, maybe because he's half pig?" Eddy mumbled, but this time Double d said nothing. Suddenly she seemed to notice the Eds

"This is bad, oh terribly bad! I've already drifted off into my own dream world."

"She is not of this world, Guys!" Ed warned his embarrassed friends.

"Now then, we have a small inquir-"

"By the way, I have a request for you three. Could you take this letter I've just finished inking and deliver it to the postbox? Please? I beg of you!" the Eds were hesitant, all but Ed. "a friend in need is a friend we- uh, I forget the rest." Ed laughed, recklessly jamming the letter into his delivery bag. "The postbox, don't you dare forget! But you must promise not to read it, the secret of a girl's heart is only to be shared when she desires."

"Not to mention it is illegal." Double d pointed out as the three left, wary of the anti-postmen father. "Double d, what just happened?"

"I believe we are now part of a hidden love story between a girl we rescued from our sworn enemy and said enemy's minion. For charity."

"Oh. Remind me to kill Ed later."

Ed found the red postbox down the street, near where the King of red lions waited in the harbor. He ran back a few paces and jumped into the box, distorting its shape into his. "Hello? Hello?" he called before freeing his head from the box, "Yup, it's a mailbox!"

"Ed, that's not how a mailbox is used!" Double d scolded as Ed climbed out, "Now if you would be so kind as to dispense of the letter."

"Oh yeah!" Ed pulled out the crumpled letter and shoved it inside the almost-ruined box, "Now what?"

"Well, I was thinking that now, with this ethics-breaching deed done, we could either ask others around town or we could try asking the Maggie abode for hints about the whereabouts of Laruto's descendent."

"What, back to the snotty guy and his crazy daughter?"

"I'm afraid we're close to running out of leads."

"Following the leader, the leader, the leader, we're following the leader, wherever she may go!"

"Come on, Ed." Eddy grumbled as the three started asking people.

Finally after 24 hours they tried the Maggie residence again, only to come when an argument had begun, ". . . Honestly, you just don't understand, do you? Open your ears!" Pleaded a Rito postman to Maggie's father. "Silence! I'm telling you we don't allow postmen here! Begone, Begone!"

"Don't be ridiculous! I went through great trials and tribulations to go all the way to the Forsaken fortress and retrieve Moe's letter.

"SILENCE! Begone! Begone!"

"Then please, be reasonable! Can you At least sign for the letter?"

"SILENCE! Begone! Begone!"

"JUST ACKNOLEDGE I WAS HERE!" the infuriated Postman begged, which was once again answered with a "SILENCE! Begone! Begone!"

"Raaaawrk! Foolish man!" the postman turned to leave, "now you have made me angry, I cannot even look you in the face any longer, or fear I might . . . I must go somewhere to cool my feathers." He left then, and that's when Double d thought of something. "A well traveled Rito like him might know who Laruto's descendent. Hopefully we'll be able to speak to him outside of here." Double d and the Eds followed the Rito to the Café where Kevin and Nazz found the Eds again.

"I still can't believe this place doesn't sell jawbreakers." Eddy mumbled, remembering yesterday when he asked. The postman stood next to the counter taking deep breaths. "We heard what happened in Maggie's house," Double d started, clearing his throat, "We were wondering if you could help us with something . . ."

"Oh, it's you three. I'm Sorry you had to witness me fly off the handle like that. I'm most embarrassed. That man just . . . never mind."

"Awww . . . every birdman has his day!" Ed assured, giving the Rito a comforting (If not unspeakably painful) pat on the back until Ed slapped his hand away. "To tell you the truth though . . . I came this letter, addressed to Maggie from a Moblin named Moe, but as you saw her stubborn father won't permit me to give it to her. What a stubborn, meddling old man, refusing to accept letters from the post man! Whoever heard of such nonsense?! "

"The guy's a jerk," Eddy snorted, slurping the cheapest drink the café sold, that is, a cup of filtered sea water, "Money does something to people, let me tell you." Double d gave him an accusing glance as the Rito continued. "I went to great trouble to go all the way to the Forsaken Fortress, and it was a most frightening ordeal, let me tell you."

"We've been there too, actually," Double d shuddered, remembering Gannon, "It is certainly not a joyful place."

"But I have other deliveries waiting to be made! I cannot mope here forever." Ed, who seemed to be thinking in his own slow way, grabbed the letter and proclaimed, "I will deliver this letter to the heart broken Maggie! Or my name is Bob!" he ran out the door, slamming it hard and breaking several things, before opening it again, "And it's not!" and breaking everything else in the room with another hard slam.

"Actually that could work," the postman smiled a little, which is difficult to do when one has a beak, "That stubborn old man may not allow postmen inside his home, but surely you three could get inside without raising alarm, couldn't you?"

"Ah, why not, just to annoy the old fart!" Eddy agreed, following Ed without the destruction. Double d followed, but then remembered why he was doing this in the first place. "Oh, by the way: What do you know about a sage named Laruto?"

"I personally know nothing," Double d turned to leave, discouraged, when he added, "Perhaps Valoo's attendant, Medli might. After all, she does work directly for Valoo." That's when Double d remembered it, from when they warped to Dragon roost from mother and child isle. The different music being played on the island, _it was played by a lyre!_

"Eddy! I know who our new sage is!" Double d raced down the stairs of the Café to tell Eddy what he learned as Ed happily bounded across the street, crashing into a windmill/ lighthouse the Eds fixed last night for a treasure, knocking it over. "Uh-oh." Ed pushed on the bottom of the windmill, standing it up again, albeit with crooked sails. He and the other Eds entered the old man's house like before, and snuck past him to his daughter, who was still pining for Moe by the window. "Delivery for Maggie!" Ed said, almost loud enough for her father to hear, "It is stinky-er than I am!" Ed held out the putrid letter, making Double d wince and Maggie gape, "Is- is that?! Could it be? The letter from Moe I saw in my dreams?!"

"You see letters in your dreams?" Eddy asked flatly as Maggie took the letter, reading it feverishly, "This is Moe. I . . . like . . . you . . . Ma . . . ggie . . ."

"Where have I heard that shaky way of talking before?" Eddy rhetorically asked, glancing at a Double d that didn't notice.

"So . . . much . . . that . . . I . . . want . . . to . . . eat you . . . for dinner." The Eds, who each had somewhat of a smile at the moment, now stared at the letter horrified, "Um, Maggie, there's something you should know about the dietary preferences of Mobl-" She ignored Double d and went on a love fueled rant "Did you hear that, Those words? This means, I mean it must mean, can it be? Is this his marriage proposal?"

"More like a supper proposal." Eddy whispered to his friends.

"At last my feelings have been conveyed to Moe, at last he knows how I feel!"

"This is just like the end of the movie _I dated a mutant pig-viking!_" Ed remembered perfectly. "This is the happiest day of my life! From here on out, today will be the anniversary of love between me and Moe!"

Double d sighed "c'est la vie."

"I like Sailor Venus too, Double d!" Maggie just then remembered them, "I must thank you for your role in this. To commemorate my anniversary of true love, I give you this." She handed them a piece of heart.

"Sweet! It's the last one we needed!" Eddy fit the fourth piece into the notch the first three created, making a full heart container. "Treasure it always!" she sang happily as the Eds left.

"So, we ready to find that sage?" Eddy asked, walking calmly down the streets of windfall. "I certainly am," Double d huffed, looking back at the auction house, "Love certainly is a strange thing . . ."

"You'd know!" Eddy smirked at his friend.

"Excuse me?" Double d asked as Eddy sped off for the boat, "This adventure's almost over, you better start making that casserole!"

Ed laughed and followed quickly, "Casserole gives me gas!"

"Can we stick to the matter at hand?" Double d called as the three piled onto the king of red lions and set their course for Dragon roost.


	15. Eddy's spine makes a great airbag!

"Why didn't I remember the sound of the lyre sooner?" Double d wondered out loud as Ed swung them past a chasm on Dragon roost, following the sound of the golden instrument as night began to fall, "We could've been here thousands of words words earlier!"

"It could've been worse," Ed offered, "Microsoft word could completely shut down for days on end and bring progress to a standstill."

"You need to stop reading those comics Ed!" Eddy offered as the three climbed onto a ladder leading to a steep cliff. Medli stood there, playing Laruto's lyre absentmindedly. "What a discovery!" Double d whisper-shouted, taking out the Wayfarer's guide, which was filling up nicely, "It – seems – the - Zora's – now – bereft- of – fresh – water – developed- wings - and –became - the – Rito's." while he wrote more notes on the mysteries of evolution and natural selection, the other Eds approached Medli. "Nice harp you got there!" Eddy remarked casually, surprising her, "were you listening to that? Oh, how embarrassing . . ."

"I think it is prettyful sounding, like a seagull cawing at another one!" Ed offered the odd simile. "This instrument is called one of fate's tools." She held it up a little, confirming it was Laruto's, "Prince Komali's grandmother saw me carrying it one day and called out to me to stop. She'd seen my fate in the curves of the instrument, you see. She eventually became my teacher, and that's how I became the attendant you see before you today."

"Fascinating," Double d sincerely remarked, taking note of the story in the guide.

"So now you understand why I need to hurry and improve my skills, so that I may help the aerie."

"The what? Uh . . ." Eddy put Double d forward and swiveled behind Double d with Ed, who was staring blankly out at sea, "Your turn Double d!"

"Oh! Yes, well," Double d pulled out the wind waker, "Perhaps I may help."

"Hey, is that the wind waker? Wow!" she stopped playing to look at it, "Double d, will you conduct me? I wonder how I'll do . . ."

"Hopefully well." Double d replied, playing the earth god's lyric, and Medli played along as well as she could. When she was finished, she turned back to the sea and thought, "Hmm . . . what a mysterious song . . . it sounds so . . . familiar."

"Did it work?" Eddy stepped ahead of the other Eds, hoping to see what would happen next. "It's almost as if something I forgot is trying to be – Remembered . . . oh . . . I feel . . ." she barely got out as she fell backwards. All she heard was a quiet crack and a loud "Yeouch!" from Eddy before completely blacking out.

The world around Medli was pitch black, all but Laruto, who held her ghostly version of the lyre steadfastly. Slowly, Laruto played the Earth god's lyric, then Medli followed, and the two played a duet that could bring the strength back to the master sword, no matter how powerful Gannon became.

"Man, she's dead from the neck up!" She heard Eddy mumble, as her eyes began to flutter open. Her face felt warm and wet. "She's coming to!" Double d shouted happily, "Do it again, Ed!" she heard Ed snort and hack above her, and her eyes popped open. "ED, I'M AWAKE!" she pushed herself off Ed's lap and whipped the previous loogie off her face.

"Medli? What on earth happened?" Double d asked when her face was clean. "Just now, a sage spoke to me. She spoke so gently . . . there's something . . . something I must do."

"Like what? "Ed asked, as if he already didn't know.

"Eds, thanks to you I have been awakened to the knowledge that I am a sage of the earth temple. There's something I can do to actually help this world, it's incredible!"

"I know exactly how you feel," Double d looked back at the master sword, thinking about what the king of red lions said about the triforce of courage. "I bet my teacher knew all about this." A small tear trickled down Medli's cheek. "There there," Ed cooed gently, "Just remember what Eddy said about salads."

"What about salads?"

"I forget." Medli continued diligently, "Eds, please, you must take me to the earth temple. We must hurry and wake the power that sleeps within the master sword."

"I spy with my little eye," Ed said, pointing at an object moving through the sky, "Something that is royal!" sure enough, it was prince Komali. Medli knew that a formal goodbye wouldn't work. "Let's go now, quickly and quietly."

"All aboard who's going aboard!" Eddy whispered as the Eds slunk away, but Medli lingered up to the last second. "Oh Komali . . . I just want him to remember me as a simple attendant."

Prince Komali flew high over Dragon roost, searching for the special roost Medli would practice her lyre on. In his hands was an orchid from northern triangle island, and in his head he practiced what he was going to say once he landed "Medli, ever since my grandma died you've been like a mom for me, and I enjoy that. But what if you were _more_ than tha- no, that sound's stupid!" he tried again, thinking of another approach, "You know Medli, we've known each other for a long, long time, and I don't think I'll ever meet another Rito girl quite like you. Come to think of it, there are no other Rito girls my age, God I'm desperate!" as he lowered down onto the platform, clouds brushed past him as he thought, "Say Medli, I found these orchids all over northern triangle island, and now that the cyclone's gone I was thinking we could go there and just stare out at the wat- oh what am I saying! I should just come out and say it: Medli I love you, and quit beating around the bush!" now resolved Komali landed, only to find Medli gone. And by the time he had searched the whole island and asked everyone, the Eds and Medli had warped away to eastern triangle island, and nobody else knew their location.

"Well that only took forever." Eddy grumbled as the four steeped back onto the shores of the earth temple. The king of red lions spoke for the first time in a long time, "Medli, listen carefully to what I am about to tell you. The temple ahead is the nest of an evil creature . . . the same creature who stole the life of your predecessor, the sage. It is a dark and frightening place. That is why, if you do nothing else, at least do this . . . if any of the Eds call you, be silent and follow them closely."

She nodded and the magical boat continued, "Also, allow them to lift you and if need be fly and carry them through the air."

"Although it would be advisable to carry us one at a time, since our combined weight would be overwhelming."

"Why can't we just use our leaf?" Eddy asked but was ignored.

"And Eds, if Medli gets stuck and cannot continue in the temple, use the Wind Waker to conduct the song you learned in the Tower of the Gods. Do you understand?" The king of red lions was of course referring to the Command melody, a song that allowed the Eds to take on the consciousness of a statue while moving it. "Well, I suppose I understand . . . though it sounds a tad unusual."

"Double d, we've met a giant dragon, a talking tree, and a giant wind frog, nothing is normal now." Eddy reminded him as the king of red lions finished his thought, "Eds, protect Medli, and Medli, protect the Eds. The power to repel evil will surely return to the Master sword!"

"It has been absorbed!" Ed smiled as they entered the temple.

"Now, let's see if a full-fledged Earth sage can do something about this door." Double d conducted the Earth god's lyric and Medli played it on her lyre. As soon as the song ended, the rock split in half and light shone from behind it, "It's gonna blow!" Eddy shouted, diving behind Ed with the others in tow. Instead of exploding though, it crumbled into rubble. "Do it again, I wasn't looking!" Ed pleaded after it was too late. The three entered the room beyond the door, where a huge hole was dug out. The Eds and Medli entered this hole, into a world of shadow and death. The monsters of this temple were almost always corpses and spirits (Much to the delight of Ed but the horror of everyone else), and light was very scarce. Without the teamwork of all four of them, the temple might've been impossible. Light was often a strong weapon against these dark spirits, and eventually the Eds found a way to harness this power.

"Man, those Redeads were creepy," Eddy shivered, unlocking a door at the end of a darkened passageway, "Remind me to cremate myself when I die."

"The next room appears to be a dead-end, suggesting a major monster battle," Double d said, examining the map, "We'll probably end up back-tracking, so I would suggest you stay here, Medli."

"Oh then, good luck." The young Rito waited by the door.

"Don't forget to write!" Ed smiled as they entered the relatively well-lit room. The floor consisted of nothing but dirt. "How unsanitary!" Double d exclaimed, "Locked in here with all this dirt, and coffins!"

"Relax Double d," Eddy started walking out onto the dirt, "It's not gonna kill you, sheesh- what the?" the ground shifted beneath Eddy as a skeleton rose from the floor, almost taller than Ed, brandishing a club. Eddy jumped off its head and ran behind his friends. "Evil Tim has beckoned him!" Ed shouted as double d corrected him, "That's a stalfoes, they're very dangerous!" Eddy threw his boomerang at its head and while it was distracted, shouted "You take him, sockhead! You've got that whole "Blade of evil's bane" Thing going for you!" Double d was pushed ahead and swung his sword with one hand, covering his eyes with the other. Eventually the bones fell apart, leaving the head to bounce around on the floor. "CRUSH THE MONSTER!" Ed shouted, taking out the skull hammer and smashing the skull, finishing it off. But as soon as that was done, the two coffins in the room popped open, releasing two more stalfoes. The three Eds worked in tandem like this until the stalfoes were no more. "That was almost kinda fun!" Eddy smiled as a stairway lowered in front of them. At the top of the stairs sat a chest. Double d opened it to reveal an ornate shield, its silvery front shined in the light. "This might prove useful soon. Ed, might I entrust you to use the hero's shield well."

"Can I have your hat, too?"

"Let's not get carried away here." The three solved many puzzles and battled many monsters with the help of both this and Medli, and all too soon they were at the boss door.

"Finally, we're almost done here," Eddy sighed, shaking off some smoke from a now-deceased smoke-bubble. Double d unlocked the door, giving a small speech while doing so, "Gentlemen, and Lady, we've come far on our quest to restore the Master sword, but now our journey is about to end. Beyond this door lies the unknown, but also the path of-"

"Just open the door, Shakespeare!" Eddy barked as the lock fell away and the Eds entered. But before Medli could enter, the door slammed shut behind them, and metal bars shot up from the ground. "Well that's just great. We come all this way to revive this stupid sword, and the stupid door locks out our sage!" Eddy tugged at the bars, while Double d and Ed looked at the room itself. The walls were covered in spikes, and in the center of the room, in almost every color of the rainbow, ran Poes in every direction. Poes were the souls of wicked and greedy people incarnated, but since the room was so well-lit, they were now solid. "They're kinda funny-looking, huh Double d?" Suddenly all the Poes turned to look at them, making Double d jump. The room turned dark, and a giant Poe's mask appeared in the center of the room. This the Poes filed into, making one giant, fat Poe. "Eddy?" Double d called, making his friend turn around and snap, "WHAT? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M- holy-" was all he got out before the three scattered from the rain of fire from the monster's lantern. Double d ran to a beam of light and shined his mirror shield on to the transparent fiend, making him solid again. "Ed, assistance please!" Ed lifted the hulking beast and threw it into a wall, causing it to break into its smaller components. The Eds slashed and shot at these, until those that remained regrouped into the big monster, which was now slightly smaller, this they continued to do, avoiding its fire and its confusion-bringing body-slams, until the last Poe fell. "Is it just me, or is this getting easier?" Eddy asked as the mask floated into the air and exploded in the filtering sunlight, giving the Eds another heart container. "Perhaps we are simply getting better at this?" Double d offered as Ed pulled them into another hug "We are getting harder, better faster, stronger!"

"Is it safe?" Medli asked behind them. "Where'd you come from?" Eddy asked, staring at the door. "Near the end of the fight, the door opened for just a moment, and I rushed in before it could close again." She panted, as a blue light began to shine from the center of the room, in the center of a Triforce symbol. Double d and Medli nodded to each other, and while they prepared to play the Earth Gods lyric, Double d placed the Master sword in the blue light, where it stood up on its own. As Medli played, the spirit of Laruto joined in, and the master sword shone brightly. "Well then." Double d picked up the sword, feeling a sort of electricity run through him as the hand guard opened up to both sides, showing the power that had returned to the blade. "All we had to do was open it up?" Eddy asked, staring at the blade, "That's stupid!"

"Well at least some of the power is returning to it." Double d sighed, holding it up to admire its blue sheen, "But I'm afraid that before Gannondorf can be slayed by this, the prayers of the wind sage are necessary."

"OH COME ON!" Eddy grumbled as Medli spoke to them, "Now Eds, the light behind you will bring you back to the surface, and from there you must find the sage of the Wind temple. I will remain here and continue to pray." Ed, thinking in his own special way, pulled a potato out of his pocket and gave it to Medli, "This is my lucky potato, may it serve you well!"

"Umm . . . thanks." She took the spud and put it in her pocket.

"At least you'll have something to eat!" the Eds stepped into the center of the Triforce mark, just as Medli remembered one final obligation, "And Eds, umm . . . about Prince Komali, Please watch over him for me."

"Tallyho!" Ed shouted as the three spun and ascended into the over world. They returned to the king of Red lions and plotted a course northwest, to where Double d was certain the item they needed to enter the wind temple would be: Ice ring isle.


	16. Revenge of the cereal mascot

"Jeez, it's like the day after tomorrow over here," Eddy shivered as they neared the island "Does everything we do haft to be difficult?" He shot a fire arrow at the front of the island, and it warmed up just enough to let them on. "It is odd, isn't it? That one place in particular can be so cold while other places nearby aren't." Double d said, stepping on to the island and immediately slipping. "Whoa!" He slid one way, then another before finally landing on his face. Eddy laughed loudly, "I've heard of getting your tongue stuck to something cold, but not your entire- Whoa!" Eddy started sliding down a steep part of the ice, his legs shot out from under him as he slid down the embankment on his butt. "Oh my," Double d struggled to get to his feet, the ice making it difficult to stand, "Ed, would you mind giving me a hand here?" Ed smiled and backed away, to where Double d couldn't see him. "Ed? Don't you leave me in this pre-" Ed dove over the embankment on his belly, pushing Double d forward with both hands. "TAG, YOU'RE IT!"

"Whoa-whoa- whoa!" Double d screeched spinning across the ice like a star. "TOO FAST, TOO FAST!" He dug his toes into the thin surface of the ice, managing to slow himself down enough to stop at the very edge of the icy platform. "Yahoo!" Ed laughed Rolling over onto his stomach after the sliding. "Umm . . . thanks Ed, but next time just-"

"WILL YOU LADIES HURRY UP?" Eddy shouted from a floating chunk of ice in the middle of a freezing cold bay, "We've got a Ganon-dork to stop, remember?" Eddy jumped to the next one, which used to be heading towards him, when suddenly it slid back, dropping Eddy into said cold water. "Eddy, are you alright?" Double d asked, jumping onto the patch of ice and helping Eddy back onto it. "Yeah, whatever. Let's just keep going." Eddy mumbled as they entered the dragon-shaped cavern, where it was no colder or slippery than outside and no less.

After falling into icy water twice and freezing several times from the horrible ice keese the Eds made it to the back of the room, where another chest lay in wait. "Well, that certainly was an exhilarating adventure."

"Can we hurry up; I can't feel my toes anymore!" Eddy grumbled as Ed threw open the chest and practically dove into it. "Look what I found!" Ed smiled, pulling out two heavy metal boots. The three Eds stared at them for a moment before Eddy shouted, "WE CAME ALL THIS WAY TO GET SHOES?" Ed put the shoes on and started to walk, shaking the ground as he walked past. "Um, fellas?" Double d called, looking dismayed, "We may experience some technical difficulties here." A huge wind tunnel blocked their path and would certainly blow them away if they tried to cross it. "Oh, I have an idea!"

"That's never a good sign Ed." Eddy reminded before Ed picked him and Double d up and marched across the wind tunnel, lucky that nothing was blown away. "See what I mean? You weren't meant to think!" Eddy shouted when they got to the other side, throwing a snowball at Ed. "Actually Eddy, this has given me a wonderful idea . . .

"The ants go marching one by one!" Ed chanted, marching across the wind temple in the iron boots, Double d and Eddy waiting in the king of red lions. When Ed got to the front of the island, he took out his skull hammer and smashed the octorok statue that was blowing all that wind. "Way to go Ed!" Eddy called as he and Double d joined him. "I like smashing things guys!"

"That's nice Ed, maybe you'll find something to smash inside the temple." The three Eds entered the hole previously covered by the statue, only to find another wall like the one in the earth temple. "Aww, nothing to smash!" Ed moped as Double d played the Wind God's Aria (The tune written on the wall) with the wind waker. When he finished playing it the triforce mark on the wall began to glow and another figure appeared in the room with a gust of wind. The Eds stared at this new sage, wondering why he looked like a young boy, before it spoke, "Are you the new hero?"

"Umm, heroes actually." Double d responded, more confused now than frustrated. It was as if the sage and others before him could only see him.

"Oh right! There are three of you here, aren't there?" the ghostly sage added, without opening his eyes or ceasing his smile, "I am Fado of the Kokiri tribe. I know I appear to you as a child, but the eyes can oft deceive. I am a most esteemed sage."

"Why are you talking like Shakespeare? That's what I want to know!" Eddy added.

"Would you rather I talk like Gilbert Gottfried?" the sage asked in a Gottfried accent.

"No-no! The Shakespeare thing was fine!" Satisfied, the Sage continued, "I have been praying here so that the power to repel evil would continue to be contained within the blade of the master sword." The sage held out his arms, as if to embrace the Eds, but stayed still, "But I was attacked by the evil Gannondorf . . . and this is what happened to me."

"So Gannondorf murdered you as well," Double d jotted down this note quickly, "In that case we don't have much time. We need the power of the master Sword back before Tet- I mean Daz- I mean Zel- _I mean_ She who must not be found is found." He stuttered, blushing with every near-slip of the tongue.

"In that case, look for the one who has the same instrument as I hold, and teach him the song you just played." Ed took one look at the violin the Kokiri held and shouted, "I remember this!" he tried to grab it and hold it up, but his hands merely passed through it, since it was as much spirit as the sage. Instead he pointed at it and said, "Our little forest buddy had it last!"

"Makar!" Double d and Eddy replied in unison.

"So if we play this song for him, he'll faint, have an epiphany and help us?" Eddy asked.

"In a nutshell, yes." Fado seemed to sigh, even though his face didn't move even an inch, "That Wind Waker you hold was used long ago to conduct us sages when we played our songs to call upon the gods. In those days it was always the king who conducted for us . . . please, tell the king that I will still play, even in the next world." The Eds turned to leave, but the spirit called to them one more time. "I must remind you of one more thing: this journey cannot be done alone. Even the powers of this world mean nothing to Gannon if you are alone in facing him. You could restore the master sword to ten times its former glory and still you would fall."

"Thanks for the warning Confucius!" Eddy thanked the disappearing ghost with a grunt as he pushed Ed out the door, "Come on Double d!" Double d looked back to the wind temple chamber, to where Fado used to be. _Can't be done alone?_ He thought, slowly following the other Eds to their boat, _what does that mean?_

"Bah, he was probably talking about our little princess." Eddy assured him as Forest Haven began peeking out over the horizon.

"What do you mean by 'our princess' Eddy?" Double d asked, leaning past Ed.

"Aw, you know," Eddy leaned back on the figure head, pretending to be Double d, "Tet- I mean Daz- I mean Zel- _I mean_ She who must not be found."

"Well I knew that, but why do you refer to her as 'our' princess."

"Ooh, possessive. Never thought you were the type Double d."

"I didn't mean it like that! I only meant to ask why-" He began as the boat jarred to a stop on Forest Haven. Eddy flew off the figure head and onto the island dramatically, followed By Ed and Double d less violently. "You three do realize we could warp here, right?" The king of red lions asked.

"Yeah, but Double d was off in la-la land." Ed joked, patting Double d on the back. In truth Ed and Eddy could only summon small gusts of wind on the wind waker, and when they tried to warp on their own they could go no higher than a foot.

"Sorry." Double d mumbled, turning away. That's when he began to hear the violin playing close by, "Makar can't be far, I suggest we hurry and find him." The other Eds agreed and began searching the rocky shores fruitlessly. "What is he, invisible?" Eddy asked rhetorically after searching the entire island twice. Double d had called for Makar so much his voice was bordering hoarseness. "Hey guys!" Ed surfaced from a small pool he was searching for Makar in with a huge grin on his face. "Did you find him Ed?" Eddy asked from the Edge next to Double d. "Uh-uh, but there's something behind the waterfall."

"The waterfall." The other Ed's looked at the fall, where violin music seemed to be coming from. "Ya think . . ." Eddy began while Double d produced the Grappling hook. "There's only one way to find out. Let's have a look shall we?" He threw the grappling hook at the overhead log and the three swung over the pool into a hidden chasm behind the waterfall.

Inside sparse plants rose up from the sides of the hall and though there were several torches burning inside fireflies still lit the insides well. Their stood Makar, playing Fado's violin without a care whatsoever. He looked up and saw the Eds, and he stopped playing, "Oh! Eds! I haven't seen you in quite some time, have I?"

"Sorry we could not visit little buddy." Ed apologized, "We've been busy beating up monsters!"

"It's not a problem." Makar's voice changed pitch, as if thinking, "I'm surprised you were able to find me here . . ."

"By the way, why are you down here, it was fairly hard to find you you know."

"I'm practicing a new song for next year's ceremony. And I need privacy!"

"Oh, sorry little buddy!" Ed started to leave, but Eddy caught him. "Hold up monobrow, he's the reason we came all this way!"

"It isn't any fun if everyone knows what song I'll play in advance."

"You do realize we can hear you from outside, right?" Double d asked.

"What? You can hear my song outside?"

"Well, yeah, that's how we tracked you down!"

"Ruh-really? I thought the sound of the waves would drown it out. Perhaps I should play a little more softly when I practice from now on." Makar began to play some more when Double d cleared his throat and took out the wind waker, "Anyways, we came all this way for a song request of our own."

"Why, is that a conductor's baton?" Makar asked, once again ceasing his playing.

"It sure is," Eddy smiled, acting as he often did while scamming someone, "Why, wouldn't it just be dandy if Double d conducted you?"

"Oh, could you Double d?"

"I certainly can, but it will be a particular tune we picked up on our travels if you don't mind."

"What kind of song is it? Oh I can't wait to hear it!" Double d played the Wind God's Aria to Makar, who listened intently t it. "Hmm . . . does it go something like . . . this?" He began to play the song, "Strange . . . why does it feel like I already know this song?" the Eds shrugged and Makar continued to play. While he played the lively song Fado's spirit played right along with him, which left the Ed's mouths gaping. Overcoming the shock Double d began playing along to the tune with the wind waker. When the song ended the two bowed, and Fado faded away, leaving only Makar.

"Double d . . ." Makar muttered while Eddy tapped his foot impatiently on the ground, "This sacred song you've conducted for me has awakened me . . . I know myself now! I am the Sage of the Wind Temple . . ."

"Yeah, that's great, let's** go!**" Eddy growled, picking up the Korok and carrying him away. "But Eddy, I need to do a speech on my newfound responsibility and need to restore the Master sword!"

"Been there, done that! We've already wasted too much time sailing here!"

"For once I actually agree with Eddy. Gannondorf won't waste a moment in trying to thwart our plans."

"Tik-Tok, on the clock, but the party don't stop!" Ed sung as the four climbed onto the King of Red Lions and promptly rode a cyclone to the Wind temple.

Within ten minutes the heroes arrived at the Wind temple. "Took us long enough." Eddy mumbled as Makar jumped off his head, which in turn hand rested on top of the King of Red lion's head, making a sort of totem-pole. The three Eds and Makar climbed off the boat and onto the sands of Gale Isle. "Eds, as well as the case with Medli, I have no doubt that Makar, too, has some special role to play in these events."

"No freaking duh, Captain Nemo." Eddy said, rolling his eyes at the King of red Lions.

"By cooperating you four can overcome the dangers and pitfalls of this temple."

"Can do floating boat Santa guy!" Ed responded as the four entered the Wind temple. "Speaking of Medli, how many days has it been since we put her in the Earth temple?" Asked Eddy as they stood in front of the stone door and Double d conducted the Wind god's Aria.

"I think it's been about five days now." Double d Replied as Makar played the song and they entered the temple, "Why?"

"Well, not that I should care or anything, but all we gave her to eat is a potato." Eddy said as each Ed and Makar jumped into a hole in the ground. Ed step back a pace, then cannon-balled into the hole, Shouting "Beep-beep!" and laughing stupidly.

"True, if she were to starve, the ramifications could be disastrous." Double d and Eddy continued their conversation as they battled monsters and solved puzzles. "By the way, when was the last time we've eaten anything?" Eddy asked.

"I think it's been, maybe . . . a month and a half?'

"**A month and a half? HOW ARE WE STILL ALIVE?"**

"Really don't know Eddy. Funny thing is I haven't been hungry since our journey's begun. Almost all biological functions are at a stand-still until the most convenient time to bring them up, it's as if all logic-"

"Uh, guys," Ed wrapped one arm around the other two Eds and pointed up at an earthen pedestal, "Makar just got kidnapped."

"Really?" Double d asked dumbfounded, "How'd that happen?"

"As he was planting another tree for us to eventually use to our advantage, several floor masters popped out of the ground and sucked him into the void." Ed explained, "He didn't stand a chance, really."

Double d sighed, "I guess we better go save him."

"Gee, ya think?"

The Eds progressed rapidly though the Wind temple using their many tools and their own skills and soon found themselves in the sub-boss room. "Well Gentlemen, it seems we are on the verge of saving Makar."

"Took us long enough," Eddy grumbled as they unlocked the door to the sub-boss room, "I can't wait to finally smack around something big. AND I MEANT A MONSTER, YOU KNOW THAT, RIGHT?" suddenly a loud, shrill beeping filled the room, "Oh great, now we've tripped the alarm!"

"Actually Eddy, that is the call of the common wizzrobe. A formidable enemy indeed." Just as he said that, the wizzrobe appeared before them: dressed in an emperor's robes with the head of a toucan.

"**That's **our enemy?" Eddy began laughing at it, "What's Toucan Sam here gonna do? Froot loop us to death?" then the monster joined in laughing before summoning another wizzrobe and a darknut. "Ok, not funny anymore." Eddy shouted as the three began to fight the two new enemies, but as soon as they landed a hit on the other wizzrobe, the first summoned a dozen Keese to join the fray and shot fireballs at the Eds. This continued log after they defeated the first two enemies and a whole new set had been brought in to fight them. "This is getting us nowhere." Double d finally concluded, "Let's just focus on killing the Wizzrobe and work on the other monsters later." The wizzrobe would often disappear and reappear in random spots, so whenever t appeared the Eds would fire arrows at it or smack it with their swords, if close enough, until it finally fell. After finishing off the other monsters, a chest appeared before them. "Note to self, don't make fun of Wizzrobes." Eddy remarked as Double d opened the chest and pulled out a glove with a point at the end of it.

"It's a hookshot." Double d announced, putting it on, "it allows one the ability to pull objects closer to them or adversely pull themselves to far away locations. Like so:" Double d pointed the device at a target on a wall and shot it out, it pulled him over screaming. "Cool!" Double d jumped down from the pedestal beneath the target and pointed to another one, "I believe that is our way out." Beneath the target sat a hammer switch. Ed hookshot himself up to the device and hit it with his hammer, unlocking the door. "Perhaps we can use this to free Makar." Double d suggested as they left the room. The three began hookshooting themselves up a giant hub room up towards where Makar had been left in a small jail cell.

"Eds, you have returned!" Makar cried out from beyond his cell, which was guarded by a stone head. "We have come to free you Makar." Double d replied, handing over the hookshot to Ed, "Do it just as we planned, Ed."

"Yeah, and don't screw it up."

"I will pierce the heavens!" Ed replied, donning the iron boots and shooting the hookshot at a target on the statue's forehead. The statue came down on Ed and crumbled all around him, but he didn't even seem to notice. "Ed, are you alright?" Makar and Double D asked in unison. "I am Ok, especially now that you're free little buddy!" Ed replied, hugging Makar. "Well, now that Makar it free, I feel we may progress on to the boss chamber."

The Wind Temple was full of many traps and monsters, but the Eds and Makar pulled though it valiantly. After passing though one final hallway of puzzles, they made it to the boss chamber. "Makar, you stay here and leave the boss to us." Eddy took out a few arrows while Ed started smashing pots for supplies. "Ok, good luck Eds!"

The Eds entered a lard room atop an earthen cliff. Beneath it sat a sand-covered circular drop-off with a stone platform in the center bearing the symbol of Hyrule on it. Eddy put one arrow into position and drew back, pointing all around the room, "Guys hold up! These monsters usually catch us off guard, but this time I'll land the first hit! Now if only I could find-"

"I AM A SAND ANGEL!" Ed laughed from below in the sand pit, waving his arms and legs around in the grains.

"Ed you idiot!" Eddy shouted, jumping down into the pit, "You gave away our position!"

"Oh come now, Eddy." Double d protested, riding down into the pit via a hookshot, "The monster isn't even here yet." no sooner had he said it that the ground beneath them began to shake and sand began to pour into the chamber from up above and the platform began to sink. The Eds ran to the corners of the room to escape being buried. "You just had to say something, didn't you Double d?" as soon as Eddy said this, the ground shook once more and a giant grey worm shot out of the ground, jaws gnashing together as it flew around the top of the pit and dove back down into the sand.

Its mouth then poked out of the sand, and for a moment, all seemed calm. "Is this one even going to fight back?" Eddy shot an arrow at its tongue, but it passed right through with no damage. "What the? Why you!" Eddy lobbed a fire and an ice arrow at it, but this provided less results. "The arrows," Ed pointed at the tongue, "They do nothing!"

"Perhaps a different approach would work," Double d fired the hookshot at it, pulling the blue appendage to the others. While Double d hacked at it with the Mastersword, Ed and Eddy hit it with arrows and the Skull hammer until it pulled away and unleashed a pair of smaller worms that the Eds promptly hookshot at and slashed, smashed, and fired away at as well. After pulling it in again and attacking it, the giant worm beast leapt into the air and flew around in a circle again. "How the heck is that thing flying, anyway?" Eddy asked as it began to dive-bomb toward them.

"WE CAN ASK THESE QUESTIONS LATER!" Double d responded, pulling the other Eds away just in time. The Eds attacked this worm-monster twice more in this fashion before it finally fell. Or rather flew up into the air, became stagnant, and exploded into a heart container gloriously.

"Finally, this dungeon stuff is over!" Eddy grumbled as the sad receded and the royal platform emerged again. "Oh Eds, you've done it!" Makar bounded into the room joyfully before producing his violin, "Now we may restore the Mastersword to its former glory!"

"Right." Double d placed the sacred sword into the Triforce pedestal and began to play the Wind god's aria with Makar and the ghost of Fado joining in. Eventually, it seemed that even the Gods hummed along. "I'm a skipping to my loo, Eddy!" Ed remarked, dancing oafishly around the pedestal and the players.

"Big deal. We ready to beat up the Ganon-dork yet Double d?" as he said this, a new power seemed to seep into the sword.

"Well, one way to find out." Double d retracted the sword and looked it over. A power surged into the sword as he did, shocking him slightly. The blade glowed a heavenly white, and a jewel in the center lit up like a sacred torch. The power to repel evil had returned to it. "Yes Eddy, I do believe we are now ready to take on Ganondorf."

"I shall continue to pray to the Gods here," Makar said, seemingly wiping away tears, "Eds, please step into the light and return to the ground above." Ed took up Makar in a hug, "I will miss you little buddy!"

"Cheer up Ed." Double d put a hand on Ed's shoulder and smiled, "We'll see him again before you know it."

"Are we DONE here?" Eddy asked, standing in the light, with one foot out of it much like one would if holding an elevator in place, "'cause I'd like to get the plot going again!"

"Coming Eddy!"

"May the winds of fortune be at your back!" Makar called to them as they left.

"I wish I had a tail." With that the other Two Eds stepped into the light and faded towards the surface.

"Hey Aslan! We got the-" Eddy started before Ed clasped a hand over his mouth. "Look Eddy, a fishie I see!" he pointed to the sea where the King of Red Lions was speaking to one of the fishmen. The three Eds ducked behind a tree to listen in.

" . . . I see. So . . . the Forsaken Fortress has already. . ." the magical Boat/ King began.

"Ahh, like a molting snake that casts off its dead skin." The fishman replied.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Eddy whispered while the others shrugged.

"That place is so empty and quiet . . . one can almost hear the echo of dead leaves falling to the cold, cracked ground." The King of Red Lions looked puzzled, or possibly even concerned with this news.

"Why, what ails you," The fish asked, "what? Lose the long face! The monsters are gone from the world! Doesn't that make you a little happy?" it asked, as it dove back down into the depths of the great sea.

"There are no more monsters in the world?" Double d muttered before Ed unsheathed his sword and jumped out from behind a tree. "That means I have defeated all the monsters and vanquished the great evil! I AM THE MAN!" He ran around and laughed for a minute until Eddy caught him. "Ed: How could you have killed all the monsters in the world if you were in the Wind Temple THE WHOLE TIME?"

"I haven't a clue Eddy, but I'll figure it out someday."

"Ed, I have troubling news . . . Ganon has not shown himself above the seas since Valoo unleashed his fiery wrath upon him."

"Is it possible that Valoo, I dunno, actually** killed him in the blaze**?" Eddy Asked sarcastically.

"Again, no. only the Mastersword can kill him. And what's worse, there is not a creature stirring in his base of operations in this world . . . the Forsaken Fortress."

"How can that be a bad thing, your highness?" Double d wondered.

"True, it may be a sign that Ganon has moved on, and yet I cannot shake this foreboding I have about the princess Zelda."

Double d's eyes widened at the mention of her name, "Should we go check on her if you're so concerned?"

"Yes, but I think the time has come for us to search for the triforce shards first so that we may be better prepared to best Ganon."

"Wait, we haft to do MORE stuff?" Eddy Grumbled as they climbed onto their boat, "And where'd this other tri-force come from?"

"We'll explain on the way Eddy!"

"And where'd you get that sense of urgency, hmm?"

"I'm just concerned for Princess Zelda."

"Oh, of course you are." Eddy chuckled.

"You know what I mean. I worry about her for Hyrule's sake."

"Yeah, of course you do loverboy. Where's the Casserole?"

Ed and Eddy promptly began to sing the K-I-S-S-I-N-G all the way to Windfall, nearly driving Double d mad.


	17. Everyone Hates Tingle For A Good Reason

_[This chapter of the Edwaker brought to you in part by Mr. Clemens math class._ _Mr. Clemens math class is where your interest grows_._]_

"So tell me Double d," Eddy back-flipped off the King of Red Lion's horns onto the dock of Windfall Island, "If these "Sacred Triforce of Courage" pieces or whatever are underwater, then why don't we just go back to Hyrule and hike for them there?"

"For the same reason we couldn't do that with the sages." Double d said, opening a section of the boats side, climbing onto the dock and closing it again, where it re-formed into the boat as if it never existed at all, "The paths to them are closed-off, but the pieces can be salvaged via our crane. But what we lack is a working location to it, some sort of chart showing their locations." Ed tried to open the boat the same way as Double d, but only succeeded in breaking off a chunk of it. "I will fix that later."

"Yeah you better. So where are we gonna get a chart like that?"

"Well, seeing as this is the island of riches perhaps an old merchant somewhere has a chart of their locations."

"HEY GUYS!" Ed danced around a shaking mailbox with glee, "We've got mail!"

"That's "We have mail", Ed." Double d and Eddy joined Ed at the box.

"Helloooooooo!" Chimed the red device, "Mail for the Eds: Two letters." The slit in the box spat out a dusty gray piece of parchment, with the name Aryll chicken-scratched on the non folded part. Double D gently removed the paper inside and read the first sentence to himself.

"Well, it seems we've finally gotten news on our lost-"

"READ IT OUT LOUD DOUBLE D!" Ed shouted, leaning awkwardly close.

"Yeah, we don't have all day." Eddy grumbled, tapping his foot.

"Very well then; _dear Double d, _

_Sorry I couldn't write to you sooner, paper and ink are hard to come by when you're sailing the sea."_

"Why's she still on the boat?" Eddy asked as Double d kept reading with confusion.

"_Not that I mind, really. While I was trapped in that cursed cell the one escape I could always reach to was the sea, and by extension the seagulls."_

"I love seagulls guys!" Ed shouted as commentary.

"_I guess I should explain why we're not home on Outset yet. You see, since she was captured, Sarah tried to organize a rebellion of her own against the forces of evil. Either she's very inspired,"_

"Or a major brat." Eddy mumbled.

"_Or has the makings of a fierce leader. The latter seems more likely, since she's taken Tetra's place as leader of the pirates in the short time she's been gone. It was her order to sail after the tower burned down. Since then she's been leading the crew much like their old leader would, with a few exceptions:"_

"What!" The Eds collectively cried in shock.

"Ed, I know she's used to kicking you around, but what the heck? That little squirt, leading a whole pirate crew, did you know she could do that?"

"I didn't know she had it in her." Ed said with a grin while Double d and Eddy began to dread returning to Outset with her.

"_New rule number one: Tea time is at exactly Three o'clock every day. The entire crew is to attend on pain of being hung by their toes from the mast in their Sunday bests, which is what they wear to tea. Here is a pictograph of it."_

The pictograph basically showed the crew in clothes similar to the one in the Hyrulean painting, only much more frilly and with many more bows in their hair. Also everyone in the pictograph was miserable, save for Aryll and Sarah, who seemed to be enjoying themselves "AH-HAH-HAH-HAH!" Eddy grabbed the pictograph, relishing at the near-suicidal looks emanating from Niko and Senza, "This is gold, Double d! I wonder how much copies of this would sell for."

"We'll do no such thing, Eddy!" Double d folded up the picture and stored it in his hat where nobody dared reach.

"_New rule number two: The ship, formerly known as _The Epona_, shall henceforth be known as The Dolly Pooh-pooh, and shall promptly be painted pink when we get enough paint."_

At this point Eddy was laughing so hard and so much it seemed soon he might choke to death on his own laughter. Finally he slowed down enough to utter a single line, "Wait till the Dazel-nut hears about this!"

"_Rule number three: There are to be at least six raids a week against the many beasts of the sea, work starts at sun-up and ends at sundown. Pay will be distributed amongst the crew by effort and worth to the cause. Sure, the crew hates the rules, but since the pay has near-tripled they follow her anyway. Speaking of which, I sent you boys some rupees to help in your quest."_

Eddy stopped laughing in an instant and dug into the envelope violently, pulling out a yellow rupee. "I LOVE YOU ARYLL!" he shouted to the sky as he shoved the stone into his wallet.

_The pirates themselves are quite kind despite their roughness. Gonzo even gave up his hammock so I could have a place to sleep (Sarah took Tetra's room.) Niko's told me so much about you three, and so has Senza. I wish you the best of luck in your following adventure and hope we'll see each other again soon._

_Your new Aunt,_

_Aryll._

"Letters for the Eds: One letter." The box continued after the Eds read Aryll's, "Postage due: 201 rupees. Will you pay?"

"Skip that one, Ed." Eddy replied, still feeling the weight of his wallet, "Think of all the jawbreakers we could but with th-" Suddenly Eddy whipped around, hearing the sound of rupees falling into a hollow place. Ed was gleefully dumping the contents of the 200 rupee wallet into the mailbox slit while Eddy gaped. "You're welcome!" Ed announced, before Eddy could finally say something.

"**ED YOU IDIOT!" **Eddy shouted, Launching for his neck, "DIDN'T I TELL YOU NOT TO WASTE MY MONEY A BILLION TIMES SINCE WE FIRST MET? WELL, DIDN'T I?" While Eddy strangled Ed Double d pulled out one more stashed rupee and fed it into the box, "Well, we put this much money into it, might as well see what it is." It spat out a letter with the word "Tingle" scrawled even more poorly onto it than Aryll.

To the Esteemed Mr. Fairy person,

Thank you very much for your purchase; Enclosed is an IN-credible chart.

"I don't care if he enclosed the freaking Holy Grail!" Eddy shouted, "When I find him, I'm gonna-"

"That's it!" Double d shouted, pointing at the text, "This chart will Show you where you can find the Triforce Charts. I want you to use it to find lots of them – they are my favorite kind of charts!" Double d removed the IN-Credible chart and opened it, which showed the same basic design as any chart anywhere, save for several pictures of charts on several charts. "This one on the private oasis should be an easy one to reach." The Eds piled onto their miraculously-fixed boat and warped to the tower of the gods and sailed south, all the while Eddy grumbled over the lost rupees.

"This island smells like fresh-cut spring flowers, spewning over a babbling brook with a hint of lemon." Ed drooled while Double d peeked over the edge of the mesa-like island. "I do believe you're right, Ed. The island is practically choked with flowers and lemongrass, and that waterfall pool looks absolutely stunning."

Eddy, who had just devised an anchor with the iron boots and grappling hook, jolted up in shock, "Lemongrass?" He pushed Double d and Ed aside and stared at the small territory, which looked for all intents and purposes like the ideal island getaway.

"So, that chart did say this island, right?" Eddy asked while Ed chased a pretty butterfly on shore.

"It's the only island in the E5 coordinates on the map, which strikes me as odd since all islands and archipelagos tend to fit into only exactly one coordinate each despite-"

"And the chart's probably just inside that cozy little hut, right?"

"That'd be the first place I'd check."

Eddy sat there for a moment, staring at the oasis, then he raced onto the island, shouting "This is gonna be easy!" all the way there.

"Eddy, wait!" Double d shouted after with Ed following behind, "You can't just barge into someone's home and demand a chart from them. That's stealing, not to mention an infringement on the right to privacy!"

"Oh, oh, and-"Ed added, ripping up a patch of lemongrass and using it as a model of Eddy, "there could be a horrible Re-dead horde waiting inside, ready to scream away the songs of the demented to paralyze you and eat your insides in a casserole dinner!" Ed gave an odd, half-snort-half-scream and dramatically ate the clump of sod, saving the lemongrass head, "Like so." He added before eating the lemongrass itself.

"Ok first off: Ed, you're crazy. Second, there's no one here, and with an island as nice as this who needs locks?" Eddy reached for the handle of the door, which had an ornate carving of an old man in a butler's pose, "I'm sure they won't even miss it, come on you stupid door!" Eddy shouted, turning, pushing and pulling on the door.

"Unhand me you ruffian!" the door shouted before Eddy lost grip and fell back onto the porch of the hut.

"You know what?" Double d turned to his friends, "I'm not even going to question this. The only mystery I can call upon is why my hat can't talk yet!" an awkward silence settled before Ed broke it by poking the hat and offering, "Maybe it's just shy."

"Forget the hat!" Eddy shouted before banging on the door with his fists, "Let!" Smash, "US!" Smash, **"IN!" **Smash!

"Enough!" Shouted back the door, "keep your filthy, mischievous hands off me you scoundrel!"

"Eddy, let me." Double d got between him and the door and said in a reasonable voice, "Sir, it is imperative to the fate of the world that we enter. Inside this home lies the chart that will lead us to the power to defeat the most evil man alive. Please, we beseech you; allow us inside for only a moment."

"No, I cannot allow it!" the door replied, "The only one allowed inside this cabana is the master, who resides on Windfall. And since you are no sort of master, I will not accept you in."

"Master?" Eddy fumed, grabbing Ed by the ankles, "I'LL GIVE YOU A MASTER!" He jerked Ed upwards and swung him violently at the door. "Ding-dong!" Ed chimed as his body painlessly made contact with the door. Eddy and Ed repeated this smashing and ding-donging process three more times before Double d stopped them, "Gentlemen, please! The door is sentient!" Eddy dropped Ed and glared at Double d, "You're just jealous your hat can't talk!"

"Be reasonable Eddy, using Ed as a battering-ram is unproductive to our ends and will likely do permanent damage to Ed's spine!"

The other Eds mulled over Ed's inability to feel pain before Ed mumble, "Gee-It sure is boring around here."

"I suggest we look for the owner of this cabana, explain the situation to them and plead for entrance. With any luck we will be-"

"BACK TO WINDFALL!" Ed picked up his two friends and carried them to the boat.

"The cabana's owner, you say?" Lorenzo was standing in front of one of the photos in his gallery, which contained the very cabana the Eds just visited, "She's Miss Marie, she owns the schoolhouse on this very island. Why do you ask?"

"Umm . . . well, it's kind of a funny-"

"We're conducting a survey!" Eddy added before Double d could say anything about the Triforce or Hyrule.

"Well, good enough reason for me! You'll find her school across the square from my shop, to the right."

"Thank you Lorenzo!" the three Eds made a beeline for the door before Lorenzo called out to them again:

"Don't forget, you promised to send Tingle back to Windfall so that we may punish him for escaping. We're counting on you!"

"It's on our list of things to do before the disclaimer/closer chapter." Double d replied, gently closing the old oak door of his shop, "Eddy, why didn't you want me mentioning the Triforce?"

"Isn't it obvious?" He replied as they wandered up to Miss Marie's school house, "If the Triforce is the sacred power of the Gods, then telling anyone about it could start a gold rush! Anyways, why would a Kanker open up a school of joy?"

"Oh, come now Eddy! Surely there could be more than one person named Marie in the world; we're living proof of that!" And yet, Double d froze at the door, fearing an obvious trap. He could feel the walls and bushes outside the schoolhouse staring at him (He didn't know at the time that these eyes were the eyes of pre-pubesant boys, but the feeling was still there). The other Eds could feel it too.

"Alright, on the count of three, we shove the door open. If we so much as smell a Kanker, we make a break for it." They didn't hear another boy in the bushes say nearly the same thing a few seconds later. "1 . . ." Counted off the Edds

"1 . . ." Counted off the younger boy in the bushes a second later.

"2."

"2."

"3!" The Eds shouted, tossing the door in and dashing inside before slamming it shut again.

"3!" the other boy reacted a second too late, catapulting himself into the closed door with three other boys in the group. "Darn it! They out foxed us!" said a boy who looked rather like Chouji from Naruto for little to no reason.

"Hey, don't sweat it!" Said another boy who to be honest could easily pass as a girl, "They can't stay in there forever. Din knows we couldn't."

"Now it's just a waiting game," Said the one who seemed to be the leader, or just the Irish stereotype of a street-wise cap sporting ten year old, "When they come out, we'll get 'em. Jun-Roberto, get us some Jawbreakers, this could take awhile."

The Eds tumbled into the small classroom and landed in a pile at the feet of an older woman, who looked like the exact opposite of Marie Kanker in every possible way. She had fluffy looking pink hair that was done up to look a giant butterfly and the only blue on her were her eyes and copious amounts of jewelry. She was also in her mid forties and quite cheery, "Hello children, welcome to Mrs. Marie's School of Joy!"

"School of joy?" Double d looked around the classroom, noticing painting children had made and a few basic math problems on the blackboard.

"I don't think I've ever seen your faces around here before, my young scholars . . . are you new pupils?"

"Well, uh . . ." Double d trailed off before Eddy replied,

"Actually, we're cabana inspectors!"

"Cabana inspectors? Aren't you boys a little young to be going into people's homes and grading them on cleanliness and design."

"Yes, yes we are."Eddy responded with a bored yet confident glaze in his eyes.

"Well, obviously you've come to me because my cabana's door butler stopped you from entering, am I right?"

"Yes," Double d finally found something to say, "and it's vital that our inspection is done without delay, lest we lose our jobs."

"Well boys, I'll be frank with you." Mrs. Marie sat down in a child sized chair, "That door is not just my butler, he's also my husband."

"Oh, well . . . that's interesting." Double d mumbled.

"Why did you marry a door?" Eddy said loudly and bluntly.

"Co-ol!"Ed grinned.

"The problem is, I'm getting older and going to the Cabana gets harder and harder every year. I'd much rather stay on this island and teach children they ways of joy, creativity, and uniqueness."

"Sounds good to me!" Eddy replied, "But we still need to make that inspection on your house, so wadda ya say?"

"Listen, I'll make you a deal: I'll give you the cabana deed if you do three things for me, first by sending my husband to Windfall so we can enjoy our golden years together."

"Creepy old-" Eddy began to mutter before Double d elbowed him, "We'd be happy to ship him over in the most luxurious manner possible. What's the next stipulation?"

"There's this delinquent gang of four young boys who never listen to a word I say. Even though I wait patiently for those boys to show up for class, they never come. It's as if they don't want joy in their hearts!"

"Ok, so let me guess," Eddy replied, "You want us to give them a good straightening out, the whole stay-in-school chat and all?"

"At least talk to their leader, Ivan. I'm sure if he began enjoying school, the rest would follow."

"Fair enough," Double d turned to his comrades, "Shall we start with this, due to our proximity to the request."

"Let's move 'em out!"

"Figures all the good teachers live on Windfall." Eddy said cynically, "With Sturgeon, it was always, "Eddy, wake up! You're missing our discussion on bowline knots." And "Eddy, I hope you brought enough jawbreakers for everyone in the class!" and "Eddy, be careful with that gunpowder! Lord knows I've lost enough manuscripts from your hand."

"Oh, come now Eddy! Surely Sturgeon wasn't that bad." Double d replied, not noticing the children closing in on them.

"Well he was good for a laugh," Eddy elbowed Ed, also ignoring the gang before him, "Hey Ed, remember the time we gave him an El Mongo stink bomb for his birthday?"  
"Yeah, his house smelled worse than my basement for a year!"

"Man, those were good tim-" Eddy began before Jun-Roberto pinned him to the ground. "Uncle, UNCLE!" he shouted, not expecting it. At the same time Jin, the Choji-like one, tied up Ed with a yo-yo. "THE KIDS NEXT DOOR ARE ATTACKING!" Finally Jan, the androgynous one, leapt on to Double d from behind and knocked him to the ground, "D-don't make me use the power to repel evil on you."

"Shut it, sock hat!" hissed Jan.

"That's my line!" Grumbled Eddy under the weight of Jun-Rob.

"So, you're these big-shot Eds I've heard about?" Asked Ivan, still savoring his Jawbreaker, "You bimbos don't look like you could save a rupee to save your life, let alone enough for a jawbreaker; That Kevin guy was a rotten liar."

"Kevin set us up?" Eddy shouted, "That lousy, two timin-"

"We're not working for him," Ivan corrected, "Killer bees work alone. He just warned us about some "Master Conmen" who were fixing to pillage this village. Well, two can play at that game!"

"Actually, we are interested in another endeavor," Double d said, easily shaking of Jan, "You're name is Ivan, correct? You're teacher has requested we speak to you on the benefits of education."

Ivan sneered, "Ooh, a nice guy! You know what, I'll make a deal with you: if you beat us in a round of hide-and-seek, we'll go back to Marie's classes no questions asked. But if we win, you give us all the rupees you've somehow managed to collect. Deal?"

"Are you nuts?" Eddy growled, pushing aside Jun, "We've already managed to lose 201 rupees today, I'm not putting anymore on the line!"

"Oh sure, save the rupees!" Double d said sarcastically, "It doesn't matter that the fate of the universe could ride on this game or that innocent lives depend on us finding all the triforce pieces within the next two installments of this fan-written crossover of two interesting and nostalgic pieces of fiction, so long as your rupees are safe."

"That was painfully meta." Ed added.

"So what do you guys say?" Ivan asked again, "Do you wanna play?"

"No!" Replied Eddy, clutching his remaining rupees.

"Yes!" Double d corrected him.

"Maybe." Added Ed, who just wanted something to say. The Eds began a shouting match on the matter then:

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Maybe."

"No, NO!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Maybe."

"Yes!"

"Maybe."

"No, NO, **NO!"**

Eddy and Double d were now wrestling each other over the matter.

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"_YES!"_

"**NO!"**

"_**YES!"**_

"_**NO!"**_

"_**YES!"**_

"_**NO!"**_

"_**YES!"**_

"It flew real low," Ed began to say before Ivan shouted at them all.

"Enough! Look, we're all going to hide, and you can decide if you wanna come find us or not. No going indoors or leaving the island. Later!" Ivan and the gang took off leaving Eddy and Double d to wrestle around some more.

"No!"

"Yes!"

"N- Where'd they go?" Eddy asked, regaining himself, "And Ed, how'd you get untied?"

"I ate the yoyo!" He announced, "Discreetly."

Double d sighed, "I'm going to track them down, before either of you try again to derail our plans to save the world from chaos and brimstone. Or worse: Make me lose my composure in public." He stormed off, leaving Ed and Eddy in the Windfall square.

"That kid needs to sort out his priorities!" Eddy said, wandering off as well.

"Ok, so if I was a materialistic thug, where would I hide in a game of hide-and seek?" Double d said out loud, to angry to think to himself, "I think the better question here is: where would Eddy insist we hide?" He thought back to scenarios in a completely different setting without magic or fighting and remembered an ideal bit. "Of course: the fake bush hideaway!" Double d turned to his left and poked his head into a bush. "Bleck, Real bush." He coughed up a few leaves and turned to the bush to his right. Before he could poke his head into this one, Jan shot out from behind it. "Wait, Please!" Double d chased after him, catching him in a corner where a ramp begun, "young lady, Please! You don't understand! If you don't start attending classes again your teacher, who is apparently a machanophiliac, won't allow us to enter her cabana and take the Triforce chart hidden inside; and if we don't do that the triforce of courage will never come into completion and the dark lord Ganondorf will take over both this world and the hidden Kingdom underneath this one and likely kill it's princess, who I'll admit is a very charming and unique young woman in her own right, and will likely lay waste to us all." Double d was almost in tears at this point, "Please facilitate the end of our quest so that we may prevent such an occurrence."

Jan looked at him funny and scooped up a hand full of dirt, "Ok, I only understood one thing in that entire sentence, and let me say: I'M A BOY!" Jan threw the clod of dirt at Double d and ran away.

"_OK THAT'S IT!"_Double d wiped the dirt off his face and ran towards Jan, who was heading towards a large tombstone-like object near a cliff. "I am tired of people ignoring what I say so they can take the easier option!" Suddenly Jun Roberto shot out from behind the spot. "Perfect, I'll be able to catch two birds with one- EDDY?"

"Double D!" The two Eds crashed into each other, with both Killer bees between them.

"**Finally caught ya you little brat!" **Eddy remarked, pinning the boy down.

"Wait a minute; you're trying to find them too?" Double d asked, "What about Ed?"

"I'm a cowboy, bang bang!" Ed replied loudly as Jin dragged him to the spot by the corner of his shirt. He let go once Eddy caught hold of Jin and he was officially caught. "Does that answer your question?"

"Yes, but why? I thought you didn't want to risk your rupees."

"We changed our minds when we remembered all that stuff you said a second ago. And by the way: I knew it!"

"Eddy, this fic is contrived enough without you positioning yourself as a shipper on deck."

"Hey guys, I see the last one!" Ed had the Telescope out and was pointing it at a tree. Sure enough Ivan was sitting on top of it, twiddling his thumbs.

"Excellent! Now all we have to do is find some method of reaching the top of the tree and retrieving him safel-"

"Fly Double d Fly!" Ed Grabbed Double d and threw him at the tree. "Ed, not again!" Double d shouted as he sailed over Ivan and landed on the dock next to the King of Red lions. "Double d, what on Earth happened?" the living boat asked him when he landed. "We were playing hide and seek to get the triforce chart and Ed chucked me at a tree."

"Oh . . . interesting."

"Ed, you're gonna get someone killed tossing them at tre-"

"Hey guys, you're ba-" Nazz began to say before Ed caught her too. "Fly, Nazz, Fly!" and he tossed her at the tree too, not even getting close to the treetops. "Ed, QUIT DOING THAT, IT'S NOT WORKING!" Eddy seethed, not wanting to make any more of a spectacle than they'd already made, "try something else."

"Oh, I know!" Ed rolled up into a ball and began barreling down at the tree.

Meanwhile at said tree, Double d was trying his best to climb up to Ivan on branches barely thicker than his arms, "Ed, why must you be so . . . nrgphgtlbl . . . _impulsive?"_ He panted pulling himself from a branch two feet from the ground to one three feet from the ground. "I don't know how Johnny can-"

"Da-Da-Ling!" Ed howled as he crashed into the tree, knocking Double d and Ivan off.

"Case in point." Double d sighed laconically before noticing Ivan tumbling to earth. He held out his arms to catch him but because this series survives primarily through comedy Ivan missed his arms and landing on Double d's head, knocking both to the ground.

"I AM THE FASTEST THING ALIVE! Chilidog, please!" Ed chorused once all seemed well.

"ED, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?" Double d and Eddy growled at him once he regained his footing.

"We're trying to find these kids, not kill them!" Eddy added, grabbing hold of Ivan before he could make his escape, "All right kid, we've found all four of ya. Now wadda ya say, go back to class, or do we have to make ya?"

"Nah, you don't have to make me do a thing," Ivan replied, shaking Eddy's grip on him, "a killer bee keeps his word. Bees, assemble!" The other bees formed a line before the Eds, "Henceforth we promise to attend all our classes until we graduate . . . or die in our desks."

"Well, that heartwarming declaration was darker than it needed to be," Double d added, making his way towards the school of joy, "Shall we tell Mrs. Marie of these developments?"

"Double d's advancing the plot!" Ed followed behind with the others, where Eddy smacked him behind the head for alluding to the real world.

"Ah, you three young lads are back, and you brought those lads I told you about with you, how nice!"

"Mrs. Marie, we've come to tell you that we've made a change, repented if you will. From now on we will attend your classes as per usual." Ivan replied before the Eds could.

"Oh, marvelous!" Marie replied, hugging Ivan, "There's so much to teach you boys, such as the joys of flowers, and puppies, and clouds, and clouds with puppies in them and-"

"Yeah, that all sounds mighty keen, ma'am," Eddy interrupted, "But we still have the issue of our job, so why don't we put this on hold for a moment, hm?"

"Ah yes, you three young lads." Marie pulled the cabana deed from a random spot in the air, "You've already made my work easier and agreed to my 'personal errand', so I've decided to trade you the cabana deed for only 20 joy pendants."

"You got a deal, and only because you didn't ask for rupees," Eddy smiled and snapped his fingers, causing Ed to grab Double d by the ankles and shake him until nineteen joy pendants.

"You know, you could've just asked!" Double d said, pulling himself to his feet.

"Only nineteen?"Miss Marie collected the pendants anyway, "I'm afraid this deed is worth no less than twenty joy pendants."

"I don't believe it!" Eddy took the spoils bag and dumped the contents onto the floor of the schoolhouse, "I could've sworn we had a bajillion of these things."

"We did, but you sold forty-one of them to Beedle."

"Oh come on, Freedle offered to buy them for twenty rupees a piece, how could I resist?"

"Uh, fellas?" Ivan held out an extra Joy Pendant, "I found this in the tree. Go ahead and give it to her, as extra thanks for saving my life."

"Woohoo!" Eddy took the pendant, tossed it in the air, grabbed on to the Cabana Deed and only jerked it away when the pendant landed perfectly around Miss Marie's neck, "Thanks kid!"

"Remind me to ask how you did that." Double d calmly mumbled as Eddy pulled him and Ed out of the room and back towards the Cabana.

"Tootaloo for now!" Ed Called back behind them.

"So, you three ruffians have come to vandalize this old door yet again." The door to the Cabana chastised the Eds.

"Yeah, sure, call it that." Eddy pulled out an arrow and began undoing the hinges to the door.

"WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING? CEASE AND DESIST AT ONCE, YOU RUFFIAN!"

"Please sir, we don't mean you any harm," Double d pulled out the Cabana Deed, "The previous owner sold us the deed on the condition that we ship you to her current residence on Windfall Island. We hope you understand."

"Oh." The old door tried to grin but his stoic face was frozen solid, "Well it's about time! You have no idea how lonely it gets on this island when she only comes to visit once or twice a year. I've resorted to starting a book club with the local fauna." {Cut to a chipmunk and a seagull sitting atop copies of _The Canterbury Tales_, both copies soiled and missing pages due to their "owners" mistreatment.}

"Great, you'll love it at your new home." Eddy undid the last hinge and handed the door to Ed, "Ed, take this guy down to the mailbox. If they need postage, get it from the grass."

"I never knew you could use grass clippings for postage." Ed commented, picking up the door and heading for the mailbox.

"Alright, Triforce chart, triforce chart," Double d and Eddy began searching the inside of the house while Ed forcibly shoved the living door into the mailbox, "Eddy check in those potted plants, I'm going to check behind that giant picture of Jimmy."

"Yeah sure, I'll- GIANT PICTURE OF JIMMY?" Eddy wheeled around and stared at the picture, which showed a giant picture of Jimmy smiling sweetly.

"It appears to be a finished image of a puzzle on the other wall, perhaps when solved the triforce chart will be awarded to us." Double d began shifting pieces of the puzzle while Eddy sat back and snarked.

"Ok, first she marries a door, and then she takes a picture of Curley-Q, blows it up into a giant wall decoration, and builds a puzzle around it. The laws are really slack in this world, aren't they?"

Double d moved the final piece into place and waited for the triforce chart. And waited. And waited.

"I bet it's a dud." Eddy muttered, "Try it again!"

Before Double d could touch the puzzle pieces again, the familiar "Da-na-na-na-na-na-na" Of a solved puzzle broke their thoughts.

"That's odd, nothing seems to have happened."

"Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na- SPIDER ED, SPIDER ED,"

Ed climbed up and down the grappling hook line, which was hanging from a hook in the center of the ceiling, "Here comes Ed on the hook line, but his name's not Ed, It is SPIDER ED, SPIDER ED-"

"Boy, the migranes I have to put up with." Eddy commented, tuning out the rest of Ed's song. Double d had been looking around the room, trying to find the source of the finished puzzle, when he noticed the fire had gone out in the fireplace.

"Eddy, Ed's done it!" Double d made his way towards the fireplace, "The Triforce chart is down there!"

"C'mon Ed."

"-your hand, SPIDER ED- WHOA!" Ed was pulled off the line by Eddy and down into the hole in the fireplace.

"Gee, this is a lovely place to keep treasure," Eddy waded up to his chest in water, "Grimy water, lots of rats, and I'm pretty sure this is all part her septic tank."

"Can't you be optimistic for once, Eddy?" Double d asked, trying to discern which path to take, "At least there aren't too many monsters down here."

Ed, who had been walking ahead of the other two, stopped and pointed at a row of screaming Readeads, "I warned you about the readeads, Eddy! I told you guys!"

"AAAAAAGH" The other Eds screamed and dragged Ed away, stumbling into a deep yet dry chasm as they escaped.

"Boy that was close." Eddy remarked before sniffing the air, "There are rupees down this way! Come on, boys." He slid into a tight chasm at the bottom of the wall with Double d and Ed following behind. Several wrong turns and several rupees later they came upon a room with nothing more than a ladder in it. At the top of the ladder a couple of floor switches and metal grates blocked the Ed's path before Ed disposed of them with his skull hammer. On the other side of those sat two more chasms and two more crawlspaces. This process repeated itself far too many times to be enjoyable before falling into one chasm with two readeads in it. One grabbed Double d and began chewing on his head, "HOW UNSANITARY!" he screamed while Eddy tried to get a clear shot at the monster. "Ed, do something!" he shouted. Ed's brain sprung to life as he grabbed a vase by the wall and chucked it at the redead's head, "Be gone, Dead-head!" the redead dropped Double d who took the chance to hack it to pieces and Eddy the chance to fill the other with arrows. When the dust, and rupees, cleared they noticed a hole where the vase had been. "SECRET TUNNEL!" Ed shouted As Eddy and Double d climbed into it.

"I really do hope the chart is over here, I'm starting to get tired of finding nothing but rupees."

"What do you mean, 'getting tired of rupees'?" Eddy replied as they entered another room, "Who gets tired of rupees?" they climbed up the ladder into a marble room with a red and a blue circle on the floor.

"Great, now what?" Eddy asked as Double d pulled out the wind waker.

"Well, I can't be sure, but due to the pinwheel symbol on the tiles I think we need to play the wind's requiem."

"Oh goody!" Ed squealed as Double d played, "^ "

"^ " Replied the Gods themselves, causing a treasure chest to reveal itself to the Eds. Double d reached in and pulled out a Triforce chart.

"Finally!" Eddy undid the string holding it shut and tried to read the writing, "I think it's in Chinese."

"I remember Tingle mentioning his ability to decipher charts."

"Yeah, well, knowing him he'll charge us an arm and a leg for it."

"It seems we have no choice, Eddy."

"Everybody say 'Jamaica!" Ed added as they left their cabana (Literally titled Eds' Cabana) behind for Tingle Island.

"My lord, does Tingle actually call that bizarre obelisk his home?" Double d wondered aloud as the dizziness wore off from warping.

"Geez, it looks like some maniac carved it and painted it while having a demented nightmare." Eddy added while crawling off the boat onto the rocky shore, "That ladder looks like it's going to be a nightmare to climb." Ed grinned, realizing that he was needed, he bit on to Eddy's back collar "Hey!", and Double d's "Ed STOP!" and grabbed hold of the laddar. "Offui ho!" Ed remarked, which is exactly what one sounds like with two t-short collars stuffed in their mouths and try to say "Up we go!"(I should know; I tested this in my free time.) "Ed you got spit all over me!" Eddy barked once they made it to the top.

"Noooo, so unclean!" Double d whined, trying to wipe the spit off his shirt. While he was doing that, two men dressed similarly to Tingle (One in white and one in pink) came up behind the Eds and addressed them, "Hey, are you two the ones who threw that dreaded contraption of my brother's into the ocean?" The pink one, Aka Ankle, asked.

"Eeyup!" Ed replied, "It made a nice dent in the clouds over Dragon Roost."

"Sweet! I told you they'd save us!" The white one, Aka David junior, high-fived Ankle.

"Save you from what?" Eddy asked, "King crazy the third?"

"Oh, but you boys don't understand," Ankle sighed, "Tingle may seem kind, if not a bit loopy, but he is a cruel and greedy man. I grew up with him as my eldest sibling, where he learned to steal whatever he could from me through brute strength and treachery. And when he got older, he embezzled me out of every rupee I ever made, to the point that the only way I could ever pay off his debt is to spend the rest of my life turning this giant head of his in a circle in a ridiculous pink costume."

"And then he caught me seven years ago," David Jr added, "I was working at my dad's law firm at the time and Tingle was not only wanted for embezzlement but for theft, bribery, blackmail, extortion, insurance fraud and being the most annoying man alive. The minute I landed on his island to give him his court order, he burned my boat and put me in this tacky white shirt. Ever since I have been working for him against my will. My Dad doesn't even know I'm alive, I'm worked to death almost every day, and I stink to high heaven!"

"That's awful!" Double d replied, "Why does he have you turn this contraption, anyway?"

"WE DON'T KNOW!" the two replied, throwing their hands in the air, "Just save us, PLEASE!"

"Alright, we'll save you," Eddy marched over to where Tingle was sleeping, "But first he needs to decipher some charts for us."

"Yay!" Ankle and David Jr. embraced and began singing, "We're gonna be free, we're gonna be free!" several times before going back to work.

"Hey Tingle, Wakey wakey!" Eddy slapped Tingle a few times before he woke up and noticed Ed. "Oh! Mr. Fairy! I've been longing to see you, sir!"

"Hello Mr. Sillyman!" Ed replied calmly, once again forgetting who Tingle was.

"What should we play?" Tingle said in a slightly creepy tone, "what do you want to play?"

"Actually Tingle; we've come here to enlist your services in deciphering maps."

Double d interrupted with the Triforce chart.

"Hmmmmmm? That fragrant, musty scent! Sir! You have found a chart!"

"We know, just decipher it for us!" Eddy shouted, disturbed by Tingle's phrasing and attitude towards his friends.

"Oh yes, certainly, I'll decipher it for 398 rupees!"

"**WHAT? 398 RUPEES?" **Eddy screamed.

"Hey, take it or leave it buddy!" Tingle replied.

Eddy grumbled, but handed over the rupees anyway, "just wait until we finish beating up Ganon-dork!" Eddy growled. Tingle took the chart and set it on the ground, "Tingle! Tingle! Kalooh-Limpah!" Tingle shouted, throwing confetti, "Become . . . Readable!"

Double d picked up the chart and found that the picture was of the Coast of Outset Island, complete with directions and coordinates, "come on guys, the Triforce is close to home!"

"398 rupees for that, what a gyp!" Eddy commented before sauntering back to the boat.

"Ed, a little more to the left!" Eddy directed from the top of The King of Red Lions, "not your left, THE BOAT's left! Jeez, you know how the great sea works; can't you help us out here?"

"Hey, it's not like I have sonar!" TKoRL responded, "Besides, deciding how best to retrieve the triforce shard is in and of itself a test of your wisdom." Double d shot up with an idea, "we could position ourselves on the beach and in the water at precise locations in accordance to the treasure marker and use trigonometry to find the direct location down to the nearest-"

"BORING!" Ed and Eddy said in unison, "Ed, just drop it at random, we'll find it eventually."

"Why do I even bother?" Double d wondered before being splashed by a wall of water.

"'allo Eddboys!" Rolf landed on a beach ball before them, "How goes your quest to set right what once went wrong?"

"It's going great, stretch," Eddy lied nonchalantly, "Ed, try the other side!"

Rolf climbed onto their boat and peered over Ed's shoulder, "You seek a treasure beneath the waves, yes?" Rolf asked the three.

"Yes, and it would be much easier if we used proven mathematical theorems!" Double d replied as Ed drew up the crane.

"Have no fear, ulcer-loving-Edd-boy, Rolf shall aid your efforts without the need of wimpy numbers and addition," Rolf grabbed onto the end of the grappling hook line and dove into the water, "Slahouur!" the line went down rapidly as he swam deeper.

"Good lord man!" Double d yelped.

"I didn't even know we could do that," Eddy added, "how long can he stay down there?"

"I don't know; his swim meter sank with him!"

"Rolf's a guy?" Ed added, before the whole boat jolted twice.

"He needs to come up," Double d realized, "Hurry Ed!"

Ed retracted the line as fast as he could, using all his strength, as the line was heavy. When it finally surfaced Rolf stood triumphantly on the front of a large metal chest, eliciting cheers from the Eds.

"Rolf, how on earth did you do that?" Double d asked, helping Ed bring the chest and Rolf onto the boat.

"Anything is possible when one is the son of a shepard," Rolf replied during a transition, "Rolf is now on a bird!" Rolf's giant, red, duck-billed and totally awesome bird screeched before soaring up into the stratosphere, "Farewell for now, Subdivided-Edd-Boys!"

"Bye Rolf!" Ed replied before jumping up and down with excitement, "Open the box, Double d, open the box!"

"Now calm down Ed, I'm working on it," Double d struggled to open the lid as the music swelled and eventually paused itself when he got it open to allow him to catch his breath, before returning when he held up the shard.

"Ooooooh!" Ed gushed before Edd stored it under his hat.

"Well, that's one down, seven more to go."

"Seven more?" Eddy asked, growing visibly nervous, "Double d, can I borrow a calculator?"

"I don't see why not," Double d replied, retrieving a calculator from his hat, "Gained a sudden interest in math?"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever!" Eddy quipped, punching in numbers before screaming,

"_**3,184 Rupees?**_

I hate everything."

Indeed, it would be a long, mostly offscreen, quest.


End file.
